Notes:

Warnings: angst, fluff

Pariring: Joe Anoa'i x Reader

Originally published here: post/171588058281/happiness-songfic-roman-reigns-x-reader

NEEDTOBREATHE - Happiness

The song used for this SongFic was Happiness by NEEDTOBREATHE. Since I'm not allowed to post the lyrics here, please look them up accordingly. :-)

You had already expected that it would be hard dating a wrestler that was on the road for the most time of the year. But if you were honest to yourself, you didn't exactly expect that it would be that hard. You missed him more than you could tell when he was not around and once he was back, it wasn't exactly easy. You loved him, of course you did. But that didn't mean that you could hide everything you were feeling once he was around. And you could not unconditionally enjoy those moments as you were always thinking about him having to leave again sooner than later. If you were true to yourself, you somehow feared that the both of you could not make it work out. It was one of those rare days where Joe came back home after being on the road for over a month. And the most time of him being at home the two of you had already spent arguing. "What do you want from me Y/N? That I give up my purpose in life? That I give up the passion I was born with? That I quit the job, the profession that's running through my veins?", Joe asked annoyed, with you rolling your eyes, snapping back: "That's not what I was saying and not what I am expecting, Joe and you know that. All I'm asking is that you understand and accept the fact that this whole thing is not easy for me either. That is all."

Joe tossed the dirty clothes, that he just got out of his suitcase, in the next best corner before he turned completely to you, capturing your tiny figure under an intense stare before he muttered: "Oh I can understand it Y/N, don't you worry about that. But that doesn't change the fact that I wasn't made for a job where I'm working 9 to 5, coming home every day to have a steady life and eat dinner every evening with you. I'm sorry if that is a burden for you and I'm truly sorry if it's hard for you to live with that, but all I can ask of you is to accept it. I love you and I always look forward to coming home to you and spending some quality time with you, but I can't give up my life on the road. I just can't. I need that to be happy." You groaned out in frustration. You didn't want him to skip his job and you knew that you weren't exactly making it easy for him right now but you just couldn't change it. Although it was hard, most of the time you were fine with arranging yourself with his lifestyle, making the best out of it. You couldn't even tell why it was bothering you so much currently. Well that was a lie, you had to admit. You knew why it was bothering you but you didn't feel like telling him. "I know that you can't and I'm not asking you to. Let's just end that annoying topic here. I don't really feel like arguing the whole time on those rare occasions when you are home.", you gritted through your teeth, turning your attention back to the dishes that you were just cleaning, before you added without looking at him: "Bring your clothes into the bathroom, I will wash them once I am done here."

But Joe didn't even think of following your order. Instead he moved over to the sink and leaned against it right next to you while you were cleaning the dishes with more force than was actually required. A short glance out of the corner of your eye told you that he had his arms crossed in front oh his broad chest, his jawline sharper than usual, which was a clear sign that he was boiling on the inside no matter how calm he seemed to be on the surface. His brown eyes were shooting darts in your direction as you had to force yourself to not look at him. That man was dangerous und you knew it damn well. Dangerous as in you turning into a mess when he was radiating anger the way he just did. But this was not about you and him ending up in bed, that was not about letting actions take over. For you it was about letting him now that sometimes his lifestyle gave you reasons for concern and him understanding that you didn't want him to end his wrestling career but to develop a little empathy for what was clouding your thoughts from time to time. You should probably just yell at him but you knew yourself that arguing while being emotional would only result in you crying tears of anger. And that was something that you tried to avoid under all circumstances.

"Are you intending now to ignore me for the rest of the evening?", Joe wanted to know from you and you could hear that he was anything but pleased with your behavior. "Given that you obviously don't want to understand me and prefer to twist my words into something I wasn't saying, that doesn't sound like an unacceptable choice. So yes… As long as you decide that you don't want to listen to me, I'm rather going with ignoring your sorry ass.", you spat out, still not glancing at him for one bit. "Okay that's it. If you want to act like a complete bitch, fine. But don't you dare giving me the cold shoulder now. You can ignore me afterwards all you want. But right now I want to know what the fuck is wrong with you.", Joe hissed before grabbing your arm, spinning you around, causing you to drop the plate you were holding and holding a towel out to you. "Have you lost your fucking mind?", you glared at him, ignoring the mess you had just created.

