Dearest Jester Fatal (Otherwise known as my Natasha),
Hey! What's up? Err, sorry. That looks almost identical to your letter. Oh well. Anyway, 'round mid-July is when you'll be coming if it's all right. Probably around the 15th. Anyway, the thing with Lily's house is fine with the Potters. Give me word if it happens and when it'll be. That's mean- inviting James! Goodness, Lily's going to kill him! And you for thinking it up, come to think of it. Oh well. I'll save you from her.
Anyway, I miss you bunches. James is making fun of me for bringing you up so often. I told him to shut up and go back to his Lily Shrine. He simply blushed and left. He's got pictures of Lily on his wall. Funny, huh? He really wants to go out with her. I'm not sure if he likes her or the fact she's the only girl who won't go out with him. Heh. So, what are you up to? Ever think about me? =) I hope so, 'cause I'd feel rather stupid for thinking about you so much then. Nah, never mind. Even if you never thought about me I'd be happy thinking about you. Well, I gotta go.
Much love,
King Padfoot
Sirius Black
P.S: You love me? Teehee, we haven't even been dating to long.
P.P.S: James says hello and he thinks it's funny you love me.
-
My Dearest Sirius,
Parents said July was fine. I can't wait until I see you. Allie and Katrina are going to be in America until July 14th and Lily and I won't be able to see each other until later in the summer. I'm all alone! Just my parents, and they're no fun. I would do anything to get out of here. Hell, I'd probably be happier at the Malfoy's Mansion! No kidding!
Aww, I'm glad you think about me. I think about you too. Probably more often then you think of me, because it's the only thing I can actually do around here. Oh well. Anyway, tell James I said hello and to stop making fun of you or I'll tell Lily about his teddy bear. Yeah, I found out about that. Ask James if you'd like to know how I found out. Oi. I'm running out of things to say so I'll end this letter for now.
Hugs and Kisses (No love),
Jester Fatal
Natasha Evans
P.S: You laughed at the word love so I don't love you anymore.
P.P.S: Tell James to go to hell if he thinks my letter ending was funny again.
-
Dear Tasha,
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING INVITING POTTER TO MY HOUSE? My parents said yes and already sent invitation to the guys and girls. I so hate you at the moment. Come on, Remus was all right, and maybe Sirius, but POTTER? What were you thinking? I thought you were sensible! Did you want me to commit murder? Not only will I have to spend part of my summer with him, but also he's going to LEARN WHERE I LIVE! I'm going to have to change my name and move a couple countries away now.
Anyway, Allie and Katrina are coming July 20th and spending the rest of the summer with me, so when are you coming? I know you're going to Sirius's for a week, so how about after that? Contact me when you know. Josh is coming over so I have to go now.
See ya,
Queen Lily
Or
(Just) Lily
P.S: Have you even heard from your lover boy?
-
Dear Lily,
Aww, c'mon Lily. You don't need to do all that just because James is coming over. What does it matter if he knows where you live? You plan on moving sometime after we graduate, anyway, don't you? I do. -.- You know how my parents are about me. Oh well. I guess I'll survive. How's Petty? I believe last time I talked to you you said she was engaged. Do you know when the wedding will be yet?
I'll probably go to Sirius's around the 15th, so I believe I'll probably be over around the 22nd or 23rd. I can't wait until I get out of this house. It's so – so – normal! It's so normal to muggle standards that it's not even normal for muggles! It makes me want to tear my hair out. Oh, by the way, I have surprise when I come over. You're so going to think I've lost it. I like it though. But then again, you always told me I was weird. Oh well. I suppose it doesn't matter because what's done is done. Oi. I heard that James had pictures of you on his wall. I think someone's a bit smitten with you.
And you like him. Don't even try denying it. You just refuse to believe it because he sometimes tends to act rather conceited. Well, I'm going. See ya.
Jester Fatal
(Otherwise known as)
Tasha Evans
P.S: I have heard from my 'lover boy' as you so put it.
P.P.S: Don't call Sirius my lover boy. It disturbs me.
