Charles Charles's Revenge
By Mad-Pac
Previously on Pushing Daisies...
Ned and his friends had just solved the Merle McQuoddy mystery, but Charles Charles had problems of his own to think about. After confronting Ned about the situation involving his daughter, Charles made Chuck choose between Ned and him. He was sure she would choose her father and recapture all the time they had lost. But Charles was wrong, and she chose her childhood sweetheart, the pie maker.
Angry and frustrated, Charles Charles decided not to wait a minute longer. He went away, just leaving in Ned's apartment a note saying "I choose too" with the world map and a wooden spoon. But at least Charles didn't end empty-handed. He took Ned's car.
And now, the story...
Charles Charles was driving into the snowy night, and he was fuming. He'd just made off with Ned's stolen Mercedes, still uncertain of what to do next.
"Oh, my dear Button Button, how could you?" he thought. "How could you choose pie over cake? How could you refuse a chance of reconnecting with me after we had been so tragically separated?" Perplex and angry, Charles Charles was trying to gather this thoughts and plan a course of action. One thing was certain, though. He wanted revenge!
Not against his daughter, of course. Poor Charlotte was deluded. She was still an innocent child trapped in Ned's freak world. Charles wanted revenge against the man who had taken everything from him: his life, his dreams, and now his daughter. And he would make Ned pay.
He could kill Ned. Plain and simple. But then Ned could touch himself and come back to life. And then what if Ned could touch Charlotte after that? Charles couldn't allow that to happen.
Besides, Ned wasn't afraid of dying. What Ned really feared was being exposed for the freak he was. That explained Ned's compulsive obsession for the alive-again rules he tried to make Charles follow. But he had to bring Ned down without exposing Charlotte, and without looking responsible for that in the eyes of his sweet and somewhat ungrateful daughter. For that Charles had to think.
Charles then decided grab a bite; he would do better thinking with his stomach full. He stopped in front of a diner, Nighthawks diner, which was painted with bright red and yellow, Just like in an Edward Hopper painting. He parked and got in.
The place had a few patrons, a nicely dressed couple, both wearing hats, at a table. Another one had been taken by two elderly gentlemen, and another had a lady smoking a cigarette. But fortunately for Charles nobody seemed to notice him, even though his face was wrapped in bandages, and he was wearing dark glasses and a hat, pretty much like the Invisible Man from that classic movie.
He sat at a table, and the waitress came to him carrying a menu and a notepad. She started staring at Charles Charles.
"What are you looking at? I'm a burn victim!" he said rather curtly.
The girl just smiled and said, "Would you like to try our selection of pies? It's the specialty of the house."
"No pie," he barked. "Bring me a coffee and some cake, the best you have. Just don't care much for chocolate."
The girl bought him a slice of marron layer cake. Charles sank the fork in it and tasted: it was delicious. Even though it had a chocolate layer, it was a feast for a refined palate such as his. It was a delectable combination of chestnuts, chocolate, and yellow layer cake, with delicious frosting.
"That's why I like cake," Charles thought. "Layers and layers of surprises and adventures. Just like a man's life. In one layer he was a dedicated father. In another, a respectable war veteran. In another, a man who had come back from the dead. And in another, a man who was planning a revenge."
As he savored the delicious dessert, a plan was beginning to form in his head. But in order to make any plan work, Charles would need money, and he knew exactly where to get it.
He put some money on the table and left. The night was clear and a bit warmer now and it had stopped snowing. It was perfect for what he had in mind. He got into Ned's car and started driving. His next stop would be Coeur d' Coeurs.
Charles Charles parked across the street from the house where Vivian and Lily Charles now dwelled. The same house Charles still considered his.
The ladies hadn't been taking a good care of his house, or so he thought. He didn't like the heavy fence around it. When he lived there the colors were brighter and he made sure there was no fence, so it was a house anyone was welcome to. But there was no point in reminiscing; what happened, happened. Besides, he had a task to accomplish.
He got a shovel from the trunk and carefully walked to the house. He had to be extra careful when climbing that dreaded fence, as he shouldn't make any noise. It was interesting how his alive-again condition provided him with an exceptionally agile figure. It was just a pity he couldn't get his good looks back.
It was late at night and the sisters were already asleep, but of course it would be terrible if they saw him. Under normal circumstances, he would've avoided confronting his ex-fiancée and his ex-lover at the same time. Now it would be even harder to explain, corpse face and all.
He walked to the backyard and found the oak; it was still there. He then made ten steps, and started digging.
The facts were these. Years ago, Charles Charles, Dwight Dixon and Ned's father, while in service as blue berets during the War, stumbled across the Arabian Desert Treasure. Each of them took his share of the loot, at least what each could carry, and hid the rest.
Ned's father share was used to pay for Ned's expensive tuition at the Longborough School for Boys, and the rest was deposited in a estate that was subsequently inherited by Ned and used to fund the Pie Hole. Dixon spend his share foolishly with booze and women and soon had to resort to his usual life of crimes. And Charles Charles was the only one who saved for a rainy day, and guess what, it was raining. Metaphorically, of course.
However, the share that each of them took of the treasure dimmed in comparison to what had been left behind. Unable to carry all that fortune, the three men hid it, and divided the secret to unlock the treasure's location among themselves. And the secret was in the pocket watches each of them would carry. The three men agreed to come back after the War, take the rest of the treasure, and live happily ever after as three rich men.
Meanwhile fate interfered, as it usually has the habit of doing. Soon, Dwight Dixon went to jail and served a long sentence. Charles Charles died, and Ned's father simply disappeared for mysterious reasons leaving three lonely sons behind.
Charles's shovel hit something hard, breaking his dreams of richness and revenge. There it was: the metal crate he'd been undigging. Now Ned's fate was sealed.
At that very moment a familiar sensation took over him. He started falling and felt he was gliding. Was he dying again? No, not again! That was not fair!
But he soon came to. He looked up and saw a figure against the moonlight sky and holding a tire iron he had used to hit Charles's skull. There was a full moon so Charles could see clearly who it was.
"You? So we meet again. That's not a way to greet an old war buddy!"
"Cut the crap, Charles. I think I'll take this," said Ned's father, taking the box that had been buried.
"Come on. Don't be so greedy! Let's use this money to find Dixon and his watch, so we can get the treasure. There's enough for the three of us," said Charles Charles.
"You don't get it. I won't let you hurt my son. I'll stop you for good now. I need to atone for my sins."
"You have too many sins to atone for, buddy. It's too late for you."
"It might be, but it's not too late for my boy. I'll do whatever it takes to stop you, Charles."
At that very moment, lights were lit in the house. A voice could be heard.
"Who is it? I have a shotgun and I'm not afraid to use it," said a lady's voice.
"Well, Charles, I guess our story is not over. But we're going to resolve this sooner or later," said Ned's father as he disappeared with Charles's box into the night.
Charles Charles realized he had to go too. He ran away from there while he saw Lily's tiny but threatening and armed figure approach where they were.
Charles got to Ned's car and drove away. He really needed that money, but not all was lost. He still had options to carry on his plans. He still had an ace in his sleeve he realized it was the time to use now.
- 5 -
