The Colour Green
Disclaimer: All characters belong to J.K. Rowling & Stephanie Meyer. The plot is mine. I am making no money off of this and it is simply for my (and hopefully others) amusement.
Summary: Harry Potter always loved the colour green until he went to Hogwarts. After the war is over and at the insistence of a friend, Harry leaves England to try and restore his love for the colour green. What he finds is a lot more than he ever anticipated. HP/Twilight Crossover. HP/EC Slash. Slight EC/BS at some points.
Warning: This story contains slash, death, angst, violence, swearing and sexual content. You have been warned.
Authors Note: Canon compliant for Harry Potter with slight AU (being I kept Sirius alive and most of HBP didn't happen). Near canon compliant (as far as I know) with Twilight. AU for Twilight. It should be roughly compliant, but some dates and facts will be changed to suit the story. I haven't read Twilight, so any mistakes are ignorance on my behalf.
Prologue
Harry Potter was always curious about the colour green. It haunted his dreams for as long as he could remember. Always the same bright shade mixed with a woman, his mother perhaps, screaming out in fear and pain. He would look for the colour green whenever he left the house, always trying (and failing) to find the shade of green that matched the ones of his dream. Eventually he began to love the colour green. He had silently thanked the Gods when the Dursley's decided he could be responsible for the upkeep of their garden. There among the foliage he found his solitude. It became his safe colour. For some reason he believed that no pain would come to him when he was surrounded by the green shrubs. He felt safe for the first time in his young life. He could pretend, if only for a moment, that he wasn't doing chores. That he was doing something he loved.
Then he went to Hogwarts and his love for green slowly started to diminish. The deep emerald green of the Slytherin banner all but sang to him when he entered the hall, but with his conversation with Ron Weasley fresh in his mind, Harry decided that he'd go for Gryffindor instead. For some reason he felt a part of himself die as he sat at the table swarming with red. It just didn't feel right to him.
As unexpected as it was, he found that Hogwarts was full of the colour green. From the plants that tried to eat you to the greenery of Hogwart's grounds that seemed to only gleam when it rained. Harry remembered the first time he realised Ron was jealous of him. He hated the colour green more than, if only for the fact that it was used in the term of 'green eyed monster'. Harry would lie awake at night and wonder what things would have been like if he had followed his love for green into the clutches of Slytherin house. How different would things have been? Would green still feel as safe to him as it once did?
It was when Harry was fourteen that he first saw the killing curse. He felt as though part of his sanity had fallen away when he realised the green he had been dreaming about was in fact the death of his parents. He had never felt sicker before in his life. It was then that he realised he despised the colour green. When did that happen?
When Harry was fifteen he studied glamour spells. It was then that Harry's eyes turned to the same colour grey as Malfoy's. When asked about it he would state it was a permanent change. He no longer wanted to see the world through his green eyes. The colour seemed to have betrayed him in some way. He knew that it was probably crazy and when Ron had accused him of dating the young Malfoy Harry had waved him off absently. Although at the time he remembered thinking that he wouldn't have minded dating him if only for the fact that he would be able to stare into those gray eyes. The blue and brown of his friends' eyes were far too pigmented for him.
It was at the end of Harry's sixth year when Voldemort was finally destroyed. Harry remembered standing in the Great Hall and watching as all the spells being cast illuminated the room in such an array of colour. Not one colour stood out to him as much as an eerie green of the killing curse. It shone with such a deathly glow that Harry could feel a part of himself slip away every time he saw the spell zip past himself.
The months seemed to pass quickly after the final confrontation and before Harry knew it he was halfway through his seventh, and final, year at Hogwarts. He was in History of Magic which was currently his favourite class. How could he hate it when the whole of it was gray? The way the teacher droned on and on, the way his classmates fell asleep with the dullness of it. It was all Harry could hope for and yet he still wasn't happy.
The lessons passed quickly enough and Harry always did his work with no fuss. He would sit in class, his face blank from any emotions. His eyes didn't shine like they once did. He knew that his friends were concerned for him, but he simply couldn't bring himself to care.
On a particular gray day in December, Harry found himself sitting at the lake, staring as though unseeing at the lack of colour on the surface of the lake. He could see the gray clouds reflecting on the water and it made him feel at peace. He sensed before he heard his friends approaching and he sighed to himself. Why can't they just leave me alone?
Ron plonked beside him ungracefully, while Hermione sunk softly on a rock beside him.
"Hey mate" Ron started, looking in concern at his friend's blank face. Harry didn't look at him and after a few moments longer than appropriate said hello back.
"Harry, Ron and I were wondering if you had plans to go back to Sirius' and Remus' for Christmas this year?" Hermione ventured.
