Rokudaime Hokage
by candy crushed

Summary: Hinata had once said, "Everyone wants to be hokage." But who will be the one who actually becomes hokage? konoha11fun!
Rating: T - for one swear word potty mouth Uchiha says.
Warning: Neji's death plays a role (somewhat) in this story. It's not angst, and it's pretty mild, but if you're still licking your wounds (I am) I'd say you beware.
Usage of basic japanese. Nothing too hard to understand.


The Fourth Great Ninja War solved itself, really, and relatively fast, too. Tobi - or as he now prefers to go by: Obito - surrendered as soon as possible when he got attacked by Naruto's talk-no-jutsu. Sure, he had been living the R-rated (Rin, rage and revenge) lifestyle for the past two decades or so, but once Naruto mentioned the large gardening space and stray rabid bunnies in Konoha, Obito was all for saving his village. So Naruto and co. (including the newly-recruited Obito) took out the juubi and the remaining Zetsu clones, deactivated the Edo-Tensei and replanted the cabbages, it was going well for everyone who had survived.

Except Tsunade.

Piles of paperwork were stacked on her desk each day, each sheet asking for approval on new reconstruction plans or food rations. She tiredly picked her head up from the smooth mahogany wooden writing table she borrowed from some dead family's house (because her old desk got blown up along with the Hokage tower and a certain blond kid thought it be cool to show off his new kicks to his long-lost best friend) and roughly scanned through the papers.

Beads of perspiration appeared on her forehead as she went through the documents. She weakly gripped the sake bottle and let herself consume every last drop of the alcohol. Her eyes closed, she wiped her mouth. "I'm done."


There was a general meeting every morning from 10 in the morning to noon, held in an empty field with a makeshift wooden stage in the middle. It involved every villager above the age of 12 and an assortment of ninja pets. As hokage, Tsunade would be on the stage, droning on about the reconstruction progress and the steady climb of the economy and village politics then disappear into the canvas tent set up next to the stage to get some more alcohol to drink. The Rookie Nine (plus Tenten and Lee) would usually go for lunch right after, to discuss the village's future and interior design.

One day, however, Tsunade had a very special announcement to make.

"Shut up, everyone!" Tsunade slurred loudly into the microphone and the villagers fell silent, wide eyed, almost immediately. Tsunade was drunk... again. "I'm not hokage."

Everyone gasped, except Shino and Sasuke, but they were really close to gasping, too. Chatter started among the villagers.

"Ha! I knew it!" Naruto yelled at the godaime, pointing an accusing finger at the blonde woman. "The real Tsunade-baachan would never have disapproved my petition to have more ramen stands rebuilt!"

A vein popped, and Tsunade resisted the urge to sink her fists into the ground. "No, that's not it," she said carefully, her arms locked stiffly at her sides. "I've resigned."

Everyone gasped again. The Uchiha and the Aburame stayed silent, however.

"Candidates for the next hokage will be released tomorrow! Villagers get a special say in this one, since we have just been through a war. Consider this a parting gift." Tsunade raised an arm in goodbye and stumbled off the stage, Shizune on her arm.

The Rookie Nine and what was left of Team Gai walked in twos and threes towards the only barbeque restaurant rebuilt in Konoha. It was Chouji's turn to pick the food today, and everyone had groaned loudly in protest, but headed in that direction anyway.

Naruto, Sakura and Lee led the way, as they were the loudest ones in the group. The quiet ones - Shino, Hinata and Sasuke - hung back, while the rest of the walked in between the two groups, idly making small talk about the weather.

It was a big surprise when a deadpan voice was heard from the back the back of the group.

"I'm going to be hokage."

Everyone stopped abruptly to whip their heads towards the sound of the voice. "Sa... suke?" Ino said uncertainly. "Are you okay?"

It had been the Uchiha who spoke, because he decided no one was paying him enough attention. Nevertheless, he was dead serious about what he said. He didn't bother to reply to Ino, however. "Tomorrow," he said, "my name will be on the list of worthy candidates, and I expect all of you to support me."

Everyone gaped at him, too stunned to speak. The restaurant was just forty odd steps away, but no one moved - not even Chouji. Naruto was first to recover.

