Disclaimer: Hail to thee JK Rowling, hail to thee.
Rated PG-13: Some swearing and…interesting pastimes
AN: When I finished writing Ron's journal I couldn't help but feel disappointed. Especially because the fifth book made it not true at all. Which brings me to the point that this journal does NOT follow the fifth book that JK wrote! It follows Ron's journal, because it is a companion piece. There are a few things I put in there that follow the fifth book, but otherwise it coincides with Ron's take on things. Now, I proudly present you with:
The Rather Well Kept Inner Thoughts of One Hermione E. Granger
September 1st, Monday
7:10 a.m.
School has finally started! After a horrible and tense summer worrying about Harry, we're finally back at Hogwarts. With Dumbledore around I know we're all safe.
Although I have to admit that spending quality time with Ron was actually quite pleasant.
7:14 a.m.
When he wasn't talking about Quidditch.
7:17 a.m.
Which he only did once or twice. And when he did mention it, he'd stop and change the subject, then apologize for talking about something I wasn't particularly interested in.
7:23 a.m.
He really can be sweet sometimes, can't he?
7:32 a.m.
Just because he can be occasionally sweet, this certainly does not mean under ANY circumstances that I fancy him! Because when he's not being sweet he's the most insensitive wart I've ever known!
7:41 a.m.
Must remember that for later.
September 2nd, Tuesday
7:07 a.m.
I have the distinct feeling that if Harry didn't force Ron awake he would sleep right through the Second Coming of Voldemort.
3:34 p.m.
Harry and I were innocently sitting in the Great Hall eating lunch, when Ron burst in with a triumphant look on his face.
Some second year asked him out.
He turned her down, but was very proud about the whole ordeal.
3:46 p.m.
I don't see why. She was just a second year.
3:51 p.m.
A second year, and a compulsive thumb sucker at that.
3:57 p.m.
Why am I insulting this poor girl? She's actually quite nice, although by no means fit to go out with Ron.
4:02 p.m.
Nobody's fit to go out with Ron.
4:08 p.m.
NOT BECAUSE I FANCY HIM THOUGH!
4:17 p.m.
Harry got asked out by three different girls today, and Ron looked as though he'd been hit with an Unforgivable.
I imagined how he would look if I told him that I was one of those girls.
4:21 p.m.
Hahahaha.
September 3rd, Wednesday
2:09 p.m.
RONALD WEASLEY IS THE MOST INSUFFERABLE BOY ON THE FACE OF THE PLANET! Not only is he immature, but he's stubborn, and, and, antagonistic! I know that he and Malfoy have mutual hatred for each other, but that is NO reason to turn the boy into a toad!
Ron said that Malfoy deserved it, because he is the King of all Prats.
2:13 p.m.
Which is not a funny insult.
2:17 p.m.
At all.
September 4th, Thursday
5:30 p.m.
I have to decided to forgive Ron for his behavior towards Malfoy. He is a boy, after all, and after being best friends with two of them for five years you would think I should know better. Boys cause the stress in my life.
5:34 p.m.
Look! It caused me a strange and choppy run-on!
5:38 p.m.
I agreed to play chess with Ron as an offer of peace. He beat me.
Of course.
He thought it was funny.
I thought that he was could just spend the night on the couch.
5:52 p.m.
Why would he spend the night on the couch though? It's not as if the two of us are sleeping in the same bed, or married or something, and he did something incredibly horrid which would make me force him to sleep on the couch like angry wives sometimes do to punish their husbands, because I most certainly DO NOT want to be married to Ronald Weasley or even THINK about sharing a bed with him!
6:00 p.m.
He made me write a run-on sentence again!
6:04 p.m.
If I wasn't such a kind and forgiving person I would scold him for putting so much distraction in my life. After all, before I met Ron I did not tell boys to sleep on the couch for beating me at chess, I did not insult second year girls for asking someone out, and I most certainly did NOT write run-on sentences!
6:11 p.m.
I must ask Harry for advice. He isn't like Ron at all. He listens, and he understands, and he, he doesn't cause me to write run-ons! Harry is absolutely perfect boyfriend material in every way.
6:24 p.m.
Although I think that I would rather fail every one of my O.W.L.s than kiss Harry in a romantic sense.
6:29 p.m.
Well, maybe only half my O.W.L.s.
6:37 p.m.
I wonder how many I'd be willing to fail before I would kiss Ron…
6:42 p.m.
Must not think about that.
September 5th, Friday
2:10 p.m.
I told Parvati and Lavender about how many O.W.L.s you would be willing to fail before kissing a certain person. We spent half the night composing a list.
For example: I would rather fail all of my exams than kiss Malfoy, while Parvati and Lavender both agree that his good looks make up for his evil.
When will they learn that just because a person is good looking on the outside that doesn't make up for their ugly heart? If somebody truly is a good person, than won't they end up looking great just because of the wonderful person they are?
3:03 p.m.
On a lighter note they did agree that Harry was rather good looking. If looks were based on kindness he would be the best looking bloke on the planet.
3:06 p.m.
I suggested Ron.
3:11 p.m.