-
My Darling Natasha (Otherwise known as Jester Fatal),
Guess I'll be seeing you in July. Poor you; a whole week with my damned family. Wait a minute! Poor me! I have to spend two weeks with them! AH! Sorry, just scared myself at the thought. You have to be really bored to say that you'd be happier at the Malfoy's. I mean he has it in for you, not to mention your muggleborn. It'd be a "dodge the purebloods" game. And I'm shocked; you used the word hell! Bravo, perhaps this means you're as innocent as we all thought you were.
I still miss you. I'm counting the days until I see you again. Oh yeah, you'll be coming the 15th. James and I will pick you up (believe it or not, James got a muggle drivers license, as well as a car!) and we'll go to the Potter's until my parents pick us up. We'll be at your house around 7:30 a.m. so be ready. Well, actually, first I need directions. I believe you know where the Potter's live, from what I've heard from James. Do I want to know how you know where it is?
I'm impatiently waiting your response. I mean, really impatiently. I haven't even sent the letter yet! Oh. Sorry. Going to go now. Miss you heaps.
Much Love,
Sirius
P.S: Aww, c'mon. You don't love me anymore? I'm sorry for laughing; I just thought it was sweet! Forgive me, please?
P.P.S: James thought your ending was funny. I told him to go to hell like you said to.
P.P.P.S: James says he thinks your crazy for the idea of inviting us all to Lily's house, but we're all going, anyway.
P.P.P.P.S: Sorry, I just wanted to add another one P to the P.S.'s. I miss you.
-
My Beloved Sirius,
Don't worry; I'm sure you'll survive the two weeks and I the one. I like your game title. "Dodge the purebloods". Sounds like much fun. Anyway, I never said I was innocent. I just tend to behave during school. Ah, poor naïve Sirius, knowing next to nothing about his girlfriend. Don't worry; you'll see another side to me when it comes down to being at Lily's. Be warned; I can be really hyper. I know it's hard to believe.
You're counting the days, eh? That's cute. Ha! The great Sirius Black is doing something cute. Who'd a thought it? Anyway, seven thirty in the morning? You're crazy! In the summertime I sleep in until at least noon! Do you know how hard it'll be for me to wake up? Oh well. I suppose I'll survive. The directions are on the other paper. I'm still missing you, too. I'm going now. Buh-bye, I'll now send you your letter Impatient One.
Love and Kisses,
Natasha
P.S.: Since you apologized, I suppose I love you again.
P.P.S: If James laughs at the ending, tell him I'm coming over there and kicking his ass.
P.P.P.S: Yeah, I know I'm crazy, James. I'm glad you're all coming, though. J
P.P.P.P.S: Next time, not so many P.S.'s please. I miss you, too.
-
Dear Tasha,
Hello! Allie writing. What's up? It's pretty cool here; we've been to different beaches and stuff. I picked up a couple cool seashells. How are you? Heard from Sirius yet? I'm sure you have, the boy's lovesick over you, and now that you're back together, he probably writes you like everyday. He's almost as bad as Katrina is with Remus. Oi. Katrina just hit me for saying that. I'm sorry I didn't get to come over or you come over to my or Katrina's house. We were suddenly hit with the news of us going to America, so we didn't really have time to contact your or Lily. Oh well. Anyway, Katrina wants to write so I'll be leaving now. Adios!
Hey, Tasha, what's up? And FYI, I'm not that obsessed with Remus. I just want to make sure he's okay. You are crazy, by the way. Inviting the boys to Lily's house? Inviting POTTER? You've so lost it. I'm sure murder will take place this summer, and if not then, considering how long she'll have been with James, she'll kill him after we get to Hogwarts. Interesting; Murder at Hogwarts. What a newspaper title. It'll be like: "The young Potter boy was found dead from the hands of Lily Evans, a fellow 7th year last night in the Gryffindor Common Room." I can see it now. Oi- I have to be going. It's dinnertime. Well, we'll write again soon.
Duchess Allie-Cat (Otherwise known as Allie)
&
First Lady Giggles (Otherwise known as Katrina)
-
Dear Allie and Katrina,
Hey! What's up? Nothin' here. I'm so bored. I have to have the most boring family in the world and I'm not going to Sirius's until the 15th. That's still 18 days away. Sirius and me will probably be at Lily's around the 22nd or 23rd. Anyway, I have a surprise when you guys see me again. You'll think I've lost it; though I do believe I've never had it. Oh well. I'm crazy and that's all that matters. Yes, I have heard from Sirius, and he writes me every other day, sometimes every day. It depends when I respond to his letters. I like your newspaper article, Katrina, by the way. Oh, I have to go. The parents are yelling.
