Disclaimer: Sadly, I am not Erin Hunter, nor will I most likely ever will be. In full actuallity, Erin Hunter is Erin Hunter. If I haven't said Erin Hunter enough, I shall say it one more time. ERIN HUNTER. You see? I can count, no matter what mother says! MUHAHAHAHA!!!!! I am not crazy, by the way. I am just normal-challenged. So there. Ha. Ha. Hey, what does disclaimer mean? Oh well. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Ha. Ha. Hehe. Ho. Ahhh, awkward...

Heathertail: Hello, everybody, I'm Heathertail, and here's the game; Wheel. Of. TORTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yay! Uh.... Let's start with a random member of the audience. Please step up and I will explain all the rules.

Clan cats: (WindClan, ShadowClan, and RiverClan step backwards, leaving only ThunderClan, because they where to stupid to move)

Heathertail: Wow. That. Was. Dumb. Okaaaaay, so, I guess Firestar is up first.

Firestar: (speaks rapidly) OhmyStarClanIamontelivision!!!!!!!! HiMomandDad!!!!!!! Smudgeareyououtthere? Rockontothekittypets!!!!!

Heathertail: Um. Firestar? Did you have caffine?

Firestar: (in the same tone) Uh-huhuh-huhuh-huh!!!!!!! Isn'titgreat? Tigerstargaveittomeinadream!!!!!!!!!!! Monstersrock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEEEHAW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (starts foaming at the mouth a little)

Heathertail: Okaaaaaaaay...... I changed my mind. Brambleclaw, you're up!

Brambleclaw: (solemly walks up, pushing past everyone so he can smile at the camera) I floss every single day, I am not related to any kittypets, and I like looong walks on the lakeshore. (lifts and eyebrow up and down suggestively)

Squirrelflight: *AHEM*

Heathertail: I may have just picked the wrong Clan....... Oh well, let's get started. Brambleclaw, if you could just step up onto this table and let me strap you onto it. Yes, thank you, that fits nicely.

Brambleclaw: (moaning in pain) No it doesn't! These are kit cuffs!!!!!!!!!!!!! (continues yowling for his mommy)

Heathertail: Oops, did I forget to mention that? (grins evilly) Oh well. Now I will just spin you really quickly and we will see what you land on! Okay, where is my lovely assistant to spin this?

Lionblaze: Right here. (appears out from behind the table)

Heathertail: YOU! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE???!!!!

Lionblaze: Well, your lovely assistant couldn't make it, so I volunteered. (smiles lovingly)

Heathertail: SECURITY!

Breezepelt: You call?

Heathertail: After he spins the wheel, lock him up! I will personally claw his eyes out when this is over.

Lionblaze: (spins wheel, then marches out of the room, probably to get some flowers)

All Cats: Round and round and round he goes, where he stops, nobody knows!

Heathertail: Peering over the side. Wow, he is strong. That won't be done spinning for a while. Oh well, lets take a commercial break.

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Stoneteller: Tired of having to catch prey on the ground? Tired of all those long names your leader gives you? Tired of doing all the different chores, instead of getting good at one thing? Well come on down, to the Tribe of Falling Water! 223 Big Waterfall Drive.

Talon: (really, really fast) Restrictions may apply to prophetic warriors and when big scary sharpteeth come, you must fight.

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Heathertail: Aaaaand we're back to Wheel of Torture! When you left, Brambleclaw was still spinning. He has finally ended on (peers over edge of table) OH MY STARCLAN, YOU WILL LAUGH YOUR KITTY PANTS OFF! Brambleclaw has landed on "tear out your fur, and say to your true love you are dumping her for... (smuggles laughter) BLACKSTAR! Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!!!!!!!!!!!!

Brambleclaw: (horror painted all over his face) um..... she'll understand, I think, won't she?

Heathertail: Ah-ah-aaah. You must not tell her that this is part of the torture.

Brambleclaw: Okay....... (starts crying a little, but then straitens up, and walks over to Squirrelflight) Hey, you. Thats right, you mousebrain.

Squirrelflight: Brambleclaw, what is wrong?

Brambleclaw: There's nothing wrong but your brain to think I love you! Blackstar is the one meant for me!

Squirrelflight: Really? Cool. Thornclaw, I'm coming, baby!

Heathertail: You guys are both really harsh!

Brambleclaw: (sobbing) WAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Blackstar: You really mean it? YAY!!!! (faints)

Heathertail: Ummm, okay, I am going to pretend I haven't heard anything that just went on… I guess that is all for now! See you next time on, Wheel, of, Torture!!!!!!!!!!

Please r&r this. It's my first one and I would like to see how I did. Thanks! And remember, you can send in your votes for who we choose, and ideas for torture! I'll be back... Mwahahahahaha! (Yes, mother, I remember that I shoudn't laugh like a maniac in front of company......)