Man… Haha! I haven't written a story in a LONG time. I know I have some unfinished ones… Unfortunately, those are going to be postponed until further notice…Mostly because I have to find the documents and get back into writing mode. I haven't written in an UBER long time so this might not be all that great…but, hey. I'm trying to get back into my writing groove. It'll take me a couple of tries however. -_-'

Ah-hem! ANYWAY!

Here's the basic information:

Pairing: Kakashi and Sakura with slight Jiraiya and Tsunade.

Rating: General

Genre: Romance/Tragedy (A maybe a bit of angst [or A LOT].)

Point of View: First person perspective from the character Sakura.

Summary/Basic Plot: Sakura learns the pain of letting someone go and what it means.

Disclaimer: I do not own ANYTHING other than the plot. All characters belong to the creator of Naruto and the poem is In Blackwater Woods by Mary Oliver. It is a wonderful poem.

Also! Some of you may have known me when my name was Sennishi Suzumori. It has now changed to Kesali Ruv. Sorry for the confusion. Reason to change was to perhaps show a turn of the leaf for coming back to Fanfiction if you know what I mean? O_o Haha! As for my other stories, they are postponed for now. I have to see if I still have the documents and see if I can write in them again.

On to the story!


"To live in this world…

You must be able to do three things:

To love what is mortal,

to hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it,

and, when the time comes to let it go…

to let it go."

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In this life, I did just that…Or at least tried to.

I loved what was mortal.

I held it against my bones knowing that if I let it go I would die.

The first two were easy.

The last one was so hard.

I didn't want to let it go. I didn't want to believe that he was really gone.

I waited at home: morning, afternoon, and night.

I made sure to leave a note every morning when I went to work saying how much I love and missed him.

I set an extra place setting for him in case he came back home in time for dinner.

I pulled back the covers on both sides of the bed for him to crawl into if he got back too late.

But it was all wishful thinking.

He never read the notes.

He never came home for dinner.

He never crawled into bed.

He was never coming back.

So. Today, standing here, I was going to try, once again, to let him go.

But I just can't.

I don't want to let him go.

"Sakura." I didn't turn to face my teacher. I couldn't find the energy to. The blonde Hokage came to stand next to me in front of this Memorial Stone, the names of those who gave their lives for their village etched into this black rock. "Sakura, to let go…doesn't necessarily mean you have to 'let him go'." My teacher, my foster mother, knelt in front of this stone lightly brushing her fingertips against a name that was very precious to her. "To let go, doesn't mean you have to forget everything about them.

"You can still carry around the memories, all the laughs, cries, and heartaches, but you have to let go of his life," Tsunade told me softly. "He's not going to come back, Sakura. No matter how much you or I want him to." I knew she wasn't just talking about him this time. She was talking about her own special person, the frog summoning Sannin. I knew that, despite the arguments between the two, my teacher really cared about Jiraiya. Once you noticed the quick glances and small favors, it was easy to see that Tsunade liked – perhaps even loved – him.

"I want to, but, Shishyou… it really hurts," I tell her. I know he'll be in my memories, but they weren't the same as if he really were here.

I would never see his crooked smile.

Or hear the way he laughed and sighed my name.

I would never feel his lips against mine.

I would never feel the strength of his arms as he held me.

No longer would I be able to catch his scent of the forest.

He was gone.

I was alone.

"I…I just… I miss him so, so much!" I cried. Why did life have to be this unfair? Why was it, whenever things were going good, it all just had to come crashing down?

How I wished, right now, that his arms would find their way around me. He would rest his chin on the top of my head, smile, and laugh tenderly telling me that he was sorry for making me worry. He would tell me, once more, how much he loved me.

He would tell me goodbye.

"I'm scared Shishyou," I confessed, my sobs growing stronger. "I'm scared that I'll start to forget. I'll forget him because he's not here anymore." Before I knew it, I was wrapped in a strong embrace. It wasn't his, but it was my mother's.

"I know you're scared, but you won't forget him. I know you won't forget him. You would never let that happen. Your love for him won't allow that." I gripped my Shishyou's clothing in my fists crying the hardest I had ever cried. She remained calm, stroking my hair and held me not bothering to utter anything else. She would be there to help me through this. We would help each other through this.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

"To live in this world…

You must be able to do three things:

To love what is mortal,

to hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it,

and, when the time comes to let it go…

to let it go."

In this life, I did just that…Or at least tried to.

Despite how strong he was and how skilled, he was only a man, but I loved him.

We had a wonderful life together, filled with more love than I could have imagined.

Up until now, however, I haven't been able to fully let him go, but I am trying.

One step at a time.


Okay! So there's a new story/oneshot by me. Hope you liked it. Comments are welcome, but if you do not like the pairing or are just aiming to flame, please don't. Go read another story that suits your interest better. Constructive criticism is welcome no matter how scared I am to read it. XP

Until next time perhaps?