This is ZADR, a Zim and dib romance. Its ridiculously fluffy, and Zim is ooc like none other. I suck at writing Zim, so forgive me. I built him a little heart with emotions and everything! There's sex, swearing, lurrrrrrrvee.

Disclaimer: not mine, obviously. Jhonen would never allow these shenanigans to take place.

Zim's in Lurrrrve

It was raining in the filthy earth city 17 year old Zim resided in. Filthy, filthy filthy. And ugly. Why Irk, why is it that there is only one clean, beautiful person in this whole city? I want that person. He shivered in the rain and pulled a splinter from his palm. Damn trees. He peered through the branches to that beautiful person. He traced his finger on the glass, pretending it was on pale flawless skin. Threaded his long green fingers through black silk, shuddering at the feel and contrast of-

Thump. Thumpthumpthump. He looked at the window to his far right. The scary one was staring right at him. She opened her window, and menacingly growled "Get the fuck in."

Zim gulped and dared not refuse. The bitch could rip out his windpipe with her eyes if she tried, he was sure. He scooted along the branch til he was close to her ledge, and he pulled himself in with his legs.

He shakily now stood at about 5' 9", he could've run for Tallest had he not been exiled. He blinked to adjust his amber eyes to the darkness, but Gaz pushed him out of her room and locked it before he got a good look around. He braced himself on the wall and rolled his thin shoulders. He wasn't an idiot, he was going to take the opportunity Irk had so thoughtfully bestowed on him.

He made his way down the hallway and walked through Dib's open doorway.He froze, looking down on his one-time enemy. A few random thoughts ran through his brain: oh Irk if I could get him to grow out his hair, why did I call him a stink beast again? He never stunk. He smells like sleep and soap and.. Feels like..Zim stopped himself.

He had slowly waded through the piles of junk that made its home on Dib's floor until he was centimeters away from touching his face, his hand hovering above his cheekbone.

Dib's eyes shot open, his brain shocked into consciousness by the Invader's cool touch. Before he could react, Zim jumped back and fell over a pile of pictures of himself.Dib sat up, only in his black boxers, and snorted. The snort turned into a full-on laugh attack, where he was left laying face-up on the floor, holding his side with tears streaming down his face. Zim had righted himself about 10 minutes earlier, and was now staring at the human in amazement, happy that he could provoke such joy.

Suddenly his eyes narrowed, catlike, and he crawled on his hands and knees towards his prey, his black jeans molding to his alien body along with his black t-shirt. He found he was attracted to this color very much, and that might've been why he had fallen so hard for Dib and his long black hair. He was glad to have finally found a life mate, even if it was a stooopid human, because every Irken knew there was strength in numbers.He pounced on Dib, and straddled his narrow waist, taking his wrists and pinning them to the floor. Dib panicked and started yelling and kicking and trying to knock the teen off of him. Zim's eyes widened, and on an impulse pressed his mouth to the human's.

Dib's eyes turned into dinner plates at the shock of having his.. His.. enemy trying to kiss him!

He felt a new, wet pressure pressing at his lips, and they parted with gasp of outrage! Of course it was outrage, not lust. Nope, definitely not.His eyes closed with... fury, and he moanedddddd with oh fuck it, he moaned with pleasure at having the reptilian tongue inside his own mouth, wrapping around his tongue and massaging it. He felt a deep purr reverberate through Zim's chest, and he gave a small smile.

Zim lowered himself until they were laying chest to chest and their legs entangled. Zim continued his ministrations on his Dib-Love's mouth while he snaked his arms around his waist pulling him even closer. Dib slowly wrapped one arm around Zim's neck to the same effect of the ones around his waist, and used the other one to stroke the back of his neck.They both ignored the call of oxygen, until they finally pulled apart, panting.

Stormy grey met amber, and Dib raised a arched black eyebrow. "What the fuck."

Zim gave him a sheepish smile as he racked his brain for a response. "Uh, I've wanted this for a long time. And uh, on my planet, everybody has one life mate. And I'm pretty sure you're mine." He stopped at the look in Dib's eyes. "But only if you want to be.. " He said in an soft, slightly apologetic voice.

Dib sat up and leaned against the bed. "Explain this life mate thing."

Zim tugged at an antennae. "Well, as my life mate, I would have to protect you. And mark you as mine, as my equal. Everything that is mine would become yours. And the same for you. But if you don't accept me willingly as your own life mate, my squeedly spooch will eat my other organs. And that'd probably kill me." He grimaced at the pain that would result from having your organs gnawed at all day.

Dib went over this new information, and flicked a cigarette butt off the floor. "Alright. What exactly do I have to do to make it official and stuff?"Zim looked up at Dib, dumbstruck. He accepted me, just like that? Fireworks went off in his skifferdee doo, and he shot the raven haired boy a giddy, razor sharp smile. Dib looked down at the floor, feeling shy all of a sudden. "Well I always kinda liked you a little bit and stuff so why not you know?" he grumbled softly, a smile tugging on the edges of his lips at the other boy's happiness.

"I like you too obviously, a lot! You have no idea how scared I was coming in here... anyway, alright the first thing we have to do is" a dark blue blush painted his cheeks, and he swallowed his nervousness, "is... you know..." He made some swift hand gestures. Sex, people. Hot gay alien sex.

The blood drained from Dib's face. "Oh. Uh, right now?" Zim stood, pulling Dib along with him. "Uh yeah, actually its only 8 o'clock, we have time to walk to my house if you prefer we do it there."Dib nodded enthusiastically, thinking of Gaz's reaction if she walked in on them in the middle of...

" Yeahyeahyeah, I'll grab my stuff."

8l) I'm a total perv I know.

