The shock comes in waves.
The first wave hits him with the weight of a brick wall, and he drops to his knees, breath struggling to enter his lungs. People near him stop what they're doing, surprised that someone as predictable as he is would take it to that extreme. He forces himself back up, ignoring the hand that some generous soul offers him. He hurries from the crowded hallway and into the third floor bathroom, staring at his reflection in the scratched mirror.
'It isn't even made of glass,' He finds himself thinking as he reaches a shaking hand towards his warped reflection. When he comes into contact with the cool material, he jerks back, aware that he is not dreaming. Tweek Tweak really did stand up in the lunchroom and declare that, yes, he sucks dick, thankyouverymuch, and no, he does not care what uninvented words that Cartman has for him.
Craig Tucker isn't entirely sure why the news feels as shocking as it does to him, nor why it leaves his stomach feeling light and spinning on its axis. All Craig knows is that Tweek looked damn proud of himself when he said that he sucked dick, a secret smile indicating that his words were not just a metaphor.
Craig is also unsure of why that makes his jeans uncomfortably tight, but pushes the thought from his mind, refusing to delve into it at this point in time, and makes his way back to his class, a bit late, a careful look of indifference on his face.
The second wave of shock isn't as forceful as the one that overtook him nearly a year ago, but it still knocks the breath out of him. He's sitting in the courtyard, Kenny McCormick eating his potato salad while he doodles with one hand, a cigarette dangling from his other hand. Clyde Donovan and Token Black sit across from them, Token patiently explaining some math formula that Clyde cannot comprehend. Craig's eyes had landed on Tweek, a few tables over, leaning forward to plant a kiss on Butters Fucking Stotch's cheek.
"Control your woman." Craig snaps when he can breathe again, successfully halting the conversation at his table.
Kenny arches an eyebrow and follows his gaze, snorting when he sees the two blonds flirting openly. "He's not my anything." Kenny launches back, though his smile doesn't quite reach his eyes.
Token rolls his eyes, a fan of just being straightforward about feelings, but chooses to withhold his typical lecture. Clyde remains oblivious, still trying to figure out his Algebra II homework.
Craig shoves his tray completely in front of Kenny and leaves the table, almost forgetting to flick the butt of his cigarette away before entering, the smell of melted filter lingering on his fingers long after lunch hour ends.
The third wave of shock hits him with renewed force.
Craig sits outside of Tweek Bros, puffing on a menthol cigarette. He hadn't been expecting the day to be anything but average, and he hadn't really showed up at the coffee shop for a caffeine fix; no, he'd been looking for Tweek. Not to talk to him, but to observe him.
Craig had found out partway through Junior year that Tweek was almost serene at Tweek Bros. It was an accident, but for the sake of science, Craig made it a point to randomly drop by to see if that calm smile and lack of shaking was still present.
Today had been one of those random days, but Tweek had not been inside. So Craig had ventured outside and lit a cigarette, trying to push away the feeling of disappointment that he still could not be troubled to explain whenever it was linked to Tweek.
Actually, Craig couldn't be bothered to explain any of his feelings in regards to Tweek. The blond had a tendency to draw out more emotions in Craig than he was used to allowing himself to feel.
Craig startled when Tweek dropped down beside him, rubbing at the blond stubble on his cheeks. Tweek had a white bandana wrapped around his head, a few blond tufts poking out from beneath it, and he was chewing on the flat end of his labret spike. He also had a ring through his left eyebrow, both courtesy of Kenny.
He raises his pierced eyebrow at Craig's cigarette. "Can I get a hit of that?" He asks, his voice deeper than Craig remembered.
"I didn't know you smoked." Craig states, but stretches his hand out towards Tweek.
Instead of taking the cigarette like Craig expects him to, Tweek leans forward and wraps his lips around the filter, grazing Craig's calloused fingers with his soft lips. He peeks up at Craig through his light colored eyelashes, his look an implausible hybrid of innocence and raw lust.
That's when the wave of shock slams into Craig, and he momentarily forgets how to breathe. When Tweek coughs, apparently not the seasoned smoker that Craig somehow knew he couldn't be, Craig draws himself back to the moment, away from the memory of Tweek confessing his sexual orientation.
"I don't," Tweek manages between hacking up his lungs.
Craig snorts. "Obviously," He says, rolling his eyes. He thinks of asking Tweek why he came outside, if not to bum a smoke from Craig, considers asking how Tweek came to discover his sexuality, or, for a fraction of a millisecond, if Tweek would like to do some of his aforementioned dick sucking to Craig.
Craig stands quickly, shoves his hands into his pockets and barrels away from Tweek before the words can slip out of his mouth.
Tweek's laughter follows him long after he's out of hearing range.
The fourth time the shock hits him, he is seated outside of the high school, his graduation program clenched tightly in his fist.
Tweek got Valedictorian, something that had shocked Wendy, Kyle, and Butters, who had never stopped to consider that anyone else could come close to shining with them. Without the outbursts that had plagued Tweek as a child, he tended to fly under the radar, unless he was standing up on tables declaring that he likes sucking dick.
The memory hits Craig now, seated in the burning Colorado heat, while Tweek speaks, his speech seemingly written in Sharpie on his forearm, because of course it is.
