AN: Forgive my angsty self once again, but I have brought forth another one of these tragic little stories. PruHun. Hints of AusHun. Erzsebet's point of view. Silence could be the most deadliest thing when you watch your one and only sunshine fall to his knees in agony without any words coming from his lips as you could feel his glowing presence begin to fade. (P.S. Keep tissues in hand, just in case.)
I would never forget that morning I woke up to find myself in his bed. There were sheets tangled around our bodies and I could hear his heart beat steadily in his chest. There were no other words to describe what it felt to be in his arms the way I was then, our bodies seemed to be made for one another to hold close and I couldn't be any happier. I wished that the morning would never end because I knew what was awaiting us this day. I hated this day, February twenty-fifth, nineteen forty-seven, and I would continue to hate it for the rest of my life. Roderich had told me all about the Allies' plans to make Prussia disappear forever with a disgusting word such as dissolution. I knew it was bound to happen one day, but I thought I had more time and when Roderich had told me, I was absolutely devastated. I did not need to say it out loud, for the piano player already knew about my unrequited feelings for him and Roderich let me go that night to be with the man I should have been with all along.
I remember how brightly he smiled at me that morning, how happy he was to realize it had not just been some dream. I held onto him a little bit tighter out of fear of losing him and he noticed this. Gilbert held me close to his chest and buried his face into my neck, showering me in kisses. I wanted to cry, but I kept a strong lip and I returned his actions of love with earnest, knowing this would be the last time I felt his warmth. His intoxicating glow that had me move closer to be up against my sunshine, to feel him radiating against my skin one last time. I would never feel his hands caress me as they did that morning, nor would I ever feel his strong lips against my skin. I looked out the window and I saw the clouds begin to roll in and cover up the morning rays that had only begun to spill out.
"Liz, I have a meeting today and I want you to come with me. I think the Allies are going to forgive all the wrong that my brother and I have done, maybe then we can have our chance. I can take you away from old Roddy and you can start a new life with me. Wouldn't that be great? What do you say Lizzie?" He smiled at me as he sat up and kissed my hands. I couldn't deny him now and I should be there with him when it happens, I didn't want him to be surrounded by those men alone while they announced it to him and I wanted to hold onto him until his very last breath.
"Of course, Gilbert," I smiled at him weakly as he got up to dress in his best uniform yet and I dressed myself in the dress I had worn last night. How appropriate it was for it to be black because I was in mourning, but the red skirt wouldn't give it away to his beautiful mind. We walked hand in hand to the office and that is how I ended up at his side before the other Allies. I could already feel the tears coming as I watched Francis approach us with a grim expression on his work worn face. The other men were seated at a large table and their heads were bowed in shame for what they were about to do to their long time friend and sometimes foe.
"Gilbert, it is our intention here today to officially disband the Empire of Prussia. The blame falls on you for the World War that your brother and the rest of the Axis partook in, now it is time to rid ourselves of the past to begin a new future," Francis choked out the last part as he attempted to keep his composure in front of his dear friend. I felt Gilbert's grip on my hand tighten as his jaw dropped when he watched a document being passed around to be signed by all of the Allies. Francis' hand shook as he wrote his name first on the document and I watched Gilbert fall to his knees. A silent scream broke through his lips and tears began to fall down his cheeks as one after the other signed the page. I burst into tears myself as I had to watch him being tortured with every flick of the pen against paper, I could almost feel his pain that was being caused by the others. I wanted to scream at them to stop, but I knew it would be pointless.
I slipped down on the ground beside him and blood began pouring out of his mouth, there was nothing left for me to do, but to cradle him against my chest. His blood began staining my dress when the last signature was signed and his eyes rolled into the back of his head. I cried freely in front of the other's, sobbing and the men watched with heads bowed lower in their own mourning. I felt as if I couldn't breathe when I closed his eyes and let him rest in my arms. I cupped Gilbert's cheek gently and kissed his bloodied lips one last time, the metallic taste making me feel sick. Arthur stood and tried to pull me away from his body, but I broke my way free from his grip before holding onto the Prussian tighter. The Englishman retreated and went to comfort Francis who had begun to cry silently.
