A/N: A belated story for Secrets4theundergroud based on our discussion about Eric and technology. It didn't quite end up how we discussed, but I hope you enjoy it anyway :) Alphonse is a character from a couple of my other stories ('Big Brother Steps In' and 'Must Be The Suit'). No real time frame, but definitely early in the series.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Lots Of Love
Pam frowned as she scrolled through her text messages as she made her way to Eric's office, it seemed that his attempts to master 'text speak' were starting to get out of hand. Eric looked up from finishing up the evening's accounts as she barged into his office.
"I realise that 'text speak' is something that you're still trying to master," she began without preamble, "but-"
Eric interrupted her before she could continue, "I'm not trying to master it, I have mastered it."
Pam put a hand on her hip, "Oh really?"
Eric sat back in his chair, "Yes."
"Fine," Pam scrolled through her phone, "what does 'BRB' mean?"
Eric rolled his eyes, "Bring Real Blood."
Pam hid a smirk as she scrolled through further messages, "I see. And 'YOLO'?"
Eric shifted in his seat, looking a shade uncomfortable, "You Only Love Once."
Pam raised an eyebrow as she looked up at him, "So 'LOL' is?"
Eric cleared his throat and shuffled some papers on his desk, "Lots Of Love."
Both of Pam's eyebrows shot up, "And 'OTP'?"
"On The Prowl."
"On The Prowl?"
Eric looked up at her with a shrug, "I thought it was stupid too, but I didn't make them up."
Pam regarded him for a long moment, "Eric, where did you get these from?"
"Alphonse."
"Alphonse?" she repeated.
"Yes."
"And you trusted him?" she asked, incredulously.
Eric narrowed his eyes, "Why?"
"Well, for a start, 'LOL' means 'Laugh Out Loud'," she said flatly.
Eric blinked, "You mean I've actually been laughing at you every time I've signed off on a text?" he asked after a moment.
Pam inclined her head, trying to hide a smile, "It did seem a little odd."
Eric's eyes flashed, "I'll kill him," he swore, reaching for his phone.
This time Pam wasn't quite so successful in hiding her amusement as she turned back to her phone, feigning nonchalance. "I confess what surprised me the most was that Bill and Jessica were your One True Pairing," she said lightly.
Eric looked up from the message he was furiously typing, "It's not funny."
Pam smirked, "It is a little bit funny."
Eric froze in the middle of his typing, "I suppose this means that 'WTF' doesn't mean 'Wow That's Fantastic'."
"Um…no."
Eric looked up at her, "Is it bad?"
Pam bit her lip, all her amusement gone, "That depends, who did you send it to and why?"
Eric frowned, "Godric told me that he might be able to come and visit us in a couple of weeks."
Pam suppressed a wince, "You may want to call him."
Eric turned back to his phone with a thunderous expression, "I'm definitely going to kill him."
"He's your brother, Eric, why did you take his word on it?" Pam asked as Eric sent off the message with a grim look.
"Because he uses it all the time," he paused, "I suppose I should have been suspicious when he told me that 'IDC' means 'Incredibly Devoted Child'." He stared up at her in horror, "Oh G-d, I texted that to Godric too…"
Pam stared back at him, equally horrified, "You sent 'WTF IDC' to your Maker in response to him coming to visit?"
There was a long pause.
"Do I want to know what I actually sent him?" Eric asked finally.
Pam shook her head, "Probably not."
Eric let out a heavy sigh as he leaned forward on his desk with his head in his hands.
Pam regarded him for a long moment before flipping her hair over her shoulder, in a show of indifference. "On the plus side, this explains why 'LOL' was your favourite way to end a conversation," she began casually. Eric looked up and she raised an eyebrow, "Are you getting sentimental in your old age?" she teased.
Eric shrugged a shoulder, "It didn't seem as saccharine in text speak," he explained gruffly.
Pam came to perch on the edge of his desk, just out of his immediate reach, "I'd be happy to explain what all the abbreviations actually mean, but there's nothing stopping us from having our own code." She gave him a sly smile as he slowly turned to look up at her.
"I must admit that I did like Alphonse's version of 'STFU'," he commented after a moment.
"Oh?"
"Still True Forever (to) You," he explained in a low tone, Pam ducked her head to hide her smile. Eric grimaced, "That bad, huh?"
Pam looked back up at him, "Let's just say that I'm glad you explained that one to me before you used it."
Eric clenched his jaw and looked away, only to catch a glimpse of the long slit in Pam's skirt. He grinned, his momentary anger forgotten as he looked back up at her.
"Fortunately, I can think of other ways to prove the truth of that statement," he said, standing up and moving towards her.
"Is that so?" she asked, leaning back slightly as he loomed above her.
Eric cupped her chin in his hand, "Perhaps you need a reminder."
Pam's eyes flicked to his lips, "It has been a while."
"Well, I'd hate for you to get the wrong impression," he told her, leaning in.
"Heaven forbid," Pam murmured as he closed the distance and kissed her.
"And for the record," Eric continued as they broke apart, "we are my One True Pairing," he informed her as he scooped her up in his arms.
Pam smirked, "Well, You Only Love Once."
Eric paused on his way to the door, "That's not right either is it?"
Pam shook her head, "Not in text speak," she paused, "but it is for me."
Eric smirked as he resumed walking, "Now who's getting sentimental?"
"It seemed less saccharine in text speak," Pam replied sweetly.
Eric laughed, "Definitely my OTP," he said seriously as they disappeared at vampire speed into the night.
Much later, Eric would remember to send an apology through to his Maker but, for the moment, he was too busy indulging in his preferred method of communication with his Child.