Hope Your Well,
Jester Fatal (Otherwise known as Tasha)
-
My dearly loved Natasha,
I'm glad you like my game title. I play it all the time at home. Anyway, are you saying that you're not innocent? I'm having a heart attack at the thought. Oh well, I'm sure your still my Natasha the same. Yes, my Natasha and nobody else's. I'm selfish and keeping you to myself. My girl. Okay, so I guess I'll be nice and let you see our friends. But not to often.
It's not cute. I'm just missing you, that's all. Don't laugh at me. It's mean. And yes, 8 in the morning. I know it's early, but knowing my parents, they'll be here around 8:30. Thanks for the directions, by the way. I can't wait until I see you. I know. I'm persistent. Anyway, as soon as I see you I'm going to tie you up and hide you away where only I can see you. . Yay! I'm going to steal you and force you to marry and me and everything. Oh, gotta go. James and Remus are saying its dinnertime (Remus is over. Yay!).
Much love,
Sirius
P.S: Yay! You love me again! Oh, and you're going to have to come kick James's ass. He laughed when he read the word love.
P.P.S: I congratulate you on the use of the word ass, along with the "Kick James's" that goes along with it.
P.P.P.S: James doesn't believe you could beat him up. He thinks you're weak. Still missing you.
-
My Dearest Sirius (who is more the just a little possessive),
Don't dream small, do you? You know, instead of forcing me to marry you, you could try asking first. You never know. Do I want to know what the "and everything" that goes along with it is? And do you really feel the need to tie me up? Perhaps I would come willingly. You really must think these things out. And where would you take me? Have you thought about that? Where are you going to hide an almost seventeen-year-old girl where no one else can find her?
And what about our friends? If you let them see me sometimes, what if I gave away where you were hiding me? Where else would you find to hide me? And what if our friends stole me back and hid me from you? What would you do then? Do you know of a way to find me again? Would you steal me back? And what if I refused to go back? What would you do then? Would you try and tie me up again? And what about my wand? What if I were to use magic? These Things Must Be Thought Out Completely and Properly!
Sorry, got carried away. I have nothing better to do then think of all those questions. Pathetic, isn't it? Oi. This was a waste of a letter. Oh well. I'm going to go now and let you contemplate about these oh-so-important questions. I still miss you!
Love and Kisses,
Your Natasha
P.S: Tell James he's gonna regret calling me weak.
P.P.S: Thank you.
P.P.S: See first P.S. Missing you as well.
-
(A/N: For this letter James writes in ((these)) and Remus in [these] and Sirius is normal.)
July 7th
Natasha my love, ((lovesick fool!)) Damn it, James! Give me my letter back!
Sorry, James was stealing the parchment. I'd get a new piece, but James hid them from me saying I need to stop writing you so often. I managed to salvage this piece. I guess I'll have to ask Mrs. P for some more. Anyway, Natasha, honey, I think you have too much time on your hands to think of all those questions. But I'll try an answer them. [Sirius, do you realize just how many questions you'd have to answer?] Remus! This is my letter! Go away! ((Hi Tasha!)) James! Okay, let us try again. Onto the Questions:
Don't dream small, do you?
You're right. I dream huge. [He's lying. He doesn't have the capacity to dream big] Damn it, Remus! Go away!
Do I want to know what the "and everything" that goes along with it is?
Probably not. ((Yeah, 'cause Sirius has a naughty mind)) James! I'm going to kick your ass twice if you keep writing!
And do you really feel the need to tie me up?
Well, I'm not sure. It depends how I'm feeling when I kidnap you. ((That means-)) James, keep it up and you die.
And where would you take me?
Okay, so I haven't completely thought that one out. I was thinking a nice island somewhere. [Ha! We can now begin tracking you! We know you're going to be on an island.] Uh-uh. I said I was thinking about it. I never said I would.
Have you thought about that?
See above. (('Cause Sirius is too lazy to write it again.))
