Chtulu and I
Disclaimer: I don't own The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy.
At age 29 I'm with the last person that I'd imagine, Chtulu. That stupid Grim had made a bet with Chtulu when he escaped from the phone lines. Grim lost and Chtulu would've taken him away forever. But I intervened. Chtulu had eventually agreed to play against me in golf. I lost. But Chtulu gave me a loophole. Agree to anything else he wanted and he'd let Grim go. I admit. I was hesitant. But Chtulu claimed that it would be worth my while. Plus I'd have Grim back under my control. So grudgingly, I agreed. Then he told me. On my twentieth birthday I was to abandon my life here in Endsville and become his wife. I was twelve then. Twelve and furious. When my twentieth birthday arrived I refused to leave. I told him that I'd rather marry a rock than him. And if I went lower I'd rather marry Billy. Then he killed him. Killed Billy. As I watched the dead idiot that I unfortunately had not only as a torture victim but also as my only friend, something in me snapped. I don't remember what happened next but Grim said that it ended with me snatching his scythe from his hands and making Chtulu blind. Permanently blind.
Needless to say attacking someone savagely is a crime and I ended up going to court. The same damn court that Billy and I went to settle 'The Keeper of the Reaper' years ago. Fortunately there was no Fred Fred Burger in the jury box. It was rumoured that a 'certain' juror murdered him but it was never proven. Personally, I don't think anyone really bothered.
I was found guilty of attempted murder and severe bodily harm. But instead of jail, the jury made me do much worse. They made me keep my deal and marry Chtulu. Except that now I was married to him for life. They even made Grim present me with a new hourglass that showed that I'd live for as long as Chtulu. I was furious. I tried to jump at the hourglass and break it but guards held me back.
I was taken to a lonely swampy world to live out my married life with Chtulu. We didn't even have a real wedding (not saying that I wanted one). Just the court ordering that a marriage certificate be made for us. Mandy and Chtulu. The thought of the union still makes me sick. I've tried to escape but I always got caught and Chtulu eventually told me that a tracking spell was put on me. I could never escape. Not for long. So eventually I stopped. I stopped trying. I always said that it was because it was a waste of time. But that was a lie. I think even Chtulu knows that too. It was because of the painful things that he did to me every time he caught me. I still have scars. Worst of all was the savage way he'd rape me if angered enough. He still did that. But when I used to make my escape it was much worse. Let's face it. A monster and a human are not physically compatible. A union is strange enough. Sex is another matter. And sex with Chtulu was always painful. And I mean screaming and often unable to stand properly if at all days afterwards kind of painful. He was never gentle. But it wouldn't have made much of a difference anyway. His parts weren't meant to enter mine. But they did. And every time it happened I was left in pain and tears. I wasn't weak. I knew that. But sex with Chtulu took me to levels of pain I've never planned on knowing. At least Chtulu never wanted children. I'd cut my uterus out before letting that happen anyway.
Suddenly I heard a sound behind me. I didn't turn around. I knew it was Chtulu moving around. The house was fixed in such a way that Chtulu's blindness was of little hindrance to him leading a normal independent life. But he still hated being blind. And of course hated the cause of his blindness even more. Me.
He called me over to him. I didn't move. He could easily find me. He was just being a stupid bastard.
I felt his hand touch my shoulder but I didn't move. Then his hand moved down to my elbow. I still didn't move. I could feel his nose on the back of my neck. It was becoming harder to stay so still.
"Mandy," Chtulu said gruffly, his voice always sounding that way when he attempted to speak English and after all our years of marriage, he could only say a few words.
I however learned his language in a few months. I could even speak it.
But Chtulu rarely spoke to me in English. So I couldn't help but turn towards him.
"Mandy," Chtulu repeated.
"What?" I decided to ask.
He then spoke about a whole bunch of stuff in his native language. Including about how my 'natural diabolical' and super intelligent mind caused me to only be temporarily affected with complete insanity after I first looked at him directly after he killed Billy, how he wished he could be a better husband, that he wished he could see how beautiful I must look, how he knew that he wasn't smart enough to learn foreign languages beyond a few words and that he wished that I could love him.
I listened to all this in silence.
"Happy Birth," Chtulu said and to my surprise kissed me lovingly on the cheek and walked away.
I hadn't even realized that he still remembered my birthday.
"Hey Chtulu," I said suddenly, "want to do something?" I asked him.
Chtulu turned around.
"Do?" Chtulu asked me.
"Like maybe go for a walk or something," I told him.
Chtulu walked up to me and held out his hand.
With trepidation I took it. Both of us exited the house and walked around for hours.
Upon returning I went and took a shower. Afterwards I decided to have a frank talk with Chtulu. I found him in the kitchen eating sloppily.
"Chtulu," I said seriously and he stopped eating, "I don't love you now and I never will," I told him frankly, "but since we're stuck together we might as well be civil to each other," I concluded.
Chtulu was silent for a moment. Then he suddenly let out a ferocious growl. Next thing I knew he flung the rest of his meal at me and I quickly dodged it.
"You ingrate!" I shouted angrily, "you never wanted any real peace between us did you?" I demanded.
"Out," Chtulu growled in a hateful response.
Then he roared even louder causing me to fall over. I got up and angrily stormed out of the kitchen.
Hours later Chtulu found me in the library. He grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the library despite my cursing and protests. He pulled me until he came to the entrance of the basement. A place he tortured me often.
Chtulu then told me how he was sick of my ungrateful attitude. How he actually thought that after my behaviour earlier that I had changed.
Then Chtulu issued me a threat. The next time I ran off he'd end it all right here. He'll go into the basement and kill himself and of course automatically kill me. He knew I hated cop-outs. Damn him.
"Not while our lives are intertwined," I told him, "you die, I die."
"Be better," Chtulu said in English and walked away.
I stood where I was seething for over half an hour.
By nightfall I was watching TV and eating brownie batter (Don't ask). Suddenly Chtulu came and blocked the TV.
"Bed," Chtulu said.
"Not on my birthday," I told him in response.
Chtulu smashed the TV.
"Well that's your solution, brute," I said.
Chtulu growled at me and then held out a box.
I soon realized that it was a present. I carefully took it and opened it. Inside was a sexy purple night gown, a pink ribbon, and two books. One book dealt with the Universe's best Conquerors and the other was about fun things partners could do together. I looked at my gifts carefully and then at Chtulu.
"It's all…nice," I said slowly, "happy birthday to me."
"Bed," Chtulu said again.
I glared at him. He knew how much I hated having sex with him.
But to my surprise he shook his head and indicated as best as he could towards the presents he gave me.
"The presents?" I asked and he nodded.
Soon it sunk in my head what he meant. I immediately felt like an idiot.
Minutes later we were in our bedroom and I had on the nightgown. I also held in my hands the book about conquerors. Chtulu only wore a pair of purple striped boxers. Both of us got into bed and I started reading while Chtulu rested.
I'd never love Chtulu. That was definite. But times like this made being stuck with him a little easier. And I mean a little easier.
The End
