Prologue
Thinking Back
I sat here alone as thinking, alone, on my 30th birthday. I tried to ignore the hole of my wound of hurt from the past 13 years. On my disatorous 18th birthday, my love of my life, carelessly told me that he didn't love me, and he was leaving forever.
What he did not realize was the pain that he had left behind. Worst of all, he had left me behind pregnant. He told me that vampire's could not concieve, but look at me now. I came to the conclusion that every school he went to, he faked a relationship, and left for them to strive alone with his child.
My father had kicked me out, because of my depression, and for getting pregnant.
The first few months were full of hell and emptyness. We lived in an abandoned house for the first few months, and I had a part- time job at a local Dixie Lee as a waitress. But I knew I could not afford to care for my daughter alone. Soon after, I discovered that Renesme was a half- human half- vampire. She could eat either human food or blood. I had recieved an idea that Renesme could turn me, but her teeth would not do the trick.
Excellent, my daughter could live forever and be beautiful, and I had to watch her as I grew older and older.
I came to the cessation that this was my life, I had decided to make out with Edward, and I got pregnant because of this.
My depression grew worse and worse, but I fought through it for my daughter. I had to live for her. Every once in a while she would catch me bellowing in agony, and her chocolate brown eye's, bronze hair, dimples, and that charming smirk always made me feel happy. It always filled a little of the hole, filled with sorrow, back up with self- esteem and happiness.
One day, I was out grocery shopping for a few water bottles for Renesme's blood, and food for me, and I spotted Jake. Renesme was in the cart singing to herself as she fiddled with the straps of the seat.
Jake was with Sam and Emily doing what I did not know what and his bright flash of sunshine of a smile soared into me, and I fell in love. He seemed to notice my blushing cheeks and came over to me.
"Bella, who is this lovely young lady?" He asked as he used one of his giant fingers, to shake Renesme's tiny hand. "Oh! What a grip you have!"
Renesme giggled, as I did too.
"Hey Jake, this is Renesme Carlie Swan." I answered as I played with Renesme's hair. Her bronze hair looked like a fountain of brown from the ponytail on top of her head.
"S- Swan." Jake stuttered as his big brown eyes stared at me in confusion.
"Yes, she is my daughter." I said as I smiled mildly.
"Really! With who? How come Charlie never mentioned anything to Billy?"
I shuddered at that haunting name and answered. "Um... Edward's. And he well, um, kicked me out."
Jake's expressioned turned into a hard line and he started shaking. "Edward did this too you? But they left! How could he kick you out!"
I jumped back at his apparent yelling.
"'Cause of my depression, and I was pregnant with his daughter."
"Where are you living now?" His brows lifted in wonderement.
"Well, basically a shed with no light or electricity, and it's in the forest."
"Why do you live like that? You can live with me? I would love the company." Jake said enthustiacally as he hugged Renesme.
"Um..What about Charlie and Billy?" I asked as I picked up a bag of chips.
"I live on my own in Seattle. I well.. I bought a lottery ticket in Seattle, and I won $250, 000. I told the cashier I was 18 and he gave me the money. Billy and I don't get along that well anymore, so I moved out and bought a bungalow in the country of Seattle."
"Wow. You have grown up so much." I said as I took his hand.
This felt so right, I felt so happy for the first time in three months.
"You are really warm." I said.
"Well, remember I told you about the werewolves, well I am one."
"Really. No wonder you are so tall."
"Wow, Bella. You are taking this all in pretty great."
"I have been pretty monotone since, you know, he left." I answered nervously.
He patted my hand, don't worry I will neve leave you. Ever." He answered and leaned in for a kiss.
10 years later...
Those words haunted me ever since he had imprinted on Sam's kniece, Kayley. He had left me with his house, money, children. All except for him.
Jacob and I were planning to get married this summer before my 30th birthday, but Sam had a family barbeque and he invited the wolves as well.
We were sitting as a great big family, our golden retriever, Rusty, was also invited to the event. Our son Alex Jacob, who was born a year after Nessie, was sitting on Jacobs lap, and I was holding our three year old daughter Amelia Alice. The pack excepted Nessie without a fight and they loved he rpale skin, adoring smirk, and her chocolate brown eyes. The only thing that bothered them deeply was that she hunted. But they soon got over it when she began hunting with the pack.
The doorbell rang and I sat Mia down on the ground with Emily and Sam's daughter Denise and I answered it. It was Sam's brother, wife and daughter. They introduced themselves as Logan, Reagan, and Kayley.
We walked throught there house and to there outside backyard. I was coming to give Jacob a kiss, and he got up to which I thought he was coming to me. But he passed me with apolegetic eyes and he went to see Kayley.
Three years later...
Now, I am raising our children on our own. Jake had imprinted on Kayley, who is now 11, and left to live with her.
Mia, who is now three, and Alex who is now 12, attend Seattle public school. Nessie had skipped a grade and is attending Seattle High School.
Everyday I am off from my part- time job as a psw in a local retirment home, I sit home and cry to my self. I had gotten no where in life, and now I am a single mother of three children, and turning thirty in a couple of days. I am so depressed, everyday the memory of Jake walking to Kayley, makes me weep and makes the hole in my chest deeper and deeper everytime.
I try to convince myslef that there is another person out there, but who would that be?
