Everyone has that girl before the girl. And Aubrey has been that girl for as long as she remembers.
Back in eighth grade, she was that girl for Brady Ferguson. He was a really shy boy and had no idea how to talk to a girl. But he always finished third in anything they did in gym class and he was a straight A student all through middle school. So Aubrey knew he was athletic and smart. And she noticed how he would always hang back before entering a room whenever there was a girl after him. So even though he can't say a single word to a girl, he knew how to treat one.
She saw the potential in him and while he was nowhere near being the boy, he could be.
Her dad always said, "If you can't make things happen for you, nothing will happen to you."
She took his advice and started training Brady to be the boy for her.
She lured his voice out and taught him how to use it in conversations and in songs. He wasn't Elton John or anything but when he serenaded her with a rendition of 'She's the One' on their third date, she was touched.
She taught him how to look a person in the eye when talking to them.
She taught him how to gain her father's approval and as a consequence, how to impress any parent in the world.
She taught him how to kiss even when she herself had no idea how.
It's funny how all the work out that she had told him to do over their summer before high school was what brought him to his girl, Jessica Temple. She was the prettiest freshman in their school. She had noticed his four pack and toned arms like everyone else. And he definitely noticed her from the way he kept stealing glances at her.
It took Brady three months, one week and six days to gather up the courage to dump Aubrey.
He thanked her for everything she taught him. But he always thought their relationship was a little forced and they both deserved better than that.
She had felt the same way but it still broke her heart. So she swore she would never try to create the perfect boyfriend again.
…
But in her senior year of high school, she met a girl who spent her lunch period in the girl's bathroom.
When Aubrey first realized how the last stall was always occupied, she had ignored it thinking that if the girl was hiding herself, she probably did not want to be disturbed. But her curiosity got the better of her.
She knocked on the stall's door on a Tuesday and found her next project.
Aubrey had always noticed how she sometimes stared at girls for a little too long. She told herself that she was just appreciating the female form. There was nothing gay about that. Everyone knows that girls are beautiful and if people could stare at a work of art without wanting to hump it, why can't she?
But during dull moments in her classes, she would find herself thinking about it, what it might mean. And Teresa was her chance to find out once and for all.
When they first kissed, she thought yes, she wanted more than to hump god's work of art that was women. And maybe this time will be different because she felt this weird tingle in her hand every time she was around Teresa that was absent when she was with Brady. And she no longer pulled away from a kiss to comment on Teresa's technique. In fact, her mind emptied itself whenever they kissed.
She was convinced that she had done it right this time.
But it turned out that Teresa had been hopelessly in love with someone else for over six years and being with Aubrey gave her the confidence to finally admit her feelings to her childhood friend who she had stopped talking to two years ago.
…
Teresa still calls Aubrey sometimes. She is actually thinking of proposing to her girlfriend (yes, the same one from high school) after they both graduate from university.
So when she met Chloe, her new roommate at Barden who seemed to require constant physical contact, she immediately tried to find all that was wrong about Chloe.
One. She was going to audition for the Barden Bellas which automatically made her Aubrey's competition.
Two. She's too cheerful.
Three. She had an Aguilerean voice which instantly increased her threat level.
Four. She smiled all the time.
Five. She and Aubrey made the Bellas so Aubrey will be competing with her for a solo.
Six. God, that smile was so pretty.
Seven. See? She was very distracting.
Eight. For some reason, she volunteered Aubrey for a solo. What's her game? Was she trying to catch Aubrey off guard?
Nine. She must have known about Aubrey's vomiting episodes. Aubrey will never get another solo now that she had sprayed half of the Bellas with her lunch via her mouth.
Ten. She was impossible to hate. When Aubrey ran into the bathroom, she was the only one who followed Aubrey and helped clean her up.
It's okay, Aubrey told herself. They're just feelings. Chemicals mixing together in her body in a very stupid way. She figured if scientists can manipulate them in a lab, so can she.
…
And for three years, she managed to keep her feelings for Chloe in check.
Then Beca came along. With her ear monstrosities and her need to tell Aubrey how her alt ways can make them champions every chance she got.
She drove Aubrey crazy. Every time she was near Beca, her heart beat furiously.