The other Allies had backed off from the scene as guilt had made them regret everything they had ever done which led them up to this fate. A fallen empire, something once so glorious was now covered in his own blood with his murderers nearby. My sobs grew louder as I mourned my love, my precious love who had given me so much without realizing it. I wish we could have spent more time together, I wish I could have been married to him instead of the Austrian. Fate was cruel to us and I prayed to God that Gilbert would be in heaven waiting for me, should I ever die. I cursed being immortal out loud which came out like choked sobs and reminded my ownself of a child who had their favorite toy snatched from them. Gilbert was no toy to be played with, but he was snatched from me by people who thought they knew it all. To put the blame on an already weakening empire was revolting enough and immoral. Had they no respect for the falling and the powerful?
I thought back to all the memories we shared, all the times we could have had together and all the time wasted on petty thing such as treaties and wars. Those endless days in the fields with feasts of apples and roasted rabbits. When the skies were clear and there was nothing for us children to worry about. The Allies were compelled to stay in that room with me despite the fact that they had been the ones to destroy it all for us. I couldn't stop myself now as I held onto him tighter, my tears spilling out onto his uniform and I rocked his limp body in my arms. At this point I was gasping for breath and my tears had blurred my vision to the point where I could barely see his face. I began to sing quietly, almost inaudibly, but I am sure the other's heard me.
"You were my Sunshine, my only Sunshine. You made me happy when skies were gray. You'll never know dear, how much I love you. They took my sunshine away." I emphasized the last part as my head snapped up to glared at each one individually for taking away my Sunshine. He was my only escape, my only strength. I would have died without him there and now that he is gone, I will die a little each day until we can be reunited. I took his hand in mine and I pressed his fingers to my lips as my tears ceased to fall from my cheeks. I stood up and let his body lie on the floor. I crossed his arms over his chest and placed the flower from my hair over his hands before marching over to the Frenchman and grabbing him by the collar.
"Mademoiselle Hedevary!" He exclaimed as I brought his face inches away from mine.
"You listen here, Francis. I want him to have a proper burial with his other fallen comrades, do you hear me? It is the least you can do after all you have done to your only close companion besides Arthur." I tried to keep my face still and I took deep breaths to keep myself from crying once again. The pain I felt aching deep within myself made it hard to even think as I felt like someone had ripped out my beating heart from my chest. My Gilbert was gone and I would make them all pay for the pain they caused me and the life that they had taken from my beloved. One by one I will make them suffer for what they did to him, to me and more importantly what they did to us.
"Of course," He replied solemnly as I walked right out of the office and I ran despite how much I wanted to go back and stay with his body. I felt the rain slowly drenching me until I approached Gilbert's home and I quickly went inside and began to sob once again. I blindly made my way through the hallways and into his bedroom where we had spent the night drowning ourselves in affection. I could still smell his scent as I layed down on the bed and wrapped myself in his blankets.
Three days passed and I barely moved from my place on the bed. I do not remember the last time I ate or the time of day it was. The world was just as cold as it was the day I held him in my arms for that last time. Everything was just as dark and it seemed that it was only growing darker in this lonely house. Roderich had stopped by yesterday to make sure I hadn't done anything irrational. After he saw that I was in satisfactory health he left without even embracing me once. Of course he felt no remorse for his fallen enemy nor would anyone feel it as much as they should. The blame game from our childhood has gone too far for any of this to seem real. I feel as if I'm walking around aimlessly in a dream world that will cease to exist with one wrong move. I wish I had more time with him, maybe then I wouldn't be here wallowing in my self misery.
I am just as much to blame as the Allies, we all contributed to his death and no one noticed that every day, even before the war, that he was slowly dying. I should have saved him. I should have married him instead of Roderich, but my boss would not have allowed it. He was too unstable and Roderich had it all. Fate has been cruel to us, so very cruel and it made me knees go weak. I walked through the empty house and I collapsed on the bed again and cried out weakly until I heard heavy footsteps down the hall. It was Ludwig, no doubt. I sat up and looked at the figure with my now blurred vision. The body didn't seem like Ludwig's which confused me until I heard a familiar raspy voice speak.
"Liz, what the hell are you doing? Who made you cry like this?" Gilbert questioned and I sobbed harder. A ghost coming to haunt me and torture me for not telling him sooner. I could have screamed out in agony, but the Prussian moved closer and held my trembling form tightly, his body felt so real to me.
