Couples Therapy: Sounds We Like To Hear


Author's Foreword:

Hey, everyone! Guess what! Yet another series is here! Giant robots that can transform into Earth stuff are having some issues with their loved ones and who is there to help them out? The psychologist Smokescreen!

One day C.M.D. and me were hanging out at a library and just talking about stuff, applying final touches to ScrewLoose when an idea struck me, why not have couples from Generation One go see Smokescreen? I see how it may not make that much sense ... but you should have seen her reaction to the idea! Priceless.

In any case, eventually I finally got down to writing the first chapter of this series and there you have it! Later I came up with the idea of group couples therapy so you should expect that come sometime soon in this series!

For now, enjoy the very first chapter!


"Hmm."

"Hmpf."

"Hrrmmf."

This was getting ridiculous... Two of the most noise-producing mechs to ever live were sitting there, angrily making incomprehensible noises at one another, while each was looking in their own direction.

"Bluestreak …"

"I am not talking to him! He just doesn't know when to shut up!"

"SAY WHAT?"

"Blaster, calm do…"

"You heard me! You just don't know shut up!"

"Wh…" The boom box's optics were nearly popping out of their sockets, "I dunno when to shut up?"

"No, you don't!" The car turned to the red mech with arms still crossed on his chest, "And what's more, you have no tact, no style of your own …"

Smokescreen turned off his audio receptors; even on their lowest setting it was still impossible to listen to this conversation. Face-palming, leaning back in his chair and putting his leg over the other, he was giving his mind a short respite in face of the source of the accusations.

"… wha'? You think you're any better? You …"

"… I am considerate and always let people speak! It is called manners …"

The psychologist was finding it increasingly hard to not slap his servo on his faceplates and cry. There was no way he could allow this to continue.

"… all right, both of you: one at a time. Here," the Datsun stood up, rolled over a board, took out a marker and drew a table, "Let's break all of this down. These two columns will be things that you like about Blaster and these two columns will be things you like about Bluestreak …"

"Is all of this really necessary?" The gunner's doorwings were projecting an aura of annoyance in the whole room, "Blaster just needs to stop behaving like a child!"

"I NEED TO …" the Communications Officer jumped from his seat and stared as Bluestreak continued:

"FINALLY!" The Datsun 280Z threw his hands up in the air, before putting them on his hips, "He finally agrees! Finally we are having progress here!"

Smokescreen thought of himself as a professional; offlining his optics, he slowly began counting to ten.

"You …," the C.O. stood there with his mouth open and jaw slightly moving, trying to birth a sentence, "… you … are IMPOSSIBLE!"

"Oh, I am impossible?"

"YES!"

"I am not the one who wakes up our neighbors in the middle of the night …"

"You never stop talkin'!"

"Well maybe I would stop if you ever let me finish a sentence …"

"There! I let you finish a sentence!"

"… for once in your life!"

"Oh, you did that on purpose, didn't you?"

"No, you did that on purpose!"

"How … what the slag is wrong with you?"

"There is always something wrong with me, just me …"

"Oh, so you admit it?"

"You didn't let me finish the sentence in the first place! Oh, dear, how did …"

"Doesn't feel good when you are interrupted, huh?"

"Excuse me? When did I ever …"

"Just a few seconds ago!"

"Stop interrupting me!"

"Both of you! For the love of Cybertron! STOP!" The gambler finally couldn't let this go on. Nothing would get done if he did. "Good! Now, please, both of you, sit down; if you want some water or energon, they are right on this table. Please, try to calm down. We are going to talk out this entire mess and see what exactly is wrong. You two following me so far?"

"Yeah."

"Yes."

"Now, Bluestreak, tell me one thing that you like about Blaster and one thing that you do not like about him and Blaster, you are not allowed to say anything, got it?"

"Yeah."

"All right, Bluestreak, take it away."

"I don't like how Blaster keeps interrupting me."

"And now something you like about him?"

"He, um," the gunner shied away from answering for a few short moments, before he produced a grunt and continued, "I like the sound of his voice."

"All right, now, Blaster: your turn."

"I don't like it how Bluestreak says that he lets everybody have a turn at saying something even though he is the only one talking all the time."

"All right, and the other thing?"

"I, eh, he, um, loyal."

"All right. From what I saw so far, as, um, unbelievable as it will sound, both of you are lacking in communication. More importantly, listening to one another. Now, Bluestreak, you do know that you can, at times, talk non-stop for hours?"

"Well …"

"Come on, Bluestreak!"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Good! Now, Blaster, you, you do understand how discouraging and frightening it can be when you turn on your music at times?"

"I just want …"

"No, Blaster, relax. Just yes or no."

"Yes."

"Now, why do you think you do what you do? Talking a lot and not really listening to what other people say?"

"Well …"

"It could be that …"

"Guys, I am begging you! You two are very cute together and you probably weren't made for one another, but you can alter yourselves for each other. That is some of the greatest commitments in existence! Or look at it this way, you two obviously care for one another otherwise you wouldn't be here, am I wrong?"

"No."

"Nope."

"Guys, maybe it is time to stop fighting and time to start talking and listening - as annoying as it may get sometimes. However, I'm sure both of you will realize how much you love to hear the other talking about their day, sharing experiences, so on and so forth once you do. I can only help you two so much; the ones who can truly help you, are yourselves."

"Well, maybe I did get quite, um, erratic."

"I need to work on mine too."

"See? Wasn't that nice? No screaming, no nothing but you two talking in a calm voice and sharing some information. Now, here is what I would do if I were in your place: march straight out of this office, ask for a few days off, stock up on energon and begin talking about yourselves. Things like what made you into the mechs that you are today. Can I trust you with that?"

"Yeah."

"Yes."

"Good! Good! Here is something to get you two started: Blaster, do you want to be heard? Why? Blustreak, where is your family? What happened to them?"

Watching the two leave the room, hand in hand, Smokescreen leaned back in his chair, grinning smugly.

"Heh, Datsun 280Z is not as good as Datsun 280X. Why? Easy: "X" marks the spot and I am as good as the riches are gonna get."


Author's Notes:

One of the challenges in this series is going to be, obviously, the psychological components for me to write about, I mean despite me studying psychology in my nursing program it is still just one course however I do have a strong belief that I am doing a good job because most of these cases are taken from personal experience, some I have been part of, some I have been witness, in some I was in the splash zone.

I am hoping that people upon reading a few of these will be able to learn a thing or two about relationships, I don;t know abut you people, but I like it when a couple gets together and they work on the relationship, keeping it alive and blooming! Aren't we all looking for that special someone?

I hope you enjoyed the first chapter! More will come soon!

Thanks to C.M.D. for editing and reviewing!