Disclaimer: Clearly I'm not Stephenie Meyer. And if I was, Midnight Sun wouldn't have got put "on hold indefinitely".
"There's a girl
Who sits under the bleachers
Just another day eating alone
And though she smiles
There is something just hiding
And she cant find a way to relate"
I'm waiting. I'm always sitting here waiting. I sit under the rotting bleachers of a Native American Reservation high school: La Push. I've been on this rez since I was about four. Father moved us down here from our little two bedroom house on the Makah Reservation.
Both my parents are full Quiluete, but my father was adopted by a Makah couple when he was young. He spent most of his life on that rez, and he hated it. He hated everything that had to do with being Native. Mom on the other hand, used to love it all. The cultures, the people, everything. But that was before it all happened. She lost her passion for her people after that, it was such a long time ago. And I always wish every night, that she would come back, come back to the way she was once before. I wait and wait and wait. But nothing ever happens. Because even with all my wishing and waiting, no one hears me. For I am invisible.
Sometimes I keep forgetting my "super cool" power of invisibility. Not one person listens, sees or pays attention to me. Mom used to, but now she is just a shell of what who she once was. She doesn't talk, she never makes eye contact with you, nothing. She became an unresponsive wall flower. I keep waiting for her to snap out of the daze she has been in all these years, just waiting for her to notice what happens to me almost every night. But she doesn't, and at this point I don't think she will.
I lay in my bed every night waiting every for him to touch me, hurt me, make me feel worthless. I'm waiting for someone to save me, to help pick up the pieces of my shattered soul. I'm waiting for someone to notice me, hear my voice and my cries. I'm just waiting for someone to force him not to hurt me or my mother. I'm just waiting, like always.
Alas, I am invisible. So no one hears, no one sees, no one cares. I'm passing through life without any sense of where I'm going, or who I am. No sense of how to stop a monster from coming into my bed every night. Nothing, nada, zip.
Besides being invisible, I have become numb and unfeeling. I don't feel when he touches or hits me. I don't feel my tears cascading down my face every time his disgusting hands roam my petite body. I don't scream or cry anymore because that only eggs him on, making it all the better for him. I do nothing, just lay there and stare at my ceiling wait for him to be finished. I did fight, I fought for the longest time. I was no match for him though, I never will be. I'm waiting for the moment where I just snap, pack mom's and my things and get away from the hell we have endured since moving to La Push twelve years ago. It hasn't happened yet, and at the rate I'm going, I don't think it ever will.
I will still hold out, I will still believe in the impossible. I always have, everything that "isn't real" to some, I always believed to be true. My Prince Charming will come and rescue me and my mother from the horrors that we live now. He will protect us, help us. He and I will fall in love, soul mates forever.
Even though I do wholeheartedly believe that this will happen, I have my doubts. But the overwhelming sense of truth behind my thoughts and wishes, override these negative doubts. I hope he finds me soon, I hope he notices me.
There's only one person I want to fill my Prince's position: Jared Najala. I've been in love with him since sixth grade, now I'm in eleventh. He hasn't spared me a glance or a sentence. Apart from the occasional "Yo, you got a pencil?". Maybe one day he will just turn around, and feel the same. I can only hope, wish and wait.
Ring! Ring! Ring!
I sigh, my warm breath hit the crisp fall air. I stand, but my legs feel as if a thousand needles are in them. They must have fell asleep while I was fat dreaming. Unsteadily, I walk over the beams holding up the rotting bleachers above me. My lunch period has ended, now time to be brought back to the living. And not just my hopeful dreams and thoughts.
As I speed walk to make sure I'm not late, I can't help but wonder if things are going to get any better. If he will stop hurting me and mom, if I won't be invisible anymore. If someone will rescue me from this hell and if Jared is that someone. Ill just keep waiting, like I always do.
AN: Hello lovely readers of mine! (and those of you who aren't!) This is a bit darker than my other fics, but fear not! I shall stick to canon and make the world right once more! I was really inspired by the song Miss Invisible by MariƩ Digby. It's an amazing song, it spoke volumes to me when I was listening to it. It reminded me so much of how I perceive Kim, before Jared imprints. If you guys haven't heard it, go listen NOW! I will need incentive to write another chapter and to keep up with this story. I've got big plans for Kim but, I sadly must admit that I'm lazy and I forget to update! I know, I'm a horrible person, but I will make it all better loves, I promise! Jump on my Review Wagon and...REVIEW! Constructive criticism and everything else is amazing!
