You ever wondered why Orochimaru hates Itachi so damn much?Well,here are your answers.And just for the record,I was not sane when I wrote this(school).
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"Damn.I can't take this any more.Stupid weasel."A sweat drop trickled down Orochimaru's face.Itachi narrowed his eyes,adding to his rival's suffering.
"Orochy...I stepped on a helpless little snake on my way to the hideout."
"Gah!"
"I squished it's head."
"Ruthless bastard..."Orochimaru's eyes glistened with tears.
"Now you're equally brainless."Itachi smirked.This was soooo fun.
"Spotty eyes!Ha!"
"Your make-up is peeling."Orochimaru gasped."Have you been eating properly?You're skinny like a snake."
"Eyebags!"
"Your hair is greasy.",Itachi mocked,adding power to his glare.Glarrreeeeeeeee.
"Spotty...",snakey was running out of adjectives.
"Michael Jackson.",ooooohh,bad Itachiiiii!
"...I hate you."
"Sure.That's why you were staring at my behind last time I was bathing."Orochimaru went a shade paler.Is that even possible?
"I wasn't!"
"Don't worry,I understand.I love me too."
"...I think I know why you left Konoha.It wasn't big enough for your ego."
"I know about your feet fungus."
"Bitch."
"I saw you scratching your butt with your tongue."
"Evil bitch."
"Why thank you...".Oh,Itachi had him right where he wanted him.Glaaarrre.
"Your baby brother's hotter than you!Hah!"
"Not according to the way you ogle at me."
"Shithead."
"I spit in your shoes every day."
"Ewwww..."
"Sometimes twice a day."...Silence..."Remember the sandwich I made for you just the other day?"
"Um...What about it?"Orochimaru actually liked it.
"It was Zetsu's fertilizer."
"Ugh...I think I'm going to throw up..."
"Miss Bulimia."
"What?!"
"I know you force yourself to throw up when you're in the toilet."
"Noooo!"
"I know this nice place where they have a really good plastic surgeon."
"So go there."
"They can probably make your mouth smaller."
"Well I like it the way it is,bitch!"
"You could probably swallow an asteroid."Itachi grinned.
"You have Sasuke's naked baby pictures inside your cloak."
"So do you."Dead silence.
"Damn you weasel,to an eternity of listening to Celine Dion!"
"I know you're a virgin."
"Gah!!!Who told you,dammit??!"
"You just did."
"Your family crest is a paper fan!Lame..."
"And your middle name's Dorothy."
"Damn you..."Glare.Glare,glare!!!Shit!
"Just admit your defeat already."
"No way!I'm not losing another glaring contest,God dammit!"
"Fine...I'll just have to use the secret info card I stole from Kabuto!"
"NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!"
"Ahem...",Itachi coughed.
"No...Mommy...",Orochimaru stared back at Itachi with teary eyes.
"YOU HAVE A LIPGLOSS COLLECTION!!!MWAHAHAHAHAHA...!"
Orochimaru couldn't take this anymore.He was really sensitive when it came to his nonexisting lips.He stormed out of the room slamming the door shut.
The next day,the Akatsuki members found that he had left,leaving behind his cloak and a small note written in pink sparkly letters that read:
"Dear Akatsuki,
I hate you all.Damn you Itachi for hurting my feelings!Well,I'm off,so buh-bye.
P.S.Oh...And Zetsu,could you like,send me the adress of the store where you get your fertilizer?"
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I'm so damn bored...Need...life...iuiuiu...And my God forsaken keyboard is not functioning properly.I must remember not to use it as a weapon again...Crap.Oh,yeah!Review please!
