A/N: Ok, I know some of you are probably wondering why I am writing a new anything, even a one shot like this before finishing some of the stuff I have been working on for years without updating. I am sorry guys, I just got a new computer and I am working on those pieces, but I couldn't not write this one. So here it is, my first Make It Or Break It Fic. I think Emily and Damon are so cute together, and I had to write this. It is set between the first and second seasons.
Title: I Rest My Head
"You can drop me at the Shack if you want. My house is out of your way, and I can get a ride with my mom," Emily told Kaylie with no enthusiasm. 'Stupid prerecorded radio shows,' she thought. 'If only Damon had been there, I could have told him how I feel, and we would not be separated by thousands of miles with him not knowing that I won because of him. That I need him more than I want to admit. That I will love him as long as he lets me. And that his dream is just as important as mine, and if he has to pursue it, I would be a hypocrite to want him to stay here with me. But that does nothing to change the fact that he is the first person I have ever let myself love. And nothing will ever change that. He deserves to know. I have to figure out a way to tell him.'
"Are you sure you want me to drop you here? I can take you home, I don't mind," Kaylie said once they had arrived back at the Pizza Shack.
"Yeah, it is totally cool. I have my stuff here still, and everyone is going to want to know how it went anyway. It is totally fine. See, I have even stopped crying," Emily smiled, but it didn't quite reach her eyes.
"Ok, I will go in with you for a minute. Check in with the parents, let them know I am going home," Kaylie replied, turning off the car and unbuckling her seatbelt.
Emily stopped in front of the door. Turning to Kaylie she asked, "Um is it too late to accept that ride? I mean we are here, so I might as well get my stuff, but I don't think I am up for staying long, and since you are leaving soon anyway, would you mind?" Emily asked.
"Of course, Em. Let's go get your stuff and we will go," Kaylie answered, pulling open the door and wrapping an arm around Emily as they entered the pizza place.
"Hey Em, how did it go, what did he say?" Lauren asked as soon as she saw Emily and Kaylie.
Emily just stood there, trying to figure out what to say, feeling the tears threaten to well up again. Seeing her friend was struggling, Kaylie stepped up and supplied, "Well, it turns out the show was prerecorded, and he wasn't there when we got there. We are just here to get her stuff."
The girls parted to let Emily by so she could get her stuff, and she finally noticed Leo standing in a corner of the room. Not realizing she was even moving until she had stopped, she suddenly found herself right in his face, feeling the urge to shout. So she did, words pouring out of her like a flood, with out forethought or restraint. "This is all your fault! If you had just given me the note when you got it, I could have gone to go see him, and things would be fine. I would not feel like there is this heavy weight on my heart, pressing on my chest, making it hard to breathe, completely blocking out one of the best days of my life. Why would you do that to me, it isn't fair, he is thousands of miles away, and I am stuck here, and he will never know how I feel, and it is all your fault," she spoke through her teeth. Letting her anger take over completely, she balled up her fists and started to pound his chest ineffectively. "Why did you do that, why? It isn't fair," she started to sob when he caught her hands, and crumpled into him when he pulled her close, her anger already spent.
"I am so sorry, Emily, you have no idea how sorry I am. Deep down, all I want is for you to be happy, and if this Damon kid is the one who makes you happy, who so effectively fuels your gymnastics, then I would never do anything to stand in the way of that. I am so sorry, you are right, I had no right to hide the note from you, and if I had known what it said, I never would have. There is nothing I want more than to be able to make it right for you, but I can't, I am more sorry for that than anything else," he told her while she cried in his arms, offering the best comfort he knew how.
"How about you let me make it up to her?" a voice Emily would know anywhere offered.
"Damon?" she looked up, not willing to believe her ears. When she saw it really was him, she got up and ran to him, wrapping her arms around him and kissing her for all she was worth. "You came back, why did you come back? You are supposed to be off living your dream," she spoke softly when she broke the kiss.
"Because I couldn't leave things like this between us. I love you, Emily, and I owe you a good bye in person, even if you don't want it, because I need it. I was sitting in the airport, finally having a moment to think about all of this, to really catch my breath, and I realized that I hadn't told the one person I wanted to share this moment with the most. And because I hadn't, it didn't mean as much to me. And I was willing to let it go, and still get on that plane, but I saw the recap of the invitational on the news and saw that you had won two medals, and I knew I had to come see you. I talked to my handler, and I can leave tomorrow. That is why it took me so long to get here. I had to make arrangements and beg a little bit, and in the end I had to throw a tantrum to get her to agree, but I knew I couldn't go off to live my dream with out giving you a proper good bye," he replied.
"I love you so much, and it didn't mean anything to me either," she said. "I will wait for you , Damon, if you will wait for me."
"I will wait as long as it takes." He pulled her closer than she thought possible and kissed her until she was sure she could hear music.
"'Can you catch me, If I let go?' That was the sultry song styling's of Boulders own Damon Young, singing his song Tightrope, the one that won him a gig opening for Green Day's European tour, and we wish him all the best. It is 6:30 on a Thursday morning, and we will be back with more WRBE music after these messages from our sponsors." Emily reached over and turned off her alarm.
'It was just a dream,' she groaned, rolling over. The worst part was that most of it wasn't a dream. Damon was in Europe. She had gone back to the Shack that night. She did take it all out of Leo. But the best part of the dream, that never happened. Damon never came back to tell her how he feels, she never told him how she feels, and he will never know that she was willing to wait to give them a shot.
She gets up and walks to the bathroom. On the way, she passes her trashcan, full of crumpled up pieces of paper. Another reminder of all of the things they left unsaid, all of her attempted and failed letters. He has been gone for almost a month now, and she still can't reach him. She knows she can't send an e-mail, he deserves more than that. And every time she tries to call, she get a friendly electronic voice telling her that the party she is trying to reach is out side of their service area, and that she should try back later.
All of this is in the front of her mind as she hops in the shower. She gets halfway through before realizing she was smiling when she woke up. That is when she looses it, and crumples to the floor in the tub, overcome by and sobbing out all her grief.
A/N: Let me know what you think. Luv, Ace.
