Disclaimer: You know the drill.
The New Bean Brigade #2
"El Tigre by the Tail."
To most people, Miracle City resembled a typical Mexican-style town. But the place was inhabited by not only normal citizens, but by assorted heroes and villains. And it was the latter that concerned a recent group of newcomers.
"There it is, Miracle City" Mad Jack addressed his teammates "if you can make it here, you can make it anywhere. Oh no wait, that's New York."
"How'd we get here, anyway?" Tolinator wondered.
"Remember, we used our new jet, the Legume One" Mad Jack reminded him "I would've preferred something more frightening, but Hannibal was in charge of picking the name."
"Are you sure we'll find some villains here?" Control Freak asked.
"Yes, according to Hannibal, this place has the highest villain to person rate in the world, next to the City of Townsville" Mad Jack explained "I'm not sure how they stay in business with so much crime though."
"I calculate the possibility of us finding a new member is extremely likely" Mather added.
"Well whoever we find has to be better than Camille" Charmcaster said "I don't know about you, but I couldn't stand that spoiled, self-absorbed brat. Hopefully we can find another female villain, but one with less personality flaws."
"But a huge rack!" CF added, eliciting a groan from the white-haired sorceress.
"Man, a place where super villains are allowed to roam free" Tolinator said, awestruck "that's the place for me. I wonder if I could get a summer home here."
"You'd have to have a home first bro, seriously" Motor Ed explained.
"I have one, it's just been foreclosed on" Tolinator explained.
"Discuss your living arrangements later" Mad Jack interrupted "we have evil to find."
Elsewhere in the city, young Manny Rivera was getting ready for school. He had no clue, however, that he and the Bean Brigade would soon cross paths.
"Manny, before you go to school, I have some wisdom of my own to impart on you" Rodolfo told him.
"What is it papi?"
"I think it is time for you to consider joining a group of some kind" Rodolfo said, "a group can offer you positive reinforcement that will help lead you on the path to becoming a great hero like me. When I was your age, I joined the Junior League, and what I learned with them eventually helped me on my way to becoming White Pantera. Do you understand what I am saying?"
"Si, but why did you have to tell me this now?" Manny asked.
"It seemed like the right time for some reason" Rodolfo replied "ooh, my toast is done. Well, off to school, don't want to be late, do you?"
"Si papi" Manny replied.
Manny soon arrived at the Leone Middle school and met up with his friend Frida Suarez.
"What's up Manny?"
"My papi was talking to me about the time he was part of a junior league when he was younger" Manny explained "he's trying to urge me to join a team like he did. He says it will help to develop my skills as a hero."
"Well if you join any group, you'd better see what kind of cool stuff they offer" Frida said.
"I don't think it's that simple" Manny replied.
"Yes it is" Frida told him "if you're going to join a group, they should have cool stuff, 'cause then you can get that stuff, and give it to your friends."
"Hmm…that actually makes sense" Manny said.
"Of course, it's the law of the world, or something" Frida said.
"Perhaps there is a club here at school I could join" Manny suggested.
"I don't know Manny, a lot of these school clubs are really lame" Frida replied.
"I don't care, I will join a club to impress my papi, this I swear!"
"Okay, but don't blame me if you don't get accepted."
Meanwhile, the Bean Brigade had congregated across the border in the town of Calavera, where all manner of unsavory characters hung out. In fact, they were in the process of interviewing one, using the same American Idol-type table that had been used for the earlier auditions.
"So, Senor El Oso" Mad Jack began "what can you bring to the Bean Brigade?"
He was talking to a large hairy man, with a bulbous nose and wearing a loincloth and a beanie that resembled a bear's head.
"Well, I can bring myself for one" El Oso replied "that's a little joke there. Seriously though, I'm like, super strong and whatever."
"And are you willing to shower?" Mad Jack asked.
"No way man, my smell is, like, part of my whole villain thing" El Oso replied.
"I see" Mad Jack replied "but besides your enhanced strength, and questionable hygiene, what else can you do?"
"Um…I don't know man" El Oso replied "nobody's ever asked me that before. Come to think of it, nobody asked me for a resume before either."
"Yes, and thanks so much for that" Mad Jack said, holding a dirty piece of paper covered with scribbles "before we make our decision, we'll have to see you in action."
"No problem, there's a bank around the corner I can rob" El Oso said "then I'll show you gringos that you need El Oso as part of your grape group."
"Bean Brigade" Mad Jack corrected him.
"Grapes, beans, they both give me gas" El Oso replied.
"I can't believe I was rejected by every club" Manny whined to Frida, outside the school. "Even the 'acceptance club' turned me down, and they accept everybody."
"I told you it wouldn't be easy" Frida said "you're not going to just find a group to join around the corner."
Just then, Manny heard the familiar sound of an alarm bell.
"Uh oh, trouble" he said "this looks like a job for…El Tigre!"
Spinning his belt buckle, he turned into his alter-ego of El Tigre.
"We'd better see what that disturbance is" he told Frida as he rushed out of the school.
"This has got to be better than going to class" Frida said, as she followed behind him.
Control Freak: Now that we're back, I thought I'd read some comments from our readers. This one is from supercoolrox45. "Dear Bean Brigade, you suck. You are the stupidest idea since Barney. I mean, a bunch of lame villains forming a group? That is so stupid. You can all eat…" Heh heh, this one must be a joke.
Motor Ed: Okay, here's one from some dude called awesomeman. "I luv the BB, wen are U guys going to make a Disney movie parody." Well dude, how about never, seriously.
CF: Yeah, the whole Disney movie parody thing is played out. Although, a Little Mermaid parody wouldn't be bad. I already know who would play Ariel.
(Charmcaster enters).
Charmcaster: Don't even think about it! There is no way I'm wearing a seashell bikini to satisfy the perverted desires of you and your Internet geek buddies! (leaves).
CF: So much for that. Anyway, villain-fun writes "I have an idea for someone to join the Bean Brigade; how about a villain from Ying Yang Yo, since they have so many lame ones?" That's a possibility, I guess, I do like Saranoia.
Motor Ed: We'll have more fan messages later. In our next rocking chapter, we watch that punk El Tigre in action and decide to recruit him, seriously.
CF: But what happens when he has to fight his father? If you want to find out…
Both: Read & Review!
Also, if anyone out there who knows a lot about El Tigre wants to help out, feel free to e-mail me. I promise to give you writing credit.