"No way, teme!" he shouted, pointing at his broad chest. "I'm going to be hokage!"

Sasuke turned his head away arrogantly. "Che. Dobe."

"Shut up!" Kiba roared. "I'm the perfect hokage candidate!"

Sasuke, Shino and Naruto snorted at the same time. "Right," Naruto said sarcastically.

"It's true, alright!" Kiba shouted back. "I'm strong, I have Akamaru as a helper -"

Shikamaru rolled his eyes. "You're supposed to be the hokage, not your dog."

"- and I'm a guy!" Kiba went on ignoring Shikamaru.

"Hey!" Tenten, Ino and Sakura yelled in fury at the blatant sexist remark.

Hinata squeaked.

"I'm going to be hokage!" Ino screeched loudly. "No one's stopping me!"

"Right, Ino-pig," Sakura said sardonically. "And exactly what are your qualifications? Being stupid? Baka."

"Be quiet!" Ino sniffed. "I'm beautiful -"

Everyone coughed.

"- intelligent -"

A sneeze.

"- and I'm part of the well-known Ino-Shika-Cho trio!"

"I know how to appreciate enthusiastic youth energy, Ino-chan," Lee said, shaking his head, "but only one can be hokage. All three of the Ino-Shika-Cho can't be hokage, so that leaves me, the most youthful disciple of Gai-sensei, as the most suitable candidate!"

A loud pinging of teeth was heard all across Konoha. Gai-sensei sneezed.

Everyone hesitated, before bursting out laughing. Even Shino let out a low chuckle and Sasuke giggled (manly) a bit.

"Sorry, guys," Shikamaru butted in, "it's troublesome to fight, but I'm going to be hokage."

"You?" Sakura said incredulously.

"Yes, me. It is the most strategic way to avoid missions and I can watch clouds all day. Besides, I have good ties with Suna."

Tenten rolled her eyes. "You mean you're dating the Kazekage's sister."

He shrugged. "Same difference."

"Baka!" Naruto screamed. "That's not what being hokage is about! You have to protect the -"

Hinata shuffled her feet, her face blazing red, as she opened her mouth to speak. "Ano... Naruto-kun, I - I want to be h-hokage, too!"

"Hinata?" Tenten said curiously. "Since when you...?"

"It will make otou-san proud," she mentioned serenely.

They let out an understanding "Ahh."

"Sorry to destroy your dreams, Hinata-chan," Sakura piped up. "But I'm going to be hokage."

"Aa..." Hinata trailed off, looking embarrassed.

"I don't think that'll work out, Sakura," Tenten said sympathetically, placing a hand on her shoulder almost as if she understood.

"Why the hell not?" the pink-haired kunoichi huffed indignantly, shaking Tenten's hand off.

Sai stopped near the original Konoha 11. "Ugly hag," he smiled and nodded at Sakura before walking off.

"Annoying," Sasuke contributed off-handedly.

"Billboard brow," Ino staged whispered.

Sakura growled and stomped her foot, a mini crater formed at her beneath her ninja sandal.

Chouji munched on his chips thoughtfully. "I'm the best choice. Face it," he said, the crisps crunching loudly in his mouth.

"Right..." they all mumbled, not wanting to offend the Akimichi.

Chouji's face fell. "It's because I'm fat, isn't it?"

Naruto laughed nervously, his hands raised in defense. "No, no, of course not, Chouji. We would never call you fat."

They all muttered something similar under their breaths and no one spoke for a while, the air tense. It wasn't until Tenten brandished a vicious-looking kunai from her waist pouch that they all moved. "I'm becoming hokage," she smiled as she swung the kunai. Everyone unconsciously took a few steps back.

"Tch," Sasuke said, sneering. "You can only fight far-ranged and with weapons. That's not very practical if the enemy was a Hyuuga. That's why I -"

"S-Sasuke-kun, that's not very nice," Hinata stammered, trying to defend Tenten and the Hyuuga name. "We Hyuuga would n-never become the enemy..."

He snorted. "Your cousin Nini-face or something is the epitome of the word 'enemy'."

"Neji's dead, Sasuke," Shikamaru deadpanned.