"If you're anything like me, people will underestimate you. They will spend their time torturing you, calling you names, shoving you in lockers, making you feel inferior. But if you're anything like me, you'll stand up for yourself, be it by telling them that you won't stand for it, or dramatically, like I did. You don't have to be gay to be spectacular, but it doesn't hurt." He says, his eyes seeming to glitter with mischief. Tweek straightens and pulls up his other sleeve, moving on to the second part of his speech apparently. "The thing is, I was lucky. I was one of those people that was okay with who I am, and that's not easy for everyone to be. Our whole lives we go through these motions, and it is my opinion that once you get finding and accepting yourself out of the way, then you can have fun, because nothing else matters. As long as you are you, there's no need to struggle anymore. As long as you love yourself, who gives a f—flip who doesn't accept you? Loving yourself takes that power away from people who don't accept you, and then, then you can take on the world."
The speech is a bit disjointed, a little confusing, but it came from Tweek, so this is both expected and oddly satisfying. Craig finds himself standing and clapping for Tweek, and the blond's gray eyes settle on him, a smile playing over his thin lips.
Others stand and join him, and they make it through the rest of the ceremony without much complication. Cartman got down on his knees when it was his turn to collect his diploma, begging Wendy to stop being a 'stupid hippie ho bitch' and be 'his hippie ho bitch', which apparently are two different things. Craig thinks that she would be conforming to the first statement by being with him, but what does he know.
Part of him thinks that Tweek's words are what inspired this exchange, since Cartman is sweating like a pig and isn't wearing his ass-kissing suit, just some jeans and a t-shirt under his gown.
Surprisingly, Wendy nods from where she stands behind Bebe, waiting to collect her diploma.
Unsurprisingly, Kyle joins Stan in line and finally kisses him, something that people had been betting on most of their lives. Stan looks equal parts pleased and surprised, because of course he is.
For some reason, everyone is suddenly moving, pairing off and confessing feelings like the Earth may cease to exist if they don't, graduation forgotten.
Craig catches Tweek's gaze as he moves back to his seat next to Craig, and flashes him a wide smile.
"Guess your speech was pretty damn inspirational." Craig says, tilting his head at Tweek's excited expression. He's sitting on the edge of the metal folding chair, both knees jiggling.
"That or it was the E I spiked everyone's coffee with this morning. You'd be more cuddly if you actually drank coffee." Tweek says, his smile spreading to show off his pearly white teeth.
Craig opens his mouth to ask if Tweek is bullshitting him, but decides that it doesn't really matter.
The final wave of shock hits him as he stands outside of Butter's apartment.
He'd come to surprise Kenny after having avoided South Park for over three years. He hadn't planned on coming back, but his father had fallen ill and his mother needed his help, so here he was.
He figured that Kenny and Butters were banging since they lived together, but obviously he was wrong.
Unless he was dreaming, that was Tweek in Butters arms, not Kenny.
He ducks down under the window, his heart racing. He feels sick to his stomach, and it shocks him that he hadn't figured out sooner that he had a thing for Tweek.
He hears the front door open, and Tweek steps onto the porch, his eyes squinting as he makes out Craig's figure.
"Dude, when did you get back?" He asks, stepping of the ledge and moving towards Craig. Craig stand quickly and puts several feet between them, his mind still reeling.
"Yesterday," He mumbles, ignoring the confused look on Tweek's face.
"Oh," Tweek says, his voice guarded. "I thought you would have stopped by the coffee shop."
Craig feels like running away from Tweek, sorting through his muddled feelings on his own. It hurts that Tweek is taken, taken by fucking Butters of all people.
"I thought you'd be single." He snips, surprising both of them.
Tweek's eyebrows fly up, and he lets out a laugh, one that is oddly similar to Kenny's. "Wow," He says, igniting Craig's temper.
He didn't come here to get laughed at. He came here to get drunk with Kenny, who didn't even have the decency to tell him that Tweek was fucking Butters.
He turns on his heel and heads away from the apartment, anger boiling through his blood.
He hears Tweek's shoes pounding on the pavement as he runs to catch up with him. He grabs Craig's shoulder and spins him around, planting his lips on Craig's harshly.
"Get off." Craig growls, pushing him back. Tweek frowns, his eyes flashing with hurt.
"I thought you liked me." He says softly, staring at his shoes.
Craig's eyebrows lift. "What does that matter? You're with Butters." He says, his voice uncertain.
Tweek laughs and shakes his head. "That's gross."
"But, you were hugging him like..." Craig trails off, trying to convey the emotion in the embrace he found them in.
"Like he just bought me tickets to LA?" Tweek says, blushing as he stares at something in the distance.
"LA?" Craig asks, wondering why nothing is making sense.
"He and Kenny got tired of me pining for you." Tweek confesses, meeting Craig's eyes bashfully. "No one knew that you were here." He explains, moving closer to Craig.
Craig nods slowly, accepting this new information. "So, you're single then?" He asks, tension falling from his body when Tweek nods. "Not anymore." He says gruffly, seizing Tweek and kissing him like he should have that day he stood up on the lunchroom table and said that he likes sucking dick.
Better late than never, he supposes.
His own sexual preference was just as shocking as Tweek's had been to him, but somehow, he thinks that it wouldn't have been as amazing if he'd figured it out sooner.
