Yeah. I was board, so I thought of this little thing in between my AP chapters. Not really a Snape/Lily person, since I would want Harry to be alive, but I've been looking at too many DH spoiler scenes… um… leave a review!
Disclaimer: I don't own HP or any related characters or situations.
Rumors
Severus Snape dashed down the hallway, his Hogwarts robes rippling behind him. His head craned left and right, but he could not see any sign of red hair. He had to know. He had to find out if it was true…
All day, he had heard whispers, mentionings around the school, but he didn't want to believe them. He merely shrugged them off as meaningless rumors. That is, until James Potter bumped into him.
"Well, well, if it isn't Snivullus. Look, sorry about Evens, but you had your shot with her for six years. And now it's finally my turn."
As his black hair whipped around him, his brain seemed to move faster then he did. Potter was such a git, he knew that, but what if there could possibly be some merit behind what he was saying? What if they actually were…?
He had to know, and the only way to know for sure was from the source. But where in the bloody hell was Lily?
Suddenly, as he was rounding a corner, he saw her. She was bending over a water fountain, pushing her orange hair to the side.
"Lily!" She looked up, surprised to see him run up to her so urgently. "I need to talk to you," he panted. Her expression became cold.
"So, you talk to mudbloods now?" she sniffed.
"Lily I mean it! We really need to talk!"
She looked at him with her almond, green eyes as if trying to crack a code. Finally, she caved.
"Fine," she said, "just make it quick."
So, he took her by the arm and led her around the corner where no one could see them.
"Look," he said desperately, "I have to know."
"Know what?"
He felt his breathing become harder. "I have to know… if…"
There was a pause. Severus was so eager to get to her, but know when it came down to it, he didn't even want to say it.
"If what, Severus?" she asked, clearly impatient.
"If you… you and…" He stopped and took a breath. "If you and Potter are… dating now."
Her hard expression softened a bit. She held her other arm and averted her eyes. She didn't need to answer to make Severus' heart sink like a stone.
"Yes," she said after a while. "We are."
Severus felt himself shaking. So it really was true. For once in his life, Potter had told the truth. He guessed he knew this before he had even asked the question, he just didn't want to realize it. Still, her answer somewhat shocked him.
"But… why?" was all he could say.
She shifted her feet, still not looking at him.
"Well, he's… I know he's a jerk, but… he really is a good guy, once you get to know him. He's funny and cute and easy to hang out with…"
Severus tried to swallow the lump in his throat with no luck. Some of his helplessness turned to frustration.
"So… you – you like him because he's cute? Or funny?" He gritted his teeth as his mere frustration turned into boiling anger. "What about me? Don't you like to hang out with me? Don't I make you laugh?"
"Y-yes, but… you and I are friends…"
Tears welled in his eyes as he took her by the shoulders and pinned her against the wall, forcing her to look at him.
"Dammit Lily!" he shouted, teeth bared. "Why can't you see? I've been here for you for six years! Not Potter! Me! He's too busy flaunting himself to be there for anybody! You're nothing to him! Don't you get it?" He was now raging uncontrollably. He could have been hurting her, he didn't know. Right now he was blind to everything else but his fury. Tears streamed down his hot face. "He doesn't really love you! All he loves is himself! He's too busy for anyone else but him!"
Suddenly, his regular vision clicked on.
Lily's face was in front of him, petrified at his outburst. She was standing stalk still, not even daring to breath. And her eyes, her doe-like, green eyes were staring at him, brimming with shining tears. Severus' anger ebbed away.
His grip on her arms were tighter then he had intended. Gently, he took his hands away and instead placed his palms against the wall. He bowed his head so that his black bangs didn't show his shameful face.
"I'm sorry…" he whispered. "I just… I just hate the thought of… of you with someone else… especially with Potter… I just can't handle it…"
He was breathing heavily, his hair ends dancing as he huffed. He should tell her. Right now, he should tell her what he wanted to all these years.
Slowly, he moved his head upwards so as to see her face. Tears trickled down her cheeks, but she was no longer in shock. Now she had a look of almost pity on her face. Gulping, he moved his face closer to her.
The only thought that was running through his mind was that he had nothing to loose. So, he pressed his lips on hers. Only a few seconds past until she pushed him away.
"Severus…" she said. "I'm sorry. But like I said… I'm with James now… you can't just-"
"Then leave him."
"What?"
He moved his hands to her face. "Leave him. Please Lily… he could never love you like I do…"
"Severus," she said, moving his hands away, "I can't just leave him. And love? We're only sixteen."
"So? Who cares how old we are?"
"No, Severus."
"Then… then if things don't work out between you two…?"
She sighed and eased him away from her. "Severus, please understand. I love you, I really do, but… as a brother. I'm so sorry… I just don't… feel the same…"
He could feel his world crumbling away. Lily, his dear friend… his one and only… was breaking his heart. He didn't blame her, of course, but he still felt like the ground beneath him was just falling through. He could barely stand it. His tears began to replenish, but he didn't care. He took her hands.
"Please… I'm begging you…"
She took her hands away.
"I'm late for class," she said. And with that, she turned and left him.
He felt light headed and dizzy; as if this were some kind of dream. He wished it was. But he was forced to except the reality. He pressed his forehead to where she was currently and started crying. He couldn't stop, either. He sank down to the ground and started to wail. He pounded on the wall, shouted, screamed, nothing was effective. Tears and snot streaked down his face, and he didn't bother to wipe them. No one went down the hall, so no one was around to see him in such a state. He was never so glad to be alone.
As the sun went down, his sobbing had stopped, but he did not return to his house. He would later be found by a teacher and given a detention and deducted ten points. Later still he would be cornered and ridiculed by James when Lily was not around. And even later, he would discover that Lily Evens had become Lily Potter and was with child. And later still he would find a letter from James Potter himself apologizing for what he did to him at school, which Severus disregarded completely.
Yes, Severus would later discover all of these things. But right then at that moment, he did not care what the future held for him. All that registered was that his chance at happiness was leaving him along with the setting sun.
Yeah, I know, sappy. Don't blame me! Blame the angsty/cutesy Snape/Lily fan art on DeviantART! Okies, leave a review!