They refused to say anything, and stared at me in a mixture of suspicion and fear.
3:18 p.m.
I wouldn't have minded if they had said what they truly thought of him! Either way, it's their opinion, and they should know that I support other people making decisions for themselves.
3:24 p.m.
Oh, I hope they weren't silent because they think that I fancy Ron.
3:26 p.m.
Because I don't!
5:49 p.m.
Fred and George were singing some incredibly odd song, that I only caught a word or two of. They stopped as soon as I entered the common room and Ron turned crimson.
5:53 p.m.
It was something about love…
5:58 p.m.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH EVERYBODY!?
September 6th, Saturday
9:30 a.m.
I can't deny that I am very glad it's the weekend. All the students sleep in, and most go about their own devices. Stressful things hardly ever happen on the weekends.
11:11 a.m.
Ron is in an awfully grouchy mood. Harry keeps laughing at him.
11:16 a.m.
Sometimes I get the feeling that Harry is much more devious than he appears to be.
September 10th, Wednesday
8:41 a.m.
The teachers have been giving out so much homework that even I'm tempted to complain.
Then again, the O.W.L.s are a very important part of the learning process, I mean, these will determine where we can go in life. I think it would be just awful to not make quite enough and be forced to do something you hated for a living.
Poor Harry. As an Auror he'll have to pass nearly all of his classes.
9:14 a.m.
I talked briefly with Seamus Finnigan and Dean Thomas. Seamus said that whenever anything goes wrong in his life, he just shakes his fist at the ceiling and yells, "Damn you Salazar!"
He said it's because Salazar Slytherin was a filthy git and running away from Hogwarts subsequently caused everything wrong here to be his fault.
9:27 a.m.
I'll have to ask Harry if Seamus is always like this.
September 13th, Saturday
10:34 a.m.
The next visit to Hogsmeade is two weeks from today. Until then, I am bound to my homework.
September 15th, Monday
7:12 p.m.
Harry and I had supper together while Ron was off on a secret mission. I asked him if he started doing things completely uncharacteristic of himself after meeting Ron or I.
He shrugged and said that he acts as a counselor more often than he used to.
7:18 p.m.
The Boy Who Lived and Gave Advice.
7:22 p.m.
Ron showed up in the common room unexpectedly, covered in dirt. After taking a shower he borrowed Harry's invisibility cloak and nicked some food from the kitchens. He flatly refused to talk to the elves about S.P.E.W. for me, so I asked if I could go along.
He looked at me oddly. "Do you have a death wish or something?"
"I've never died walking under the cloak with you before."
Then he let out a knowing sigh and clicked his tongue. "Hermione, the elves are incredibly nice and timid little creatures, but I'm sure that even they can harbor homicidal tendencies." With that he left the common room.
Just like that!
I turned to complain to Harry, but he looked amused. "I think he's finally got the impression down."
8:36 p.m.
Boys.
September 18th, Thursday
9:37 a.m.
After careful consideration I have agreed with Harry and Ron that our Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher could do well with some psychiatric help.
Maybe Lockhart could send her to a nice place.
9:22 p.m.
Parvati would rather fail one O.W.L. than kiss Lockhart, Lavender two, and I went with half. He's the prime example of a good-looking bloke with absolutely no brain at all.
9:29 p.m.
This caused us to go and rate our other D.A.D.A. professors. Parvati is the first number, then Lavender, and I'm last.
Quirrel: Every single one. Ick.
Moody: Every single one again. Ick.
Lockhart: 1, 2, 4
Lupin: After a rather giggly moment, we all decided that we would kiss Professor Lupin without being coerced in the least. Yes, he may be a werewolf, but he is awfully nice, and rather good looking. It's a shame really that he's twice our age.
September 20th, Saturday
1:26 p.m.
Malfoy called me an ugly Mudblood at lunch today, and Ron nearly hexed him straight through the ceiling. He (Ron) got us twenty points off Gryffindor, and a detention, and still tried to rip Malfoy's head off.
I don't mind the points taken off at all. He's still fuming about it in a rather sweet way.
Sometimes it's nearly impossible not to like him.
1:33 p.m.
NEARLY.
September 22nd, Monday
11:47 p.m.
Ron had his detention tonight, so I stayed up late until he came back. After all, if he wouldn't have leapt to my defense than he wouldn't have gotten in trouble. He accepted the tea I handed over and after drinking looked at me more seriously than he ever has before.
"Don't let him get to you Hermione. Malfoy, he says those things just because he's alone in the world, and he knows it, which makes him bitter. He just insults you out of pure bitterness and jealousy, because being petty makes him feel better about himself. Don't believe him when he insults you. Ever. You're a wonderful, beautiful person, understand?"
I couldn't say anything. It was all I could do to nod, hug him, and not burst into hysterical sobbing.
11:55 p.m.
There's really no reason to fight this anymore.
11:58 p.m.
I LOVE RON WEASLEY!
September 25th, Thursday
5:00 p.m.
The trip to Hogsmeade is only two days away!
5:12 p.m.
