Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel: Agents' of SHIELD

This takes place during the S2 midseason finale and three weeks later.

AN: for anyone interested I am putting all of my SkyeWard prompts and ideas on Tumblr under the name agentnightshade.

I was a…

Afraid to make a single sound

Grant Ward loves me. Grant Ward loves me. Grant Ward loves me. I couldn't wrap my head around it. After everything that has happened he still loves me and has never stopped. Having Raina confirm it just put icing on the cake and the look on his face; he was angry at her and I understood why. Now Whitehall can use me against him and he won't resist as long as I'm safe. Ward also kept his promise to me; that he would take me to my father. My father is crazy and unstable and he wants me to fulfill my destiny, whatever that is. Ward just wants me to be happy and I've come to realize that I can't be happy without him. When I touched the Diviner everything became clear. I love Grant Ward more than anything and I am going to have to make him hate me in order to save his life. This was going to hurt both of us, because I know that Grant would follow me anywhere and there is only one way to stop him.

Afraid I'd never be found

I don't wanna go another round

We were tied to chairs in a utility room of some kind and Whitehall was questioning me about my abilities.

"I don't know what I am capable off," I spat and jerked away from him, he put his hand on my knee and my father attacked him. He went down with some electroshock thing and Whitehall left the room. My father was unconscious and Ward was somewhere I couldn't see.

My father got up off the floor and headed out of the room, probably to get his revenge on Whitehall for what he did to my mother. And then I heard Ward's voice. He was alive, thank the Gods. He managed to cut himself free and made his way over to me.

When he put his hand on my knee I tried to remain as impassive as possible, but my walls of steel were cracking, "I'm sorry your little family reunion didn't go as planned, the least I can do is get you out of here," Ward said as he cut me loose. That was the understatement of the year, but it wasn't his fault and what happens next won't be his fault either. I got up and stretched.

"Sit down while I check the door," he said as he turned around and saw me following him. Now was my chance, I had to make him hate me otherwise he's going to die and the thought of living a life without him was too much to bear. So I ignored him and walked over to the fallen HYDRA agent and grabbed his gun. When Ward turned around to face me, I put the mask back on and fired five rounds into his side. I knew he was wearing a bulletproof plate underneath his jacket, but I was sure at least three of my shots hit him. I will never forgive myself. This had to be done. Grant Ward is a survivor, he's a fighter and he'll live. I'd rather have him alive and hating me than dead. So I kept up the façade.

"Never turn your back on the enemy. You taught me that," I said coldly, and then silently in my head I am so sorry. I love you too, more than anything. Please don't die. His shocked and hurt expression; made me want to turn back and help him, but I couldn't. I need him to hate me for a little while longer.

I ran into Agent 33 in the hallway, she pointed her gun at me and I lowered mine and dropped the mask, "Agent 33, I need you to help Grant Ward in the room down the hall. Please, he's been shot," I pleaded.

"What happened? Why should I help him?" she asked in that mechanical voice of hers. Her gun still aimed at my chest.

"He's the only one that will understand what you're going through. You can help each other," I told her calmly with an edge to my voice. I didn't have time for this.

"Who shot him?" she asked curiously, lowering her gun.

"I did," I said and winced. I will never forgive myself for what I have done or how I treated him for the past few months.

"You shot him? Why?" she asked incredulously as if she couldn't believe I was capable of such things.

"Yes, I shot him because I love him and it would take more than one bullet to bring him down. He would have followed me into hell and to his death. I would rather have him alive and hating me than dead in some unmarked grave. Please help him. He is everything to me," I replied my voice cracked at the end, tears pooling in my eyes.

"Alright, go do what you have to do. I'll take care of Ward," she said softly, heading in the direction of the room.

I turn to leave in the other direction when I remembered something, "Don't tell him about this conversation," I said, my voice wavering slightly.

She stopped in her tracks and then turned to face me, "Why not?" she asked confused.

I smiled a sad smile at her, "Because he won't believe you and if I make it out of here alive I would like to explain my actions to him face to face," I said.

"Okay."

We went our separate ways; Agent 33 to find Ward and me to find the tunnel and end this once and for all. On the way down the stairs I saw DC and my dad fighting and then I saw Whitehall's body. Damn…Coulson took away my fathers' revenge. I had to put an end to this.

Running into the room I yelled at my dad to stop and he listened. He called me Daisy. I'm named after a flower. I'll just make it my middle name. I helped Coulson and told him what I was doing, he didn't agree but there was no way he could stop me in his condition.

Before I headed into the tunnel I saw Ward and Agent 33 leaving the building. He was alive and going to be okay. I let out a breath and he must have heard me because he turned to look in my direction and his eyes widened, mine did too. Shit. I tried to convey everything I was feeling with my eyes and then I turned to run towards the tunnel.

