Anything for You

Summary: Back! With angst, sorry, lol. Due to interest and me realizing it was cruel to leave off Prompt 21 (Stay with Me) where I did, I'm turning it into t a full fic. Takes place early Season 6 after a failed delivery. TW: death, blood, violence.

A/N: This fic is EXTREMELY angsty, but I 100% promise that I will NOT be killing anyone off. I couldn't do that. So, if you're worried about reading because of character death, fear not! Also, Chapter 1 is just Prompt 21. The new material starts in Chapter 2 and I will try to updated on a weekly basis!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.


Chapter 1

"How is he?"

Sister Julienne didn't have to say who. Somehow all of Nonnatus knew that Patrick hadn't come home until 5am covered in blood and sweat and with an absent look in his eyes.

"He's coping." said Shelagh sadly.

"No one blames him, you know." Sister Julienne assured.

"I know." Shelagh sighed. "I just wish he didn't blame himself."

"No one handles the loss of a mother and child well, but I think it's affected him more since Marianne passed." said Sister Julienne. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to-"

"It's alright Sister," Shelagh smiled, "Patrick and I have talked a lot about her and I don't mind. Besides, you're not wrong about him. South Africa did us both a world of good, but I think he still worries about doing more harm than help."

"Is he coming into the clinic today?" she asked.

"I told him not to, but he seemed determined this morning, so we'll have to see I suppose." replied Shelagh. "If he seems like he's not doing well, I'll take him home."

"I don't want you to over exert yourself either." Sister Julienne said affectionately with a glance down to Shelagh's now-swelling stomach.

"I won't." Shelagh smiled. "Baby has actually been quite well behaved since last night. I think he knows we need a bit of peace."

"He?" Sister Julienne questioned.

"Just a feeling." Shelagh shrugged as she sorted through the list of patients due to come in momentarily.

Sister Julienne smiled and shook her head. Sister Bernadette would've told Shelagh she couldn't possibly know the baby's gender, but then again, Sister Bernadette wouldn't be having this baby. So much had changed over the past few years, but looking at the young woman before her, Sister Julienne wouldn't have it any other way. Her daughter had come so far and her family was truly blessed.

The doors opened and both women looked up to see Patrick walk in with a haunted look in his eyes.

"Oh, Shelagh, he's in no fit state-" Sister Julienne started, but Shelagh was already walking towards her husband.

"Patrick, love," she gently grabbed his shoulder, "you don't have to be here."

"Yes I do." he argued. "I can't sit at home all day just thinking about it."

"But, darling-"

"Please, Shelagh. I promise if I can't handle it, I'll let you know. It won't be like last time. I've lost patients during childbirth before." he swore.

Shelagh sighed. She knew she wouldn't changed his mind and they had come a long way since his last breakdown. She needed to trust that he would let her know when he needed her.

"Alright." she acquiesced with a quick kiss to his cheek.

Sister Julienne gave her a questioning look when she returned to the intake table, but she shook her head. As much as she didn't like it, she understood Patrick's need to work and she would let him be as long as she could.

Half way through clinic, Patrick was actually faring much better. The patients were happy to see him and there hadn't been any catastrophes. Patsy had been the attending midwife the previous night and Shelagh was sure seeing her at work at the clinic was also motivating Patrick to be strong as well. She admired Nurse Mount and was secretly glad Patrick had been working with her during the loss rather than one of the more emotional nurses.

Shelagh saw him walk to kitchen to take a break and took the opportunity to check on him. Walking in behind him, she softly laughed as his hand habitually reached for the cigarette case that was no longer in his coat pocket and then sighed dejectedly.

"You didn't think it was funny a year ago." he said wryly.

"It's not my fault it's harder for you to quit than me." she teased as she held out a biscuit for him instead. "How are you feeling?"

"Better, actually." he affirmed. "Things are going well today."

"Yes, they are." she agreed.

"How are you feeling?" he asked in turn with a glance to her stomach.

"I couldn't feel better, Patrick." she beamed. "I feel as if everything is slowly falling into place again."

"Even with Sister Ursula running amok with your filing system?" he asked with a smirk.

"I said slowly, dear." she rolled her eyes. "I'm glad to see you're clearly cheering up, even if it is at my expense."

"Never at your expense, my love." he smiled cheekily and pulled her in for a kiss.

"Doctor Turner?!" a slightly slurred voice bellowed through the hall. "Where is Doctor Turner?!"

Shelagh and Patrick looked at each other in confusion and quickly made their way into the main clinic room to find it silent except for the one, yelling voice. Patrick saw the man the voice belonged to and suddenly he wasn't alright at all. Arthur Cartwright, husband and father of the previous night's casualties, stood drunk and fuming before the entrance to the clinic.

"Mr. Cartwright." Patrick spoke evenly. "You shouldn't be here."

"No, you shouldn't be here!" he barked. "How can you lot trust him when he's a killer?"

"Mr. Cartwright, you're drunk." Patrick tried to reason. "You're hurting and you need to go home."

"I have nothing at home because of you and that girl." he spat, indicating Patsy.

The mothers throughout the clinic instinctively tried to gather their children, but it only angered him.

"Don't move!" he shouted.

"Don't you threaten them, they didn't do anything!" Patrick snapped as he walked towards Mr. Cartwright. Shelagh paled as she saw the crazed man reach for his pants pocket.

"Patrick, stop!" she screamed at the same time Mr. Cartwright drew the gun he'd stolen from his brother's ship and pointed it at Patrick.

The entire room seized with tension and Shelagh clenched her hand against her stomach.

"Arthur," Patrick spoke slowly and calmly despite the rapid beating of his heart, "you don't want to do this. Killing me won't bring them back."

He saw Mr. Cartwright's gaze flit to the left towards Shelagh and instantly, Patrick knew he'd said the wrong thing.

"I know. I don't want to kill you. I want you to know what it feels like to lose them." Arthur grimaced.

"No!" Patrick wasn't even aware of his body moving. All he saw was the split second it took for Mr. Cartwright to point the gun at Shelagh and then all he felt was gut-wrenching pain rip through his side as he threw himself in front of her and their unborn child.

"Patrick!" Shelagh screamed as she threw herself to the floor beside him.

"Police!" Barbara had managed to sneak out at grab the nearest constable, but it was too little too late. The constable immediately apprehended Arthur Cartwright, who didn't even struggle he was so shocked that he'd actually pulled the trigger.

Around her, Shelagh barely heard the chaos of yelling and running. She thought she heard someone shout for an ambulance, but she couldn't be sure. Her entire world had closed in on the man she loved and how she knew in the back of her head that she needed to keep pressure on his side even though the warm blood against her hands made her want to wretch.

"Patrick, please." she cried. "Please stay with me. I love you. We love you."

She felt his hand squeeze against hers as he fought to hold onto consciousness.

"Won't...leave…you…" he forced out before he let himself be taken under. The pain was too great to handle, but he would see her again in the hospital when he woke up. He had to. He had to stay with her.


New material starts next chapter! Thank you for reading!