Oh dear Merlin. Fred and George kept giving me suggestive looks in the common room and waggled their eyebrows like they had furry caterpillars on their foreheads or something. I simply do not understand how the rest of the Weasleys have survived with them thus far.
September 26th, Friday
6:32 p.m.
Parvati, Lavender, and I all agree that we would rather fail every O.W.L. given to us than kiss Snape. We then got embroiled in a large debate over Fred and George. Seeing as how I would not really like to have a snog with anybody except a…certain…person…I tried to get out of it, but finally admitted that if my heart were not otherwise engaged I would kiss one or the other freely. They agreed.
September 27th, Saturday
8:16 a.m.
Hogsmeade, here we come!
4:53 p.m.
HARRY'S BROOMSTICK!
The trip to Hogsmeade today started out normally enough before it morphed into…into…oh dear…
5:14 p.m.
So, we went into Hogsmeade today, and seeing as it was quite chilly we made our way towards the Three Broomsticks. Ron went quite overboard with the Butterbeer and had a total of twelve. It's not very strong, but if you drink twelve, then, well, side effects are bound to happen. I tried to limit myself, but had just enough to become bold. Much too bold.
Harry got and went to the restroom, leaving a not very lucid Ron and I sitting together. We started talking about Flobberworms or some of nonsense, then all of a sudden we were kissing, but pulled apart rather quickly muttering and blushing and trying to act normal when Harry joined us at the table again, and I'm sure that Ron won't be able to remember any of this tomorrow and I've been pretending that I was under the influence just as much as him, when in truth I was feeling quite fine but I really wanted to snog him, and now I can't look him in the face because my lie is utterly embarrassing me and I'm writing run-on sentences again!
My life is vastly complicated.
7:23 p.m.
Perhaps I could run away with Professor Lupin after all. Despite the difference in age and the fact that we don't love each other. They are completely unimportant factors.
7:31 p.m.
DAMN YOU SALAZAR!
8:42 p.m.
That actually does feel quite marvelous. Although the reason I am so distracted is not because of Salazar Slytherin.
9:01 p.m.
Why does he have to be such a bloody good kisser?
September 28th, Sunday
1:48 p.m.
Poor Ron woke up with the most horrible hangover this morning. Butterbeer must have some sort of strange magical properties that linger until the morning after you drink it. Fred and George would simply not stop pestering him, so I suggested he take a shower, and then set a goblet of pumpkin juice next to his favorite chair.
I spent the time while he was in the shower in the library looking up spells to help his horrid headache, and was ready to cast it as he finished the last of his pumpkin juice.
2:34 p.m.
Harry approached me and asked in a desperate sort of way if I could help him ask Ginny to the Halloween Ball.
I told him yes, although I personally think that if he just walked up to her shyly, hands twisting his robes around, she couldn't possibly refuse him. When Harry is nervous he is quite possibly one of the most adorable blokes to grace the planet Earth.
September 29th, Monday
7:54 p.m.
I must look like a matchmaker, because the twins pulled me aside after dinner and asked me to help them ask Angelina and Alicia to the Halloween Ball.
"Why? You had no trouble asking Angelina to the Yule Ball last year."
"Yes, well, that was last year," Fred said, obviously trying to make a point that I simply wasn't getting. The both of them looked so uncharacteristically serious that I agreed to help them.
8:09 p.m.
Parvati and Lavender both waved me over shortly after Fred and George had finished groveling and I nearly screamed, thinking that they too, wanted help finding dates to the ball.
"So who am I supposed to find for you two?" I asked.
They gave me confused looks.
Then a flicker of realization crossed Parvati's face. "No, we've already got dates. What we really wanted to do was offer to help you get ready for the ball this year so it doesn't take quite so long."
"Yes," Lavender added. "Besides, out the whole school the two of us have the most sense when it comes to fashion, so you would be one of the best dressed girls at the ball."
Normally I would decline out of protest, declaring that I had no need to feel well dressed or pretty. Their offer seemed heartfelt enough though, and, well, I wouldn't say no to turning a head or two. Specifically one with red hair…
October 1st, Wednesday
7:47 a.m.
I heard that Dumbledore will officially announce the Halloween Ball during breakfast tomorrow morning. I find that quite funny seeing as how the entire school knows already and are (quite clearly) agonizing over dates.
8:36 p.m.
Ooh, Fred and George are HORRID! When I walked into the common room after supper they told me story about Ron admitting to being madly in love with me, or some sort of equal nonsense. Poor Ron was so flustered, that he couldn't say anything in his defense.
For their absolutely disgraceful behavior, I yelled at them loudly that they could find dates on their own. For once in their lives the twins looked shocked. Ha.
The rest of the students in the tower were laughing loudly, and I caught Harry, doubled up with laughter. Nice way to be sympathetic to a best friend, Harry! If he wants to go to the ball with Ginny than he can come up with a plan on his own, that dirty, rotten…
8:52 p.m.
I've just realized that if Ginny truly fancies Harry then my outburst will have helped rather than hindered.
9:04 p.m.
Damn. It.
~~~~~~~~~
Next chapter to come out soon. Good things come to those who wait. ^_^ A review or two would be greatly appreciated.
