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The Weight of Betrayal
Betrayal. It was a word Hisagi knew. He had come across it many times in conversation – conversations about other people; those poor people.
But now he knew what it felt like - betrayal. It was heavy. Pressing down on him at unsuspecting moments, unrelated events, and in moments of still quiet. The weight crept into his daily life – the life that was no longer his, he didn't recognise it. His life, his world, his normal… was gone. Sometimes he found himself looking for something about the office, but he wasn't looking for some thing. He was looking for his lost life, his lost security, his lost world. The world lost to betrayal.
The silence of the office was distracting, it was conducive for thinking and he didn't want to think – he wanted to be busy. Working and thinking - it wore him out and yet, he still dreamt at night and woke with a crushing sadness. It lingered after him like a shadow – it was his shadow. Everywhere he went.
And yet… it started to fade. He didn't notice at first – the betrayal seemed so consuming, all he thought about. But other thoughts slowly seeped in. At first he would be shocked to realise he hadn't been thinking about it. And then hours would go by, then days and weeks.
Tōsen betrayal no longer smothered him.
But it would always be a part of him.