Harry shrugged. "To be honest I hadn't really thought about it." He mumbled, eyes never leaving the surface of the lake.
"We think that it might do you good to leave the grounds for awhile. You haven't even been to Hogsmede this year."
"I haven't needed to buy anything." Harry replied, his voice nearly at a whisper.
Hermione leaned forward and waved a hand in his face.
"Earth to Harry. Come on. You have to snap out of whatever rut this is that you're in. You defeated Voldemort! You can finally move on with your life! He's dead Harry! He's gone and you're acting like you're the one that died. You don't have to worry anymore. It's over for you. It's time for you to move on. You've done far more than anyone could have asked you. It's time for you to find your happiness again." Hermione pressed, inching closer to the raven haired teen.
Harry couldn't refrain from rolling his eyes. Hermione huffed.
"Listen mate," Ron started softly "we're just, you know, worried. We miss who you used to be. Back in the old days."
"The old days are gone Ron." Harry muttered, drawing his knees up and hugging them to his chest. "I don't know what else you want me to say or do. This is who I am now and if you can't accept that then that's nothing I can change."
Harry closed his eyes and rested his head on his knees. He could feel the looks that Hermione and Ron were giving him, burning into the back of his skull. After several feeble attempts of engaging him in conversation the duo left Harry to his own musings.
"I told you Ron," Harry heard Hermione mutter as they walked away. "Depression is something that takes a lot of time to get through. It's not going to be fixed quickly."
Harry signed then looked over the lake once more. It seemed even gray had lost its meaning these days.
Christmas came sooner than anyone expected and Harry was sitting on his bed at 12 Grimmauld Place staring out the window at the gray sky outside. Rain drops were trickling down his window. He signed with contentment.
A knock at the door interrupted his thoughts and he turned to see his godfather standing in his door.
"Hey Kiddo. Can I come in?"
"Of course Sirius. You're always welcome."
Sirius entered the room and shut the door behind him. He sat across from Harry on the other bed in the room. He steadied himself with a deep breath before he looked up at his godson with concerned eyes. Harry took one look at the concerned eyes and knew deep inside that he wasn't going to like what his godfather had to say.
"Kiddo I have to admit that I'm a bit worried about you." Sirius said softly, his body leaning forward.
"Sirius, don't be. I'm fine." Harry replied shortly, breaking eye contact with Sirius and staring back out the window.
"You don't look fine. Ever since third year you've started to withdraw into yourself-"
"Oh please Sirius. You barely knew me in third year. All you know is that one night where Hermione and I saved you. How do you know that I haven't always been like this?" Harry snapped, turning back to meet his godfathers eyes. He was so sick of everyone trying to mould him into the perfect teenage boy.
Sirius took a deep breath at the stinging words before saying his next sentence.
"Harry, I knew you enough from watching you that year, and the beginning of fourth year, to know that what I see right now is not who you are. Something is very wrong and I just wish that you could talk to me about it."
"Nothing's wrong Sirius. I'm fine." Harry insisted.
"What's the deal with your eyes then?"
"Huh?" Harry frowned in confusion.
"I thought you liked having eyes the same colour of Lily's. Now suddenly you're bewitching them different colours. Not even colours. Shades of gray."
"I completely forgot about that."
"You forgot?"
Harry nodded and swallowed. "Yeah. As strange as it may sound to believe, my eyes have been this colour for so long now that I can barely remember what they looked like green."
Sirius pulled out his wand and pointed it at Harry. Harry reacted before he thought and grabbed the wand in front of him as he pulled his own wand out of the waist band of his jeans. He had it pointing at Sirius' neck before the other man could react.
Harry looked at the wands in front of him and opened his eyes wide in shock. He dropped both of the wands in unison and they clattered to the floor.
"It's ok kiddo. Deep breaths. Come on. Deep breaths." Sirius joined his godson on the bed and wrapped an arm around his shoulder. Harry was bent at the waist, harshly gasping deep breaths of air.
"I'm so. I'm so sorry Sirius. I swear. I didn't mean to." Harry pleaded, turning to his godfather and embracing him.
"Hey I said it was ok. It's alright." Sirius said softly, running a hand in circles on his godson's back.
"No it's not. It's wrong. It's bad. I shouldn't be like this." Harry gasped out. He pulled back from the embrace and locked eyes with Sirius. Sirius was shocked to see that Harry's gray eyes were brimming with tears.
"Hey stop that. You did nothing wrong!"
Harry stared at his godfather with a mournful look on his face.
Sirius placed his hands on either side of Harry's face.
"Come on kiddo. Lets talk about what's going on with you."
Harry sighed and stood up from the bed.
