AN: Just another random thing that came to me at the most inopportune moment, right when I shouldn't be up and writing, but alas are we not all slaves to our own muse. To give my personal opinion, I think Kushina has to be alive. If you look through that manga, they rarely develop a character in great detail or leave something a mystery for a long period, unless something big is eventually gonna center around them. Look at Danzo, left him in the shadows half the manga, key character now. Itachi, kept over and over talking about what he did, epic death battle and turns out it was all a giant lie. I can't believe they would finally say his parents, give Minato his big moment, and then leave Kushina as nothing. So this is my take on Kushina, hope you like it.
By Moonlight
She could never see him in the day, only by the moonlight. She could never watch him triumph and grow, only see him sleep. She could never celebrate his birthday with him; only sing a soft song while he slept.
It tortured the mother that she was locked away from her son by her own fear. What Minato must think of her, to have run from the son he had so much faith in? Now though, every time she saw him, she saw but one thing and it wasn't that of a teenage boy, but the demonic ones of the Kyuubi. Ever since that night when Sarutobi had brought her son back to her and informed her that Minato had given his life to seal the beast away forever, she had been unable to be around him. She had taken her newborn son in her arms, her body still weak from childbirth and there is had been. One eye was her son, and the other was that of the nine tailed demon fox. Sarutobi explained that the infant's body was adjusting to the sealing and that it would fade as the seal set completely over the next few hours but the sight of her beloved Naruto with a demon's eye haunted her from then on. She had all but thrown the boy back into the nurse's hands, who held him out like a dirty animal, but Kushina couldn't bring herself to care. All she saw was that her husband gave his life to seal the beast, and now it lived in the body of her son. Her baby's soul would be consumed by the Tailed Beast.
At first she had tried to be a mother to the boy, but every time she got close she saw the demon and every time he would scream his eyes burned a murderous red. The sight had been unbearable and so she had told Sarutobi she needed to go and that she would be back some day and asked the wise old Hokage to see that Naruto was looked after. It was so much easier to love her son when she didn't have to see him, see those eyes, his fangs, the whiskers, and the seal that had taken her beloved Minato from her.
She had only planned to be gone a few weeks, a month or two at the most. She just needed time to deal with her grief. But the weeks turned into months and the months turned into years and Kushina couldn't bring herself to return to Konohagakure. Her self-imposed exile was so easy to fulfill. She took random jobs as a rogue ninja, anything to give her an excuse to delay her return to the village, where she would have to be a mother again, where she would have to face the son she had scorned and yes…abandoned. He would be almost 3 now after all, she was sure he was happy. Sarutobi would look after him, and Minato had said their son would be a hero. Going back would mean seeing now that he was getting older where it was the fox who was dominant and confirm her nightmares, or her son and riddle her with guilt for her choice to abandon him in scorn. It hadn't even entirely been out of fear. She had wanted to be the Hokage's wife, she wanted to have her son. She didn't want to be the mother of the, what had Sarutobi called him…a Jinchuuriki. She had hated her son because he represented everything that had gone wrong in her perfect world in just one night.
After years in exile though, she had finally returned one night, her face covered by an Anbu mask, a fox mask to make the irony even sweeter. The village was rebuilt and thriving it seemed under Sarutobi's rule. Still, no matter where she went, she heard no mention of her son by name, only of the 'demon filth' which only served to further her fears. It was obvious now, her now 7 year old son was truly possessed by the fox. Walking as she though, she hadn't even realized she subconsciously found the apartment complex she had lived in when she had come as a refugee from the old Whirlpool country. Walking up to her old door, she also found one other strange thing, on the door was the name of her family and the name of her son. Why was her son living in such a place, he was only 7, he shouldn't be living in an apartment complex. Unable to hold her curiousity in, she performed a weak wind release technique to blow wind between the door and the the crack where the door locked into place, blowing the door open slowly.
To call the place a pigsty would have been an insult to pigs everywhere. Dirty clothes and instant ramen noodle littered the floors and some small ninja training tools for academy student sat on a stool, a blunted kunai on the floor. Tutting softly, the redhead moved through the main room, lightly moving some things but not too much. She couldn't leave evidence of her presence after all.
When she moved to the door to the bedroom though, she froze. There was loud snoring that gave away the presence of Naruto. It was something Minato had passed onto his son apparently. For all the ability he had with silently killing enemies with his Hiriashin, she never understood how he made enough noise snoring in bed to be heard over the sounds of a jackhammer.
This was the moment of truth. Her chance to see her son after six long years of living in the wild.
The tension was ruined however as a breeze blew the door further open to show a boy in the bed. Baby fat still littered his cheeks, but he looked so peaceful and it was that image of peace that Kushina would take with her that night. For at night when he was sleeping, she saw no fox, only her son. Only the boy she was proud to call hers and she had so much faith in. It was that image of a sleeping child that she took with her when she left the village again that night. After seeing him, she wasn't ready, she couldn't go back to him now, not when she had left him alone for years.
It was several more years before she made her way back to the Leaf Village. Through the years, stories had reached her ears of a young boy who was performing feats of greatness. A boy who had stood against Zabuza, the Demon of the Bloody Mist, who had defeated the son of the Kazekage and who had been seen at the site of a battle between the three legendary Sannin. A villager of the town even said this boy had been seen wielding the jutsu of the fourth Hokage, the legendary Rasengan. Naturally such stories were unbelievable, but she checked each one personally and each one was truth. Her son was growing up to truly be his father's son, and he had done it alone to make it even more impressive. She had even made a personal trip to wave and seen a plaque attached to the 'Great Naruto Bridge' to which she admittedly had felt faint upon reading it:
"The Great Naruto Bridge
"Dedicated in the Name of a Boy,
"Who Came to This Land a Stranger
"Who Fought Against Those Stronger Than Himself For People He Did Not Know,
"And Who Sparked the Heart of the People of Wave,
"And Became A Hero,
"In the Hopes that, Like His Will, This Bridge Will Never Crumble."
When she heard word of the last Uchiha defecting however, she knew she needed to return once more and maybe even stay this time. From the sounds of things, the new Hokage needed every ninja she could get.
Despite this thought though, she still found herself sneaking in by moonlight and soon found her son's hospital room. It had been well known every member of the team sent to retrieve the defective Uchiha had suffered injuries to some degree even among civilian towns so the hospital seemed a good place to begin her search. Even then, with his body wrapped in bandages from head to toe, she once again let out a smile at how peaceful he looked while sleeping.
Once again, she was gone by morning after spending the night at her son's bedside simply drinking in the sight of the boy with sun-kissed hair.
Kushina returned often enough over the years, the news of her son becoming more and more common and she made a point to make the trip whenever she heard he had been injured. Still though, she had tried to go during the day, she had planned it, she would tell him the truth and spend the last of her days making up for her abandonment of Naruto. When she got within sight though, the same image of a demon's eyes overwhelmed her and she felt the need to vomit. What was worse was she saw looks of understanding from villagers who saw the sick look on her face upon seeing Naruto. Not only had she abandoned him, the villagers hadn't even honored Minato's wish, she had left him all alone.
For now, she would be the watchful protector, the unknown guardian. For on every mission, a mysterious woman was there with them, jutsu shielding her presence. She was never even seen or heard. However, on a rare occasion when he slept, an Anbu mask was removed and the warm eyes of Kushina watched her son sleep. For this was her curse, to be so close to her son yet so far, to only be able to see her legacy by moonlight.
