Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who
1992
Rose would only be around six years old. Rose. Amazing, wonderful, brilliant Rose.
The Doctor desperately wanted to see her again. Why shouldn't he see her again? There was nothing stopping him. It wasn't like with Amy and Rory because they had created a fixed point in time. He quickly cut off that thought, the wound was still too fresh. He diverted his thoughts back to Rose. He was in London, during her timeline. Why shouldn't he go and see her?
Decision made, he started walking around London, thinking. She was just a little girl, she could be anywhere! But she would be with Jackie, that much was certain. All he had to do was follow the sound of loud complaining, and that should lead him straight to them.
The Doctor had only walked a few blocks when he came to a large park. Beside it was a red telephone box, not even nearly as cool as his TARDIS's police box disguise. Even from here, he could hear Jackie loudly talking on the phone. He'd never thought he'd ever be so happy to hear her voice.
Not far from the telephone box, seated on a bench and kicking her legs impatiently, was a small girl.
Rose.
He stopped where he was, and just watched her, reflecting on all of the good times they'd had. Of course, that was still in Rose's future. She was so small, so naive and so innocent. She had no idea what was to come. The endless opportunities that were unfolding before her, her hopes, her dreams, her ambitions, it was all so human.
He couldn't help but smile as she looked around impatiently, still kicking her small legs. Then she noticed him and began to come over. He didn't know what to do. Would it alter her timeline at all if he spoke to her? He'd spoken to her in 2005, before his regeneration, and that hadn't changed a thing. It couldn't hurt to speak to her, could it?
She tugged innocently on his jacket, trying to get his attention. He looked down and smiled. "Hello little one," he said gently.
"Will you play with me?" Rose asked, doing puppy dog eyes. How had Jackie ever said no to this kid?
"Of course," he said. "What's your name?" He asked, although he already knew the answer.
"Rose," she replied, smiling.
"Rose," the Doctor repeated. "Lovely name. I had a friend called Rose, she was brilliant."
Rose just nodded, more focused on going to play than his reminiscing.
"What would you like to play?" Rose asked.
"I don't know, you can choose," he replied.
"Um...ummm...uh...how about tag?"
"Tag sounds fine to me," the Doctor said.
"Yay!" Rose said. "You be it!" She squealed, dashing away as fast as her young legs would carry her. The Doctor followed slowly, giving her a chance to get away before catching her. Then he would run away slowly and she caught him. He was exclaiming all the while about how fast she was.
Eventually she just stopped and sat down, rubbing her eyes with her soft hands.
"I'm tired," she murmured.
"Come on, you can lie down on the bench," the Doctor said, worried that she would get her clothes dirty. Jackie would not be pleased.
"I'm too tired to walk," she moaned, looking up at him again with puppy dog eyes. "Can you carry me?"
"The bench is just over there," the Doctor said.
"Please?" Rose's lower lip trembled.
"Oh all right," the Doctor sighed. He lifted her with a grunt of effort and held her against his chest. She absently played with his bowtie for a moment.
"Thank you," she said, closing her eyes.
"You don't know how lucky you are to be alive, Rose," the Doctor said as she fell asleep. "Living your life, day after day, never knowing what tomorrow holds. You've got your whole life ahead of you, and you're going to have a really great life. You're going to do great things, save planets, and it's all still in your future, so you've got loads to look forward to."
He sat down gently on the bench, trying not to wake her. He wasn't sure how long he sat there, holding Rose to his chest. Eventually Jackie finished her phone call. As soon as she saw the Doctor holding her daughter, she stormed over.
"An' who are you?" She asked furiously.
"I was just passing by," he said. "Rose wanted me to play with me. Is she yours?"
"Yes, of course she's mine! Give 'er back!" Jackie said, eyeing him distrustfully.
"She's wonderful," the Doctor said fondly, gently handing Rose to Jackie.
Unfortunately, Rose woke up as Jackie was taking her back. "No!" She cried, balling up her fists. "I don't wanna go!"
"Come on, sweetie," Jackie said. Rose grabbed onto the Doctor's jacket, and refused to let go.
"No!" She cried again.
"Go on, Rose, go with your mother. You've still got a whole life to live, don't waste your time, because time is precious," the Doctor said, gently prying her hands away.
She eventually let go and allowed her mother to carry her away without protest. The last thing the Doctor saw of her was a pair of eyes staring at him over Jackie's shoulder.
He felt something wet on his cheek, and he realised he was crying. Seeing Rose again, when she was just a small child, only made him miss her more.
He returned to his TARDIS, a cloud of melancholy hanging around him. He missed Rose, he missed her so much. He had failed her, just like he'd failed Amy, Rory, Astrid and Donna. All he ever brought his companions was pain. He took them away from their homes, with the promise of adventure, and changed them. He brought them pain, and they almost always ended up losing something because of him. Rose lost her home, Donna lost her memories, and Amy, Rory and Astrid had lost their lives.
He was done. No more companions, he would only hurt them.
He was done!
