Okay, so I'm not a hundred percent sure what you would consider this. It just kind of came to me and this is what I ended up with. I have no idea, to be honest, but I thought it was kind of cute.
All Dogs Go To Heaven
For years, I longed for him, figuring I would never be lucky enough to receive him, for my past clearly showed that luck was never on my side. Not only was I turned into a monster at the tender age of five, but I was revoked from the only school available to me until the kindly Albus Dumbledore arrived to declare that under no circumstances should a wizard be prohibited from schooling. It was because of dear Albus that my fortunes finally changed.
Life began to slowly but surely improve after my arrival at Hogwarts. I found myself three of the best friends anyone could ever ask for, and they did more for me than I could have ever asked them to. They did not shun me like most of the Wizarding world had or would in my later years. Instead, they tried their damnedest to make things easier for me, and that they did most successfully. I could never have found more perfect wizards.
Not only had I found three of the best friends I could have dreamed of, but I fell in love with the man of my dreams. I fell in love so fast and so hard, I honestly didn't even realize what had happened for months; maybe even years. It wasn't right that I was in love with him. I knew this very well, and yet, I couldn't stop myself from staring, following his steps with my eyes every time I saw him. We were perfect for each other and I knew it. How could something that seemed so right be so wrong to the rest of the world?
This question I pondered several times for many months before finally confronting the problem that stood before me. I told him how I felt and bravely awaited his response. As luck turned further in my favor than it had ever dared to do before, his response was not one of horror and disgust, but one of understanding. It did not take long for me to realize that my feelings for him were indeed mutual. Never in my life have I thanked Merlin more for being alive. Happiness doesn't even describe what I felt that day.
Before long, we were together in an official way, though when I look back at it, we had always been together in some form or another. Again, my wonderful friends were kind and understanding about our decision. I thought for sure they would be repulsed by the two of us and what we had discovered and decided to do so suddenly. But no, they were the most understanding of people.
Why, do you wonder, would anyone possibly be repulsed at two people who love each other being officially together? Because, said people in question are not what you would normally expect when thinking of a couple. Myself and the man I fell in love with are both of the male sex. Shocking? Well, it shouldn't be. That's what Sirius always said.
He is right, of course. He was always the one to take my hand in public. He was always the one to lightly kiss my cheek or nip my ear when we were out. He never cared who knew about us. To him, I was the man he loved and he wanted to world to know it, just like any other person in a relationship would want. I was always the timid one, the one who got embarrassed. I never wanted people to see me as the gay werewolf.
"But, Remus," Sirius had said to me once when I had admitted my insecurity to him, "That's what you are. A gay werewolf. Don't be ashamed of what you are. I'll love you no matter what other people think. Shouldn't that be all that matters?"
And with that, I changed the way I saw us as a couple. He was no longer something to hide. He was something to share, something to really be proud of, not that he hadn't always been, but now I felt comfortable showing it. He did always know what to say, how to make me feel better. If there was ever a more perfect person out there for me, then I'll be damned for not finding him. Because my Sirius was perfect in every essence. And I never could have asked for more.
Until now, of course.
Now, I would have asked for more time. I would have asked to have found him sooner. I would have asked to spend every waking moment with him, and every sleeping second in his arms. I would have asked him to live longer for me. To live out my entire life rather than the shortened life he was permitted.
He is gone now, much too soon. The pain of it hurts me more than the werewolf ever could have dreamed. I have lost my soul mate and I know I will never find another. Why would I even look for one, when I already had and lost mine. My heart will remain his forever. But that doesn't stop it from aching with desire to hold him, to kiss him just one more time. To have told him how very much I loved him before he left me. Before he left us all.
He was always too reckless. But who could blame him? Regardless of house and how he thought, he was still a Black at heart. The Black blood still ran through his veins, no matter how desperately he wished it didn't. But everyone knew Blacks were very well-known for being so utterly and foolishly reckless. If only he had listened to me, to Dumbledore, he would still be here. But I cannot be so greedy as to have begged that of him. Had anything happened to his beloved Godson in that terrible fight, while he stayed behind, I don't think he could have ever properly lived again. Not only would he have had the weight of James and Lily's death on his shoulders, but also their son, to whom they entrusted him to watch over in the event of their deaths.
I don't think my dear Sirius would have ever been the same. And to be optimistic, I know I'll see him again. After all, all dogs go to heaven, right?
Okay, so there it is. Whatever it is. Review and tell me what you thought.
Prongsie :)