"Skye!" Ward yelled, but I didn't turn around. I had to save everyone and I knew he couldn't fight off Agent 33 in his condition. So I just kept running.

An angry man's power will shut you up

Trip wires fill this house with tip-toed love

Trip died in the tunnel that day and it was my fault. All I could think about was Thank God it wasn't Ward. I developed Seismic Powers. My power is tied to my emotions and they have been all over the place and I can't sleep because every time I doze off I have night terrors and they're about Ward. He was in the tunnel with me instead of Trip and he died. Grant Ward dies in my arms every time I fall asleep. Every time I am angry or upset the earth shakes and I can't take it. I can't take that it's my fault Trip is dead; it's my fault Ward is going to have 3 scars on his side and they'll always be a reminder of what I did to him.

I will never forgive myself for what I have done and I don't deserve his forgiveness either. It would be easier if he hates me, but I know he doesn't. I saw the look in his eyes when he was leaving the building, after he got over the shock and hurt; he understood and when he looked right at me his gorgeous brown eyes were filled with fear. Fear for me, fear of losing me. He probably thinks I'm dead.

I've been sitting down here, in the deepest level of the Playground in Vault D for the past three weeks. I've been sitting on this cot isolating myself from everyone because I am afraid of myself and this cot in this vault still smells like Ward; he's the only one that has ever made me feel safe, even though he isn't here right now. Every time I think about him, it hurts because I love him and I miss him and I want him back. It's time I do something about my MIA status; no one knows I am down here. They all think I ran away and there is one person above all else I want to talk to more than anything.

Sitting up on the cot I dialed a number from memory; it rang three times and someone picked up, "Hello?" the slightly mechanical voice on the other end answered. I was so relieved that she picked up and the fact that she was answering Wards' phone meant that he was around somewhere.

"It's me," I said quietly, tears pooling in my eyes; I haven't slept in weeks for fear of causing an earthquake during my night terrors.

"You're alive," Agent 33 breathed down the line with a hint of surprise in her voice.

"Yes."

"How? What happened? After I got Ward out of there the whole building collapsed. He wanted to go back in and get you-," she paused and took a breath. I sucked air into my lungs and let it out.

"What?" I hissed. Fear overcoming me and I felt an earthquake starting to build up in my core.

"Don't worry. I knocked him out. You saved his life when you shot him, the bullets only grazed him. He understands, Skye. He heard what you said after you shot him. Ward isn't mad because you shot him; he's pissed at the fact that you prevented him from following you down to that temple. Now he's here alive and alone. He thinks you're dead. I've had to sedate him 7 times already. What happened?" she asked gently.

I have been thinking a lot about that very question and inbetween being stuck in my own head I have found out some information about Agent 33; her name is Kara Palama.

"Something happened to me down there," I rasped, clutching the phone to my ear. "Trip followed me down into that temple to stop Raina, but we were too late. She already started the process and the temple doors shut. We were trapped. The Diviner opened up to reveal purple crystals and mist came out of them. Trip smashed the crystals and emitted a force that blew the crystals into his stomach. Raina and I turned to stone. I felt numb and weightless and there was an immense power building in my core and then the stone started to break off me and I saw Trip. He was turning to ash. I don't know what happened to Raina all I know is that Trip is dead; it's my entire fault and my abilities were activated."

"I'm so sorry, Skye..." she started to say but trailed off; I could hear another voice in the background. The one I have been dying to hear for months. Ward. This was a bad idea. It will only end in disaster. I refuse to hurt him anymore than I already have even though the second time I hurt him was all fake; I had to be heartless and cold, otherwise AC would have never let me interrogate him even if it was the only way to get answers.

"Don't apologize; I just called to make sure that Ward is alive. I want to thank you for everything you have done for him. Thank you for taking care of Ward and making sure he didn't die down there, because if he would have stayed; it would be him dead instead of Trip and I wouldn't have been able to handle that. Also, while I have imprisoned myself down here, I hacked all of the old records and I found Ward's file. The whole fucking thing. I should have let him explain himself when I had the chance. I never should have doubted him; he never gave me a reason to and for that I will never forgive myself. I deserve my fate. I deserve to be alone for the rest of forever. I also found out something else; your name Agent 33 is Kara Palama, you were a level 6 SHIELD Specialist before you were kidnapped and brainwashed by HYDRA. Your sister is alive and she's looking for you, her name is Annie and she never believed for a minute that you were killed in action. I'm sorry I can't tell you more. Please take care of Ward? He needs a friend that will always watch his back. It should have been me, but I was too stubborn and angry to see past my own disappointment. I should have known better, he always taught me to trust my gut and instead when my gut was telling me to give him a chance? I listened to my head instead and became like Agent May; cold, calculating and unfeeling. Tell him that I love him and that I'm sorry for everything. Goodbye," there, I told her everything and I was about to hang up when the tone of her voice stopped me. It was frantic.