Where are you going to hide an almost seventeen-year-old girl where no one else can find her?
See above. And your not 17 yet? When is your birthday? I just realized I didn't know. [What a good boyfriend you are, Sirius.] Go to hell, Remus.
And what about our friends?
Who cares about friends? They're only annoying me, anyway. ((Gee, thanks Sirius.)) [Yeah. We're so glad to know you care.]
If you let them see me sometimes, what if I gave away where you were hiding me?
I'd use a memory charm. Or move you to a better island.
Where else would you find to hide me?
See above. ((Lazy bum.))
And what if our friends stole me back and hid me from you?
I'd beat the crap out of them. [Gee, thanks.] ((Whoot! Go us! We're stealing humans!))
What would you do then?
Again, see above. I suppose I'd have to find you again, as well. ((Well, yeah, considering you forced her to marry you.)) What does that have to do with anything? [Oi…]
Do you know of a way to find me again?
No. But I'll try my hardest. Or I could just beat them until they tell me where you are. ((Violent…)) Yep. [And you like him why, Tasha?]
Would you steal me back?
Well, duh. That's what I've been saying.
And what if I refused to go back?
Why would you do that? [To get away from you.] Shut up. ((Aww, we hurt his feelings.))
What would you do then?
Cry and force you to come back anyway. ((Aww, Sirius would cry.)) Shut up. [Touchy, touchy.]
Would you try and tie me up again?
It depends on how I'm feeling. [Yeah, that means-] Quit writing, Remus. Stop while you're ahead. [I'm ahead?] No. [Then why say that?] I didn't. I wrote it.
And what about my wand?
What about it? James, stop giggling. You're 17 years old. ((But-)) [No, James.]
What if I were to use magic?
… I'd cry. No, not really. I wouldn't let you. I'd have to tie you up- ((And then-)) James, don't even think about writing it. Anyway, I'd have to tie you up and take your wand.
There. I think that's it. [No it's not.] Oh? [Yeah. Here's the other one:]
Pathetic, isn't it?
Oi. No, it's not. It gives me something to write about. (('Cause he's too stupid to think of something to write about on his own.)) James. ((Yes?)) Shut up. ((I'm not talking.)) [Breathe, Sirius, breathe.]
Okay, that's it. Now we're going to play twenty questions. ((Great…)) Shut up, James. [Yeah, he wants to know more about his lover girl.] Shut up. Anyway, here are my questions:
1. When's your birthday?
2. Are you planning on getting married?If I wasn't forcing you, that is. ((You know, forcing a girl to marry you really isn't a way to win her over...))
3. What's your favorite song?
4. What are you going to be when you graduate?
5. Where are you going to live when you graduate? [Stalking her, Sirius?] Yes. ((Oi.))
6. How many are in your immediate family?
7. Are you going to want kids? ((Aw, a bunch of little Sirius and Natasha's running around. How many do you think, Remus?)) [Ah, I say they have about sixteen...]
8. . Do you love me? ((Bleh. Sirius, we made it clear she does.)) [:) Katrina loves me.] ((Yeah, and you love her.))
9. Will you got the graduation dance with me? ((Sirius, that's like, ages away!)) So? [He loves her! Teehee.] I don't know. ((What do you mean you don't know?)) I think I do, but think about it. I'm me. None of my relationships last very long. =( Natasha, I'm confused. ((And that's a change... how?))
10. What's your favorite season? ((Aw, look! Sirius actually managed count to ten!)) [That's a dumb question] Both of you shut up. It's my letter and I'll ask what I want to ask!
11. What do you want to do next Valentines Day? ((Remember the Great Valentines Day Fiasco of Sixth Year?)) Yes, James. I do. If you remember, it was my damn fiasco with my Natasha. [Aw, poor Sirius. But it all worked out in the end.] ((By the way Sirius, Valentines is like seventh months away.)) So?
12. When do you think Lily and James will start going out? ((I am not going to go out with her.)) But you like her. ((That's beside the point.)) [You know, I was pretty amazed when he gave up after fifth year.] I know what you mean.