They took their time walking to Zim's casa, swinging their threaded fingers through the rain.They talked quietly about their family, or life before Earth in Zim's case. It was easy to open up to someone you've known for 5 years, even if you've never had anyone to open up to before.

By the time they reached the neon green door, Dib understood the cold, illogical world Zim grew up in, and vice versa.GIR was asleep in the microwave, mumbling something about peanut butter and lighthouses, so they headed straight down the hall to the master bedroom.

Zim had never used it, and GIR couldn't break the lock, so it remained an ordinary room with red walls and a king-sized bed. The bed had a black comforter on it, and black silk sheets. 'How clique,' thought Dib, 'but nice'.

Zim bounced on his heels and looked around the room awkwardly, until he saw Dib start to undress. He was mesmerized by the inches of pale skin being revealed as his mate removed his shirt, and then his pants to reveal the black boxers he was wearing earlier. He stretched the lean muscle in his torso by lifting his arms above his head and cracking his neck, to which he gave a pleasurable murmur. He opened his eyes to see Zim standing there, mouth gaping, and Dib blushed and muttered, "Well I thought we were going to.. You know." Suddenly his voice went 3 octaves, "Why am I the only one undressed?!"

Zim grinned wildly and nodded, undoing his jeans and pulling off his shirt to reveal similar boxers, except his had taquitos and spaceships on them. Dib giggled, and Zim glared and growled, " GIR bought them for me, and I wasn't about to refuse free undergarments!"

He pouted until a predatory glint he had never seen before sparked in Dib's stormy grey eyes. Zim flashed sharp teeth, and his love tackled him onto a sea of black.

The scene soon turned into the one at Dib's house, except this time with more hands feeling everywhere. They were also more daring this time around, Dib soon realized, and squeaked as 2 sharp claws pinched his butt, and his boxers were tugged downwards.

Zim pulled his own off and straddled Dib, who released a sharp exhale as Zim ground his groin against his own."Oh fuck.. Zim I.. I'm ""Tell Zim what you want..." In the heat of the moment, Zim had unknowingly reverted back to his old childhood habit of talking in the 3rd person.

"Zim.. I-I wannnttt... oh fuckk, so good.."

"Tell Zim and Ill give it to you!" Zim gave one final movement of his hips, and stopped.

"Zim please, I want you. I-inside of me. Please!!"

Zim kissed Dib's lips gently and swiftly leaned over the side of the bed, and came back with a bottle of massage oil. He gave his lover an innocent grin,"How did this get in here?", and he squirted a healthy amount onto his clawed fingers.

He kissed Dib's nose and used his other unoiled hand to put a pillow under his back. Zim gently inserted one finger, and Dib gasped at the sensation, it felt... strange to say the least. Zim pulled out the one and inserted 2 fingers and pushed them in slowly to the knuckle, and scissored them until he felt the other teen relax around him.He shifted the human's legs until they rested on his shoulder, and he positioned himself at Dib's entrance.

"R-ready? It might hurt a little at first, but it'll feel good after a while I promise." Dib took a deep breath, and nodded. "Yeah. I want you to move now."Zim hesitated, but then slowly pushed himself into Dib up to the hilt. 'Holy mother of whatever god created this tight, human heat!! Irk oh my god' he thought frantically. He pulled out slightly, and then thrust in again, creating a rhythm.

He tilted his hips until he felt Dib-Love's muscles clench and he heard a moan of ecstasy. He continued, hitting that spot every time and getting faster with every thrust.

Dib didn't know what Zim was hitting, but damn! So this is what he was missing, all those hours wasted watching Mysterious Mysteries, it didn't even come fucking close. He could feel his orgasm coming, and he started to stroke himself in the delicious rhythm of Zim's thrusts, another moan ripped out of his vocal cords. Finally when he couldn't take any more, his vision went white, and every muscle in his body tensed as pleasure rippled through every nerve in his body.

Zim barely thought he could take watching Dib pleasure himself, but seeing him writhe beneath him moaning his name was too much. He too saw white and shot his load deep within his lover and collapsed onto Dib's chest, panting. They laid there for god knows how long, satisfied beyond belief in each other's arms. They exchanged murmured 'I love you's' and eventually Zim pulled out to Dib's displeasure. "Heyy.." He grumbled until Zim silenced him with a kiss, and they slept for a long time..

--

Dib woke the next morning smelling of sex and spunk, so he decided to use the shower attached to the master bedroom. He looked at the knobs screwed into the blue tiles, one with 'Acid' engraved on it, the other 'Paste'. He went with the acid, following his instincts, and got water.

A silly grin stayed pasted on his face as he showered, dressed, and plopped on the couch next to GIR. "Whatcha watching?" he asked the small green dog/robot.GIR turned to him with frosting all over his face, and said simply, "Porn". Dib raised both eyebrows when he saw it was, in fact, A Night in Paris. He dropped his cereal on the floor and ran to the elevator, his trench coat flying behind him like a cape.

He took the elevator down to the lab, where he hoped Zim would be.The doors dinged and opened to reveal Zim with a pout on his face. "Zim was gonna to go wake you up.." Dib grinned, but then blushed madly as he thought of the previous night. "So uh, you still wanna be my life mate and everything, I mean now that we.. Yeah."

Zim looked as shocked as though Dib had just punched him in the mouth. "Do you think I would just screw you and leave? Dib, I love you, what I basically asked of you last night was to marry me. Except not in a stinky earth way, in a better, Irken way." He gave Dib a lopsided, goofy grin. Dib's heart skipped several beats and threatened to set his chest aflame. He softly replied, "I love you too." They later completed the bond, and lived happily ever after. And had lots of sex.

The End : D

Well that's the end of this little fluffy ride. Please exit to the left, and write a review while you're at it. : D