"Wait!" Kara yelled into the phone, "He wants to talk to you."

I sucked in a breath and let more tears fall, "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Too bad," she replied smugly and then I heard her hand the phone over.

"Skye?" the voice asked, wavering slightly.

"Ward," I managed to choke out, clutching the phone tighter to my ear and lying down on the cot.

"Prove it. Prove that it's really you and that you're not some LMD," he said, his voice stronger, like I remembered it.

I sighed, I knew this was coming. Stubborn Robot, "Before I went on my first undercover mission; to infiltrate Ian Quinn's compound in Malta, you taught me how to disarm an attacker. I made a joke. You were not amused. You told me about your older brother beating you up over a piece of birthday cake; your moment, when you chose to become a Protector, a Guardian."

"You're alive," he breathed and I could hear the relief in his voice. My chest ached. I miss him so much.

"Yes," I answered simply.

"How? What happened?" he asked softly.

"When I got down there, Raina already started the process and Trip followed me into the temple. To make it short; Trip died, my abilities were activated and it's all my fault," I told him, trying not choke on the lump in my throat.

"Skye, don't-," he started to say, but I cut him off, crying into the phone.

"Don't! Grant…don't tell…me that…Yes it is. I should…have listened to you…If I had…we would all be…okay. I'm sorry!" I said between sobs and the earth started to shake beneath me. I knew the team wasn't here. I have been tracking their movements; they haven't been back since they think I ran away. They're out there looking for me.

"Skye, calm down. I can hardly understand a word you're saying," Ward said in a soothing voice. I took a deep breath and counted to ten and then let it out.

"I'm sorry, Ward. I should have listened to you the first time. Everything is my fault. Everything," I whispered into the phone.

"What are you talking about?" he asked confused.

"I am afraid of myself. I haven't slept in weeks. Actually that's not accurate; I haven't slept in months. I have been having night terrors every time I close my eyes and when I open them the earth is shaking. I can't take it anymore. I can't. It hurts too much," I admitted, tears pooling down my face and landing on the hard pillow.

"This is my fate, Grant. I deserve to spend the rest of my life alone for everything I have done. I'm so sorry I hurt you, but I'm not sorry that I shot you. It was the only way you wouldn't follow me down there. If you followed me; it would be you dead instead of Trip. So I'm not sorry I shot you."

"I understand, Skye. I heard what you said after you threw my own words back in my face. The moment I saw you run into that tunnel alone, I understood. I am a bit pissed at you for not letting me follow you down there, though. Remember the last time you went in alone?" he took a breath, composing himself, "You almost died! You were dead. You were dead to the world and there was nothing I could do because I would have gotten into trouble and you needed me. I felt helpless. And that look in your eyes, when you ran down into that tunnel, alone; it told me that you were going to make the sacrifice to save everyone else, but yourself. You weren't expecting to make it out of there alive. I know you saved my life when you shot me, but I wish you would have let me come down there with you because it would have saved me three weeks of thinking that you were dead."

"I'm sorry, Ward! Okay? I'm sorry! But you don't understand, I saw it happen when I touched the Diviner. I saw your fate. You died instead of Trip and do you know what happened to me? I broke. I caused an earthquake so big that I destroyed San Juan and everyone in it. Everyone died. Everyone except me. I was alone because the one person I can't live without died in my arms. I couldn't take the pain, grief and agony. It was hell so I became a monster because it's easier to be the villain than the hero. There was no way in hell that I was going to let you follow me down there, Grant. There was no way, you can be angry with me all you want, but I would do it again if it meant you got out alive," I explained to him. My hand on the phone getting tighter. He means the world to me. I would rather die than live in a world where he doesn't exist.

"I really mean that much to you?" he asked, his voice uncertain.

"I love you, Grant Ward. I always have. It might not seem like it for the past few months, but it's true. I love you and I can't live without you," I said honestly, smiling into the phone.

"No one's ever said that to me before. You're not messing with me are you?" he asked tentatively. I understood why he would think that so I just let the tears roll down my face and sucked in a breath.

"I am not messing with you. I love you, Ward and I will love you forever," I said softly, everything hurt but I had to do this. He means everything to me and I need him alive.

"I just called to see how you were doing, to tell you that I'm sorry and that I love you. You and Kara take care of each other, okay? And don't you dare get yourself killed, I have to go. You'll always be my forever, Grant. Remember that. Goodbye Robot," I said and was about to hang up when Ward said something that changed everything.

"Skye, I love you too. Please don't leave me alone. I need you," he said brokenly and my heart was pounding in my chest.

"Grant, I-," I started, but he cut me off.