13. How did you meet Lily, Allie, and Katrina? ((How did they meet?)) [Who knows.] They do.
14. I ran out of questions. Can you think of one for me? ((Oi. Sirius, you're suppose to think of questions to ask her.)) Oh well.[Oi, Sirius, I worry about you.]
Okay, So we only played 14 questions, and only thirteen of them technically counted. ((Yeah, 'cause he's to stupid to think of any more.)) Shut up, James. [He isn't speaking.] Go away. This is still MY letter. Nyah. Anyway, I'm going to go. I'm going to send this letter before it gets to much graffiti on it. I miss you and hope that you respond soon. Very soon. In fact, I'm already waiting for your response.
Much love,
Sirius
((P.S: Hey, Tasha! What's up?))
[P.P.S: Can't wait to see you at Lily's]
P.P.P.S: They're idiots. I still miss you a lot and can't wait to see you again.
-
July 13th
My dearest Sirius (And apparently James and Remus),
Hola! I'm so sorry I didn't respond sooner. My parents were being pests and I had to go to a few dinner parties and stuff. Bleh. It was sooo boring. I'm glad I'll be seeing you soon. I miss you so much. Anyway, I can't believe you answered all of my questions. This amuses me. And I had a pretty big amusement reading James and Remus's comments. They're so mean to you. And James, what do you think your doing hiding the parchment so he can't write me? I'm going to hex you into the next millennium if you try it again. Anyway, I suppose I'll answer your questions now.
1. When's your birthday?
2. Are you planning on getting married? If I wasn't forcing you, that is.
I don't know. If you weren't forcing me, perhaps I'd be a little more willing to answer that question more specifically.
3. What's your favorite song?
I really don't know. I love tons of songs. Sorry.
4. What are you going to be when you graduate?
I was thinking and Auror or Healer, or something like that.
5. Where are you going to live when you graduate?
Away from my damn parents, that's where. Actually, I don't know. I'm going to start looking for an apartment when it nears the end of the year. And I feel so loved that you would stalk me. You know, it's better not to stalk your girlfriend.
6. How many are in your immediate family?
Me and my oh-so-loving mother and father.
7. Are you going to want kids?
Maybe, maybe not. And Remus, SIXTEEN FRIGGIN' KIDS? ARE YOU CRAZY?
8. . Do you love me?
Hmm… If you want me to. Nah, I'm kidding. I can't answer that question quite yet.
9. Will you got the graduation dance with me?
Duh. Of course I will. See, you can't answer question number 8 either.
10. What's your favorite season?
Fave season, huh? Probably summer or fall.
11. What do you want to do next Valentines Day?
Don't know. Ask me again when it comes around. And James, we do not need a reminder of the Great Valentines Day Fiasco of Sixth Year.
12. When do you think Lily and James will start going out?
Oh, I say around the end of summer or beginning of school. Them spending time together will surely help them. I hope.
13. How did you meet Lily, Allie, and Katrina?
I met Lily 'cause she's my cousin. I met Allie at the train station first year when Malfoy cornered her and tried to kiss her and we both hexed him pretty badly. I met Katrina before we got into the boats. She ticked me off and I told her she reminded me of a giraffe in a blonde wig. Then I shoved her into the lake. We've been best friends ever since.
14. I ran out of questions. Can you think of one for me?
Not at the moment, sorry. Maybe when we see each other I'll think of one for you.
Anyway, I'm really sorry I didn't write sooner. It drove me nuts that I couldn't answer your letter. I was to busy in the day and to tired at night. Forgive me? Please? I'll give you a kiss. Oh wait. I'd give you a kiss even if you didn't forgive me. Oh well. I tried. I've got to go. Sorry this letter isn't all that long.
Love and Kisses,
Your Natasha
P.S: Hey, James. Nothing's up. Unless you count the ceiling and sky and stars and gas prices, and such stuff.
P.P.S: Thanks Remus, I'll be glad to see you there as well.
P.P.P.S: I miss you to. I'm longing to see you again.
-
Beloved Natasha,
Miss you. Be there tomorrow. You took to long on the last letter. I don't think I can forgive you. Ever. Must cut this short, James is trying to throw my broom out the window. Must bash his head in.
Much Love,
Sirius
P.S: Make sure you pack ROBES. My parents will freak if you wear muggle clothing.