"Oh."

Lee started to sob, and Tenten looked pretty shaken up, too. "I'm going to become hokage! For Neji!" Lee cried, tears and snot streaming down his face like a dam had broken somewhere within.

Naruto's lower lip was trembling, and tears had welled up in Hinata's eyes, threatening to spill over. Ino and Sakura looked at the ground, while Chouji stopped eating in respect for their lost comrade and Shikamaru had the decency to look sad.

Meanwhile, Shino blended in with the trees somewhere in the thickets in Konoha, abandoned by his so-called friends. "My favourite colour is moss green," he whispered to himself. "Why? Because..."

Sasuke looked at his sorrowful almost-friends and felt a twinge of guilt hit him hard. He ran his fingers through his already-tousled hair, his silky raven locks sticking up even more at the back. "Ah, fuck," he said.


They all went for the barbeque lunch that afternoon, and the afternoon after, too. At first, the lot didn't feel like eating because Lee had began telling them about how Neji was the brightest star in his eye (next to Gai-sensei) and the most-curved hips ("-after Hinata," he added, which made the girl blush). Hell, Lee was so passionate about his pale-eyed teammate he almost made Sasuke feel bad for bringing him up.

Almost.

They decided to skip the general meeting that day, when they met up 15 minutes before the meeting started, as usual. But when Tenten choked up suddenly and whispered hoarsely, her voice cracking, that Neji would've wanted to become hokage too, was when they decided to pay their respects to Neji instead.

By eating a lot of food.

Sasuke paid, of course. Naruto and Sakura had guilt-tripped him so bad he actually suggested they dine in the fancy Western restaurant that the shinobi rarely visited because of its overpriced food. His eyes bulged when he noticed the stacks of plates piled in front of Chouji after their meal.

He should've known better than to have believed his teammates. Really.

Strangely, none of them noticed their missing bug friend, who was waiting for them at the meeting venue, all alone with his hands in his pockets, trying to look casual as little kids passed him and stage whispered to their mothers about the creepy ojii-san.

Shino felt tears in his eyes.


The ten of them decided to take a nice, sunset-backdrop stroll through Konoha, with the quiet ones at the back, the loud and obnoxious ones in front, and the whatever ones in between.

Aburame Shino was not included. Again.

Surprisingly, they met Obito at the small patch of empty land near the hokage tower. He was on his knees, humming, his hands busy digging holes then carefully placing little sprouts into them. He smiled happily as he worked, his gloved hands patting the freshly dug soil, carefully as to not destroy ant nests and worm holes.

"Obito!" Naruto yelled, even though they were just thirty centimeters away. "What are you doing?"

"Gardening," Obito smiled. Shikamaru rolled his eyes, No shit. Everyone else just hung back, feeling terribly awkward, because none of them were really close to Obito and neither had a green thumb (except for Sasuke - gardening is in the Uchiha blood.)

"I'm going to be hokage!" Naruto proclaimed, as if the entire village had never put up with this for the past decade or so.

Obito's undamaged eye curved into a cresent and he smiled, but somewhat sympathetically, as if he knew something Naruto did not. "Good luck, then."

"Thanks, Obito old man!"


Anko took over as the news woman ever since Tsunade's resignation, and now she makes the announcements. There wasn't any news regarding the hokage nomination for the rest of the week, but on the bright side, bacon prices were lowering and Sakura's favourite brand of strawberry jam was now sold in bottles of 500 grams instead of 345 grams.

Finally, Anko revealed that the council has come to a final decision after long hours of calculation and splitting headaches. "The winner - ah, the hokage, I mean - will be announced soon. Please be seated as we, um, do some... official... things." Anko hurried off the stage and into the canvas tent.

The ten shinobi glanced at each other, individually hoping that they're the ones who would be made hokage.

Again, Shino's absence wasn't detected.

Everyone started chattering excitedly, looking about, hoping to spot the future rokudaime hokage. Out of nowhere, Kakashi sneaked up on the eleven shinobi, with Sai in tow, causing Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke to jump.

"Kaka-sensei!" Naruto shouted, his hand on his left breast. "Don't do that!"