At first, Aubrey thought it was jealousy. She can see how smitten Chloe was with Beca. But she also noticed how she had never felt this angry with anyone ever.
They say, there is a thin line between love and hate. And Aubrey was confident that this was hate.
She wasn't projecting when she accused Beca of having a toner for Jesse. And the way Beca screamed, "That's my dick!" definitely did not make her flush when she was alone in her bed that night. And the stuff that happened before she went to sleep was only due to Chloe blasting her lady jam in the middle of night.
Then she noticed how Chloe had added not exactly new songs to her mp3 player. Not exactly new because they were songs she already had but different somehow. Like someone had taken them apart and put them back together with bit and pieces Aubrey could not recognize wedged nicely between the parts she knew.
She asked Chloe one day.
"Oh, it's Beca," was Chloe's simple answer without further explanation. And she didn't demand it because by then, her automatic reaction towards anything involving Beca was to ignore it.
But it was hard to ignore it when Chloe kept playing Beca's songs in their living room. And she wouldn't wear her earphones. She would plug in her mp3 player to their shared docking station and turn the volume up as high as possible without disturbing their neighbors.
Aubrey, for the life of her, cannot figure out why she didn't just tell Chloe to turn it down. What she knew was Chloe's insistence to force Beca into her ears only enraged her more. Whenever she saw Beca, all she wanted to do was slam that little nuisance against the wall and…
And what?
Fuck.
Well, that was one way to put it.
…
But she can't. She can't be the girl who was pining for someone she can't have again.
She walked in on Beca and Chloe a few months ago.
"Damn it, Chloe!" she had cried out frustratedly when she opened the door and heard Chloe's lady jam. "I told you not to do it on the couch."
Chloe's head peeked out from the front of the couch. "Sorry. We got a little carried away."
We?
It was then that Aubrey realized the mess of clothes on the floor. And when she looked up again, Beca's head had joined Chloe's to curiously stare at her.
"I guess you really did see my toner," Beca said, her lips crooking into a smirk.
"Stop it," Chloe whispered pushing her back down. Then she turned back to Aubrey and said, "We'll just, uh, move ourselves into my room."
Aubrey nodded and waited but they didn't move.
"We're also very naked," Beca exclaimed, still hidden at the front of the couch.
Aubrey quickly turned around.
Well, at least this time she wasn't dating any one of them while unintentionally pushing them together.
She just wished that they would stop shoving their relationship down her throat so much. Although, to be fair, they didn't know how she felt about either of them.
Or so she thought.
Apparently, they understood her feelings more than she did.
She had come home today to find them making out yet again and she finally had enough of it. She stormed out of the apartment before either of them could say a word.
About a minute later, she heard footsteps following her. And when they finally caught up to her, she expected to find Chloe.
But when she turned around, she found Beca instead.
"I'm sorry," Beca said in between pants. "We're sorry."
"There's nothing to be sorry about," Aubrey said, her eyes looking everywhere but Beca. "I mean you're a couple. I was just giving you guys some privacy."
"No, you don't understand—" Beca's head moved to follow Aubrey's eyes but to no avail. "Could you look at me?" she finally said. "Please."
Aubrey sighed. What else was there to understand? But Beca saying please was such a rare thing so she lifted up her chin and looked at Beca.
Beca must have not thought this through because now she was the one who can't seem to meet Aubrey's eyes.
Aubrey quirked an eyebrow. "Come on, spit it out."
Beca raised a finger. "Just give me a second." She inhaled deeply and as she exhaled, she said, "It was Chloe's idea."
"What was Chloe's idea?"
"All of this. She said it would make you pay more attention."
"I don't get it," Aubrey shook her head.
Beca finally stilled her gaze to meet Aubrey's eyes. "I like you."
"So you decided to make me jealous by having sex with my roommate?" Aubrey asked, frowning.
"That's the part that you don't understand," Beca said. "I didn't understand it either at first because I already have Chloe and I love her so much but then there's you. God, you drive me crazy."
"Tell me about it," Aubrey muttered.
Beca rolled her eyes but continued, "So one day, Chloe told me to describe how exactly you make me feel."
"So what did you say?" Aubrey smiled at how she directed her eyes downwards and how her cheeks were instantly colored red.
