I know I said I wouldn't be back for a while, but I just couldn't stay away. I decided to go with a missing scenes fic. I hope you guys enjoy it.
Disclaimer: I own nada! If I did, these scenes would have been in the show!
A/N: These chapters are much shorter than my normal sagas. I promise I will finish this, but I'm just not sure how long it will take me to get through every episode of seasons three and four.
The Aftermath – Original Airdate – September 8th, 2005.
Kristen had this thing about speaking to Sandy ever night before she went to bed. It was a pact they settled on in the very early stages of their relationship. No matter where they were or how drunk they became, they would always make sure to say goodnight to each other. It was something Kirsten picked up from her mother.
"Don't ever go to bed angry." Rose said. "It essential that you work things out before the day is over, otherwise your problems will carry with you to the next morning. They will never dissolve into thin air."
Kirsten followed her mother's advice and although Sandy didn't necessarily agree with this, he knew it was one of Kirsten's quirks and accepted it. It was a routine they easily fell into, although not all their goodnights were expressed with just words.
It was the end of the summer and Sandy missed his wife terribly. It had been way too long since they said their goodnights side by side, while wrapped in their expensive pratesi sheets. Three and a half months had passed, but they still made sure they spoke every night.
Her time at Suriak had to be coming to an end. He spoke to Dr. Woodruff himself and he said Kirsten was more than ready to come home. He was still trying to figure out why she lied to him today. He went to visit her and she seemed unsure, almost timid about coming home.
As usual Seth's timing was impeccable. He was going to tell her he knew Dr. Woodruff gave her the green light, but Seth called to tell him that Trey woke up. Unfortunately this case involving Seth and Ryan trumped his wife's aversions.
Kirsten knew something was off about the way Sandy acted this afternoon. Actually he has not been himself since she was in rehab. She couldn't blame him though. Because of her drinking, she turned his life upside down.
She didn't know the half of it. She didn't know about what happened after he dropped her off at Suriak. The phone call he received from Seth that nearly caused him a heart attack. She didn't know that Ryan was almost killed, the boys were being interrogated and that they all were experiencing sleepless nights.
It was getting late and she wanted to say goodnight to Sandy before she fell asleep. She made her way out into the hallway and dialed her familiar number.
Sandy was getting changed from taking Ryan home from prison. The sight of Ryan in a jumpsuit was very unnerving for Sandy. He thought he rescued him from that life. Yet, there he was, sitting on the opposite side of the table wearing midnight blue with seven snaps.
He just wished life were simpler. He didn't want to think about Trey. He was hopefully out of their lives for the time being. He certainly didn't want to think about Jimmy and what a pussy he proved to be. He didn't want to think about Julie and all of her manipulation. He didn't even want to think about The Newport Group, ironically the one thing that kept his mind off of all the horrors of the summer.
He just wanted to think about Kirsten. He started to reach for the phone to call her when the cordless receiver rang in his hands.
"I was just going to call you." He answered knowing it was her.
"Great minds." She replied. "I just wanted to thank you for visiting today."
"For the thousandth time, you don't have to thank me. I wish I could come more than I do."
"I miss you." She said quietly. She hated the lack of privacy the hallway phone held. "You just left and I miss you terribly."
Sandy thought about what to say next. Should he bring up the fact that she could be home with him soon? Today was the first time he admitted it out loud and to Jimmy of all people. Kirsten didn't want to come home.
Kirsten could tell Sandy was deep in thought. He was rarely this quiet and she decided to mention it. "Sandy, I know I've asked you this a million times since I came to Suriak, but are you okay?"
He decided to let things lie for now. "I just miss you too." He replied back.
"Are we going to be okay?" She was suddenly worried once again for what she had put him through.
"You never have to worry about us. I'm not going anywhere. You believe me right?" Sandy felt like she needed constant reassurance.
"Yes, but I can't help thinking there is more going on than what you are telling me."
Shit, Sandy thought. He didn't want to do anything to negate the progress Kirsten has made. "What do you mean?"
"It's just..." She thought about how to express something so intangible. "You come here and make jokes about peanut butter cookies, but I can tell something is bothering you. As soon as Seth called, you entire disposition changed."
Sandy was quiet, thanking God he was on the phone and she couldn't see him in person.
When Sandy stayed quiet, Kirsten knew she was right. "I don't mean just today. You have been distant with me the entire summer and I can't help but think that you cannot get over what happened between us."
Sandy wanted to ease her worries. "It has nothing to do with us. Do you trust me?"
"What?"
"Just answer the question. Do you trust me?"
"Of course I trust you, probably more than anyone on this Earth."
"Then I need you to trust that you and I are fine."
"Okay, but I know that there is something going on. I am trying to understand why you would keep it from me, but if you want me to trust you then I will. I understand that whatever it is, you feel that I am better off not knowing."
Sandy decided to give in, just a bit. "There's been some drama with the boys. They are physically fine and they miss you very much. They cannot wait for you to come home. I cannot wait for you to come home."
"Are you sure they are okay?" Kirsten was immediately worried. Her worry for her relationship with Sandy was quickly replaced with her worry for her children.
"Yes. Everything is fine." Sandy wouldn't have been able to say that yesterday, but now with Trey making his statement that Marissa actually pulled the trigger, it was the truth. He thought about opening a Pandora's box. "Tell me what's going on with you?"
Kirsten knew Sandy was done talking about the boys and she obliged for his sake. "After you left today I had a session with my counselor. I thought it went pretty well."
"Did you talk about why you don't want to come home?" Sandy said coldly. He didn't mean for the words to come out so quickly. He didn't mean to sound so accusing.
"Why would you say that?" She whispered, not wanting anyone to hear her.
Sandy started to climb into bed, nestling his head against the pillows. "Just like you can tell there is something going on with me, I can definitely tell there is something going on with you."
She should have known he could see the fear in her eyes. "Sandy, there is nothing I want more than to come home to you and the boys. That doesn't mean I'm not petrified of that becoming a reality."
"What are you so afraid of?"
"That I'm not going to be the woman I used to be. That I am not going to be who you all expect me to be."
"We love whoever you are, because ultimately you are my wife and Seth and Ryan's mother. That is the only thing that matters to us."
"Okay." She said accepting his response.
"Okay?" He needed to hear to it again. He needed to make sure everything would be perfect once she came home.
"Okay." She said more firmly. "I'm going to go to bed. Are you turning in soon?"
"Soon? I'm already under the covers."
"Oh, I miss that image." She said seductively.
"You? I'm dying in this big bed without you."
She laughed at his exaggeration. "Goodnight Sandy. I love you."
"I love you too."
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