Title: Fools rush in
Characters/Pairings: Ron/Andy friendship, Ron/Diane
Word Count: ~600
Rating: PG
Spoiler alert: Written post season 4 finale "Are You Better Off?"
Summary: Ron's life is pretty static. But at some point, he became friends with Andy.
A/N: Written in less than an hour. Couldn't get it out of my head. My Parks and Rec fanfic virginity is gone! No edits, so it's probably filled with errors. I might fix that one day. Maybe.

Also, Ron Swanson's characterization terrifies me. Comments would be lovely.


Ron Swanson's always thought that his life was pretty uneventful. The past year in particular had no surprises. And he his perfectly all right with that. In his mind, this year was a success because he is not any worse off than before. Which is what he tells Andy when he comes and sits in his office looking for some sort of guidance.

Ron isn't quite sure when that became a regular occurrence. And when did Andy even manage to find himself under his wing?

(Ron doesn't even like that saying. It's ridiculous. Men don't have wings. And the implication that it would somehow benefit an ailing bird to be hidden away under anther's wing is even more ridiculous. That wouldn't solve anything at all. It just puts the healthy bird at risk because now it has to deal with the others incompetency.)

But never mind that.

He supposes that Andy never had exposure to a real male relationship as a child, and as a result lasks proper skills. And he overcompensates every relationship by being a child. He's almost thirty. He needs to grow up some day. Ron's there to guide his way. Andy started off as an annoying pest who had wormed his way into his life. He was that unfortunate soul who had the audacity to live in a pit and think that it would somehow get him his girlfriend back.

Andy barely had the skills to survive in the wild. It is a miracle he lived as long as he did in that pit.

Since then, he has asked Ron to teach him basic wildlife survival. "In case of a zombie apocalypse, I want to be able to take care of me and April."

Because if Ron can make the world a better place by getting rid of somebody's ignorance he'll do it

Somewhere down the line, Andy started to become a fixture in his office. Somewhere down the line, Ron stopped pressing the button to slam the doors in his face. It was such a gradual thing, Ron didn't even realize it until it was too late and God forbid he actually liked talking to Andy about personal things.

Andy is currently sitting in the seat across from him and they are having a good adult discussion about being better off because well... Leslie is on this new kick and it wormed its way into everyone's life. Much like everything else she does. Or cares about.

Andy is definitely better off than he was a year ago. He's gone to college. Got some sort of direction.

Ron's life has stayed static. He still has the same job. The same house. The same cabin in the woods. The same old moustache.

(Well, he does begrudgingly admit to himself that a little over a year ago, he remarried the devil. But nobody is allowed to talk about that. And it was over a year ago, so moot point.)

Within the last year, nothing significant has happened. Ron Swanson likes being content. He hates boat rocking.

Ron listens to Andy go on about a pregnancy in the trash. Ron isn't really following. Andy says something about not having figured it out. He has eliminated all the possibilities. Ron is about to ask for clarification because when his office door flies open, and the biggest change in his life comes rushing in.

"Hi, Honey!" he says. A smile instantly plasters itself on his face. "What are you doing here?"

Diane.

He hadn't really thought much about it. Everything else in his life is pretty static and he is content with that. Or at least it seemed like it. Much like his relationship with Andy, it just snuck up on him.

Happiness.