"Tell me where you are Skye. Tell me where you are and we'll come and get you. Let me help you for once. Don't shut me out. Please, I can't fail you again. Let me do this," he replied, his voice pleading.

I sighed. He thinks he failed me. It's actually the complete opposite, "You never failed me, Grant. I'm the one that failed you, I should have listened to my gut and I didn't. For that I will never forgive myself. I could have saved us months of pain. I know everything," I told him flatly, my voice devoid of emotion.

"What do you mean?" he started to ask and then he sucked in a ragged breath, "You read my file. Didn't you?" he asked, his voice soft and quiet. I let more tears fall down my face, and I clutched the cell phone tighter to my ear.

"Yes, Ward. I know everything, even the missing 5 years. I know what happened and this isn't a conversation to have over the phone," I said.

"Tell me where you are. Please," he said and I smiled. He'll never stop being my hero.

"Even if I did tell you, you wouldn't be able to get me out. It's safer for everyone this way. My abilities are tied to my emotions and I can't control them. I have tried everything, everything you taught me and everything May taught me, nothing helps. I am afraid of myself, if I get out and something triggers a certain emotion; I'll destroy everything. I can't Grant. I deserve to rot in here," I replied, my voice ragged. He sucked in a ragged breath.

"Skye listen to me, I know I'm not your SO anymore, but-," he started, I smiled to myself and cut him off.

"You're wrong Grant. I never replaced you, May just took over. On paper and in my heart you are still my SO. You always will be," I answered with conviction.

"Are you serious, Skye? Do you know how dangerous that is? Having a HYDRA Agent as your SO? You need to fix that right now! HYDRA is after my head," he said angrily. Ha! I knew that would piss him off. But it's true.

"Listen to me Agent Ward and listen carefully. You were never an Agent of HYDRA; you are an Agent of SHIELD. When I said I know everything, I meant it. I know everything."

"Skye, please, I need you," he pleaded; his voice had an edge to it.

"I need you too, Grant. But it's safer this way. I won't hurt you anymore, even if the second time was all fake," I replied in a broken whisper.

"I know, Skye. I can read you like a book and your eyes gave you away every time. You wear your heart and soul in your eyes, Rookie. And that is one of the reasons I fell in love with you," he said furiously. Now I was sobbing, really sobbing. By the time this conversation is over I am going to have no water left in my body.

"I'm sorry, Grant!" I wailed, "I can't let you come and get me. You'll never get in."

"Alright, Skye," he said in a soothing voice, "Then meet me halfway. Please don't shut me out."

I couldn't take it; I could just picture the look on his gorgeous face when he said that. I decided right then and there that I was going to find him.

I was about to respond when something must have clicked in his robot brain and I wasn't even surprised when he said, "You're at the Playground aren't you?" when I didn't reply he continued.

"And you locked yourself in the Vault like some criminal." I remained silent. I knew if I said anything the waterworks would start all over again.

"Damnit Skye!" he said, frustrated. "Why? Why would you do that?"

"Because it's the only place I feel safe, when you're not around and it still smells like you," I replied.

"Skye…Please, don't do this to yourself. Don't lock yourself away from me."

I sucked in a breath, and let it out, "Okay. I'll come out. Can you meet me in the ally where you kidnapped me the first time?" I asked him. My mind made up. I need him as much as he needs me, plus he's the only one that makes me feel safe and loved.

"Thank-you," he said relieved. "I'll be there in 12 hours." And then something else occurred to him, "How long have you been down there?"

I really didn't want to answer his question because he's well Ward. But ignoring him was not the way to go, "Three weeks."

"Skye! What the hell?" he hissed down the line and I could tell that he was exasperated with me and I could just see the fierce frown on his face.

"Does the team know you're down there?"

"No. They think I ran away after Trip died," I replied.

"Rookie," he admonished, "What were you thinking? I know you haven't been eating or sleeping I can tell by the sound of your voice."

"I'm okay, Ward. Really. Don't worry about me. I'll see you in 12 hours," I said.

"I love you."

"I love you too," he replied, before hanging up. I sucked in a breath and closed my phone. It was time to let myself out of here. Plus I had all of his stuff down here. It was time to give it back. I opened the barrier and stepped out with my laptop and the box full of Wards' stuff. I was going to see him in 12 hours. Finally.

Run out of excuses for everyone

So here I am and I will not run

Please read and review! I am looking forward to reading your thoughts and opinions. I really love SkyeWard and I think that even if Skye denies it she didn't want to kill Ward. She knew there was only one way to get him to not follow her and so she shot him, more than once, because it would take more than one bullet to incapacitate him. Now they are on equal footing and Skye will understand him better and can move on and they can forgive each other. I'm betting on S2 ep. 17 to be the turning point in the right direction for SkyeWard:)