"Absolutely not. How about you dry your hands and then spill the damn beans? Because after four weeks on the road the last thing I want to do now is playing your stupid games. Not when I had other things in mind", he grunted and to avoid that you could return to the sink, he spun you around, trapping you between the kitchenette and his body. He was glaring down at you, his arms once again crossed in front of his chest as he was waiting until you did what he had asked for. "Fine", you groaned before snatching the towel from him in order to dry your hands only to toss the towel right into his face once you were done. Should you have made him even angrier he at least was able to hide it as he said: "Now talk." You imitated his gesture as you were crossing your arms in front of your own chest, glaring up at him and not saying a word. He crooked an eyebrow as he wanted to know: "You're quite aware that I have the longer breath when it comes to stupid games like that, don't you? You don't really think that I will go somewhere else now, do you baby girl?" You scoffed at him, replying: "If you want to keep me trapped here for the rest of the night, please go ahead. It's not like I give a fucking damn."

"Oh you will Y/N believe me. And you will also tell me what the hell is wrong with you.", Joe stated with you shooting him your best resting bitchface as you dared him: "Oh will I? Make me." You didn't need to repeat that and before you were able to grasp a clear thought, Joe's arms were shooting forward just seconds before you could feel him grab your butt rather harshly. He lifted you up and placed you on the kitchenette behind you while crashing his lips down on yours, kissing you with all the anger he was feeling. You tried to push him away, not because you didn't enjoy it but rather because you didn't want to give in to him that easily. Joe just groaned, pushing your legs apart and taking a step forward so you could feel him pressed against you. While doing so he didn't let go of your lips for only one second. You were mad at him, you really were but your self- control came crashing down on you. You had missed him way too much to keep your distance to him. Instead you pulled him even closer, parting your lips so Joe could slip his tongue in, in order to explore your mouth. He was kissing you forcefully but you didn't mind one bit as you responded equally to his assault. The next thing you remembered was that you were pulling on the hair tie, that held his hair in a bun, before they fell in long waves over his shoulders. He wore them open way too rarely in private for your own taste. Before he could scold you, you were already burying your hands in them, pulling on them, causing him some sweet pain that made him groan softly.

As you were both out of breath from your little make out session you could feel that the atmosphere between the both of you had changed. Both of your anger had almost vanished completely as Joe searched for your eyes, asking: "Was that enough now to make you tell me what you didn't want to tell me before?" You softly traced his lips with your fingertips, nodding in agreement before you took a deep breath and explained: "I don't want you to give anything up. I know that this is not only your passion but also your destiny. And it's quite clear to see that you aren't made for the simple life. I know that you are happy while you're doing what you're doing and I don't want to take that away from you. But that doesn't mean that it isn't hard for me having to let you go again and again, not knowing how soon you will be back. But that is something I can somehow adjust to…." Joe searched your face for an answer that he didn't seem to find there. "But that's not all that is bothering you, correct?", he wanted to know with you shaking your head before you answered: "It's just…. My god I'm probably sounding absolutely hysterical now. The thing is one of my friends had called me yesterday, feeling absolutely terrible as she had found out that her husband cheated on her. He's a lawyer and he cheated with his secretary while he's working a nine to five job more or less. With you being on the road for so long, having all of those opportunities…I just… you know…"

Joe looked at you in disbelief before he started laughing out loud. "Take me serious", you pouted while pinching his arm. It took quite some time until he calmed down so he could answer you. "Baby girl did you really just hint that you're afraid that I could be cheating on you?", he wanted to know with you just shrugging your shoulders, feeling slightly embarrassed. Joe cupped your face gently, making you look at him as he answered: "Baby I would lie if there weren't women that tried their luck. I guess every single one of us in that business had experienced that before. But I love you and only you. I would never cheat on you. Of course I feel lonely when you're not around but I can assure you that my hand is well trained and I rather picture your face in front of me while helping myself than risking everything I have for a quick number with someone I probably wouldn't even remember the name of afterwards. I can't force you to believe me but I can promise you that I have never cheated on you and never will. The thing we have is way too important to throw it all away. And no matter how happy I'm with my life on the road I'm certainly even happier whenever I'm coming back home to you."

You felt how a huge weigh was taken away from you. Of course you were still scared but you could hear the sincerity and honesty that was speaking from every word he was saying. You were smiling up at him as you said: "If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If it doesn't, than it was never meant to be. So I guess I will wait for you here until you decide that you want to retire. I love you Joe." He placed a tiny kiss on your lips as he replied: "I love you too Y/N, more than words can say. And I will always come back to you." And with that he lifted you up in order to carry you to the bedroom where he would continue what he had just started. He knew that he would find happiness not only on the road but first and foremost when he was back at home with you.