"Why do you haunt me now?" I cried into his shoulder and I felt as if I was slowly losing my grip on reality. I watched him die, I held him while he laid limply in my arms and now here he was. A long white dress shirt fluttered around his frame and high white pants were worn just as they were when he was alive. His face seemed to be glowing with a strange type of warmth that was not like the warmth I was use to.
"What are you talking about, Erzsebet?" He looked at me with concern as he tilted my chin up and kissed both of my cheeks. He seemed so alive to me, but something was very different about him and about the way he was presented. I had never witnessed the death of a fallen country nor have I ever spoken to anyone who had passed before. I questioned whether this was real or some sick joke that fate was playing on me. It had to be fate, fate was what caused all of this and by my God in heaven I could not go in life like this.
"I watched you. I held you when..." I trailed off unable to speak the word aloud, not even to this representation of him for it was too vulgar of language to say to anyone. Gilbert laughed, holding me closer as he nuzzled his face into my hair again. I could not feel his heartbeat and that made me feel cold inside. Did I hear him laughing? Whatever ghost or demon or even angel this was made me feel even more hopeless in my current situation. I was lost in a world of emotions that made me feel dizzy, maybe even a little sick to my stomach now.
"It takes a lot more than a piece of paper to kill me, you should know better than that Liz." He teased me faintly with a wide grin and I stared up at him in confusion. This was not possible, a ghost that I am talking to is making me think I am crazy. Leave it to Gil to come back from the underworld just to tick me off.
"What are you talking about Gilbert?" I asked him with exasperation, sighing when he pulled away from me and stood up. The Prussian began to pace the floor, making me anxious and causing me to nervously play with my hair.
"I don't really know how to explain it. I thought I was a goner when I started coughing and I remember the taste of blood. Everything went black and then I saw Louise in this bright light behind her. She smiled at me and I bowed before her out of respect of course. She tapped my shoulders with a sword, as if she was knighting me again and then all my clothes faded to white. I started feeling as if I was falling and everything went black again. I woke up in the office where they signed that Goddamned paper, but my body wasn't there. I went looking for you, but you were nowhere to be found. I figured you just went back to Roderich's, so I decided to come back home and here you are." He spoke calmly as he told me about the rest of his experience with an almost childish excitement in his eyes and he knelt before me.
"What does this all mean? What are you?" I asked and I could feel my heart racing in my chest as he rested his head in my lap. I reached out to touch his hair and I found that it was softer than I remember.
"Lousie mentioned something about being frozen in time. Not like how the other nations are, but I'm literally frozen. I don't have a heartbeat anymore, Liz. My blood is just at a stand still...and I fucking smell like flowers." Gilbert frowned and wrinkled his nose, but all I could do was laugh and tears of happiness rolled down my cheeks.
"I don't care if you smell like a field of roses, you're here and that is all that matters now." I held his face in my hands and I kissed his lips. Maybe fate wasn't so cruel, maybe everything worked out as it was suppos-
"Mademoiselle Hedevary! It's Gilbert, 'is body has gone miss-" Francis stopped mid sentence after entering the room abruptly. Gilbert and I looked at him, his frail body seemed unable to even carry his own weight now as we watched him faint. I sighed, standing up to walk over to his body and take him out to the couch. He was much lighter than I remember, I noted before setting him down and going back into the room where the Prussian had kicked off his boots and laid down in the bed. He wasn't sleeping, he seemed to just be resting his head and I curled up next to his side.
Yes, everything does work out the way it is suppose to and maybe life had given me a lesson I had to learn. There was no way of describing how much I appreciated the feeling of him by my side after three days of thinking I would never see him again and now he was here by my side, where he always should have been. We had survived yet another World War and that finalized my decision officially to break away from Roderich. Now I will be with the one who I was truly meant to be with all along. Maybe fate isn't so cruel, maybe fate works on it's own time. I pushed all thoughts aside for the night and burrowed under the pillows with my love. He started singing as I fell asleep and I could hear his rumbling voice just by laying my head on his chest.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray, you'll never know dear how much I love you," he stopped singing and placed his gently lips against my temple. "They will never take your sunshine away."
AN: So, yeah. Done, ish. Reviews are greatly appreciated ^^