Naruto's friends who were not on Team 7 awkwardly mumbled incoherent sentences and shuffled off, looking for their respective genin sensei. Sasuke twitched and Sakura glared.

"The meeting's almost coming to an end," Sakura muttered, still furious with Kakashi. "You're late!"

"Oh?" the masked man said lightly. "I thought I saw the ghost of my father on my way here, so I followed it. Turns out it was just a plastic bag." He smiled and scratched the back of his head.

Sasuke sniffed, and attempted to hide his curiosity as he spoke the following words. "I'm sure you have some idea on who's going to be rokudaime hokage?"

Kakashi chuckled. "Yes, I do, actually. The council actually asked for my opinion on this one, and personally I thought it was a splendid choice."

Sakura peered up at her sensei. "Really? Who is it?"

"I'm very sure Naruto knows him well."

Sasuke and Sakura looked at each other briefly, and then looked at Naruto. Naruto, instead, looked grief-stricken. "I - I'm not hokage?" he asked.

"We'll see." In a puff of smoke, Kakashi disappeared into thin air.

Just then, the clacking of Anko's heels was heard and everyone looked up expectantly. On the stage was an odd box, large enough to fit three to four Akimichis. Glitter covered its surface and there were a lot of Zac Efron stickers plastered onto its doors.

Anko strutted over to the microphone, fingering the smooth, white envelope in her hand. "All right," she said, "the result's in here." She slid her sharp index fingernail into the envelope and tore it open. She took out the parchment inside, flipping it open carefully. Everyone inhaled.

"The rokudaime hokage is..." she paused, building suspense and tension that was as thick as Plexiglas."Teuchi! A round of applause for this marvelous man, everyone!"

From the cupboard box thing, walked out the elderly Teuchi-san, or he is more commonly known as 'the Ichiraku ramen guy'. He raised his hand and took a bow, smiling away.

Everyone's jaw dropped to the ground, even the ever-so-stoic Uchiha Sasuke's.

"And his two assistants are," Anko continued, "his daughter Ayame and this handsome boy, Aburame Shino!"

Ayame walked out of the closet next, smiling and waving, while Shino made his way out like a mannequin zombie afraid of ruining his nails, his expression similar to a tree's.

Hinata and Kiba watched on, wondering why Teuchi-san chose Shino and why Shino never told them - I mean, they were his teammates! Hinata sighed and closed her eyes; she would be happy for Shino.

Lee and Tenten had a wild flame dancing in their eyes, fists clenched as they tried to stop thinking about how it could have easily been Neji. He was the first one to become jounin, after all. A lone tear rolled down Lee's cheek.

Team Ten had their mouths hanging open, and one would prefer not to peer into Chouji's mouth. "Is- Is that Shino?" Ino sputtered. The two boys just shook their heads, just as mystified as she was.

Team Seven - nicknamed Team Hokage by the villagers during the war - was in shock. Teuchi? Was he even a shinobi? Sasuke has never felt so inferior to someone - not even when he almost died at the hands of Killer B - and especially not to a man who makes ramen of all things for a living! He bit his cheek as his left eye twitched oddly, his jaw jumping.

Sakura had already known her chances of being hokage were low, with people like Naruto and Sasuke around, and knowing she lost to an old man she wasn't even sure could do a simple henge technique was not at all self-esteem boosting. "Am I really that weak?" she whispered sadly.

Naruto just sobbed and sobbed, wanting to vow not to never ever go to the Ichiraku's again, but couldn't make himself do it.

"From today, these will be your leaders!"

"Ramen on the house!" Teuchi shouted happily into the microphone, grinning, his eyes crinkling at the sides.

Everyone cheered.


Author's note: hi! This is my first posted story and what not, and I guess I'm pretty proud of it, and I know the whole argument thing was bullshit but I didn't know how to make it more interesting and stuff so leave reviews/ criticism/ flames or whatever so I can improve. I also don't have a beta, and I don't like to proofread, so feel free to point out mistakes!

I doubt I'll be adding more parts to this story, but I may do a sequel/spin-off. Or alternate endings – like different people become hokage and stuff.

Leave feedback!

candy crushed