"I said," she mumbled, "you make my heart thump madly. I felt this sort of restlessness," her words were becoming clearer, "like if I can't help us win the ICCA, I can't sleep. I desperately wanted you to listen to me. And that's not me. I've only ever looked out for myself."
"But maybe that's because of Chloe," Aubrey said. She still can't let her hopes up.
"Yeah, that's half true," Beca said, looking up. "But the remaining half of the reason is you."
"So what are you saying?" Aubrey asked. She was still confused. Why was Beca saying all these things when Chloe was only about ten doors away. "Are you saying you want Chloe and me to share you? Is Chloe okay with that?"
"Yes and yes. But only if we could share you."
Okay, her head was starting to spin. "What?"
"When I told Chloe all these things, she said she understood because she felt the same way about you. Except with her, her palms tingle and it hasn't stopped since you two met in freshman year."
"Why hasn't she told me?"
"Because you kept shutting her out."
She needed to sit down. "I need to process this." She leaned against the wall afraid that if she didn't have proper support, she would fall instead of gracefully bringing herself down to a sitting position. "So you like me?" Beca nodded, joining her on the floor. "Chloe likes me? And you both want to date me?" Beca nodded to both questions.
"So the only question that remains is do you want to date us," Beca said.
That was a good question.
…
She thought about her feelings for Chloe, how it never went away after she realized her feelings for Beca. And if she looked past the jealousy she felt when Chloe was teaching Beca their choreography, it was kind of adorable. And that time when she came back home to Chloe dancing to Beca's songs and thought that it was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen.
She always thought of them as two separate people. And they were. That was why she never thought of the idea of being in love with both of them at the same time.
And now that she had, it made sense. It connected dots she never knew existed.
It had always been Beca and Chloe. Chloe and Beca. And the unease she felt when they were together was because she felt left out.
"Okay," she finally said.
"Okay?" Beca asked.
"We take it one step at a time and see how it goes."
"Okay," Beca said, smiling. She stood up and held out her hand to Aubrey.
Aubrey took it and didn't let go even after Beca had helped her up.
When they returned to the apartment, they were greeted by an amazing smell.
"So it's all settled?" Chloe asked when they found her in the kitchen.
Aubrey and Beca both nodded.
"I told you so," Chloe said to Beca, winking.
"Fine, take all the credit," Beca countered. "It's not like I did all the heavy lifting."
"Did you wake up at seven in the morning to prepare this special dinner for all of us?" Chloe asked.
"Wait, you knew this was going to happen?" Aubrey asked before Beca could come up with a retort.
"I know you, Aubrey," Chloe said, smiling.
"Well, I can't argue with that," Beca said, letting go of Aubrey's hand.
It suddenly felt cold without Beca's warmth in her hand.
Beca kissed Chloe's cheek.
Aubrey felt that unease she was so used to creeping into her stomach.
But then Chloe motioned her over. "Come here, silly."
She walked towards the kitchen counter instead of behind it. Her insecurity still plagued her.
But even with the physical barrier, it didn't stop Chloe. She leaned forward and kissed her.
It was chaste but sweet.
"I've wanted to do that for a very long time," Chloe said when she pulled away.
Beca just looked at them and smiled.
"Aww," Chloe said, turning to Beca and then back to Aubrey. "You're both still too shy with each other."
"We haven't had our first date yet," Beca reasoned, knocking Chloe's shoulder with hers.
"This could be our first date," Chloe suggested.
Aubrey shook her head. "Nope. Our first date won't be after I caught the two of you making out to Chloe's lady jam."
Beca sighed. "I bet you're thinking of going to a fancy restaurant where we pay a million bucks for a tiny bit of food."
"Now, you don't want to be bloated for after," Chloe teased.
"Chloe," Beca said with mocked surprise. "We're all ladies here."
"Mmhmm, my experience from last night begs to differ."
Aubrey leaned against counter and watched her two girls banter, no longer feeling that unease in her stomach.
Sometime during the banter, Beca reached for her hand and squeezed it which prompted Chloe to jog around the counter towards Aubrey.
"Oh, I see what you're doing," she put her arm around Aubrey. "I can buy her support with my love too."
Aubrey chuckled.
She had always been that girl before the girl but she never thought of being the girl for two people.
Maybe this was better.