"Like I said before Sirius. There is nothing to say." Harry turned and fled from the room, leaving a confused and sorrowful Sirius Black behind.
Harry wandered around the back yard of 12 Grimmauld Place, cursing at all the green shrubbery he could see. He sank onto a stone bench, vines wrapping themselves around the legs of it. He looked around at the greenery and sighed.
He heard a twig snap behind him and whipped around to see Remus walking towards him. Harry turned around and let out a long breath. Remus sat on the bench beside him silently. He pulled out a book and started to read.
Harry turned to him quizzically for a moment before staring down at the vines below his feet. He was certain one of them just moved. Remus chuckled softly at something in his book causing Harry to give him a slight glance. Harry signed before standing up.
"You don't have to leave cub; although perhaps you should." Remus stated, not looking up from his book.
"What do you mean 'perhaps I should'?" Harry questioned his head half turned to look at the warewolf.
"I understand what it's like to survive a war and to not feel like you survived at all. To have all the pieces that you believed were your humanity strip away from yourself in layers." Remus looked up from his book.
"After your parents died and I thought Sirius responsible, I had to get away from England. I simply could not stand to be here anymore." Remus patted the bench beside him and before Harry could stop himself he plopped beside him.
"I went to this quaint urban town in Ireland. 'Navan'. It's got a relatively small population – all muggles so no one had to know about me. Sirius' family own a town house there – it was his great grandmother's who feared the hustle and bustle of a city. We headed there just after your parents got married, and then I went back after it all fell apart. It is such a lovely small village. All green and rainy. The perfect town to just relax in and find who you are. It nearly broke my heart to leave."
"Why did you leave then?"
Remus turned to Harry and gave him a small smile.
"You."
Harry frowned in confusion.
"Your mother got pregnant and when she was seven months along we decided to come back to England so we'd be here for the birth. We stayed here for the year after that and that's when everything went wrong. I went back for a few years here and there while you were growing up. I hated the idea of leaving you here all alone, but there wasn't anything that I could do in reality. The Dursley's wouldn't let me near you, Dumbledore forbade it and the ministry wouldn't allow me to even attempt to adopt you. I didn't even know where you lived because of the fideleous charm."
Harry leaned his head on Remus' shoulder.
"Sirius and I have been speaking and we think that if you took the chance to get away from here for a little while, be it weeks, months or years, that it might do you the world of good. You deserve to relax cub. You deserve to live. You deserve to find your green again."
Harry snapped his head up to Remus who simply stood from the bench, kissed Harry on the top of his head and left the teen to ponder in silence.
Sirius paced the bedroom anxiously, pausing every few laps to glance at the small clock on Harry's bedside. He told himself he would give Harry a little bit of space – but once half an hour had passed he would go and find him. In fact the clock was moving so slowly that Sirius could have sworn on his life that time was standing still.
Sirius paused in his pacing as a shadow made its way into the threshold of the bedroom door, but he soon sighed when it wasn't Harry as hoped, but Remus.
"In case you're wondering, he's out on the stone bench." Remus said, crossing his arms and leaning against the door frame.
"Did he talk with you?"
Remus raised one shoulder in a semi shrug.
"Yes, but no."
Sirius rolled his eyes in exasperation.
"What in Merlin's name is that supposed to mean?"
"It means that I suggested some things and hope that he'll pick up on what I've implied."
"And what would that be?"
"I suggested he move." With that said Remus turned and started down the hall. Sirius stood there, dumbstruck for a few seconds before chasing Remus down the hall.
"Why on earth would you do that?" Sirius said exasperatedly as he grabbed Remus' arm.
"Because what he needs is time to heal. He's been through so much, it's time that he have a break. We will still be in contact Sirius." Remus pulled his arm out of Sirius' grip and continued down the hall. Sirius frowned and followed at a much more glacial pace than before.
"I suppose you're right," he started "but it doesn't mean I have to like the fact that you suggest he be away from us."
They descended into the foyer and Remus turned to look at Sirius once again "I know this. I knew you wouldn't like it – but right now we have to think about what's best for Harry – and being here in England isn't something that's done him much good as of yet. Maybe Navan might not have that, but at least it's better than being here – in this house. The house that you've stated is like hell on earth."
Sirius sank into the dark leather chaise lounge a look of utter resignation on his handsome face. Remus smiled fondly before sitting down beside his friend and throwing an arm around his shoulder.
"It'll be ok. We can still visit. It is, afterall, your townhouse I suggest he move to. That is if he even says he wants to go."
Sirius nodded and looked out the window across from them that overlooked the back garden. He could see bright splashes of reds, yellows and purples peaking out amongst the effervescent green. He wondered how Harry was doing out there. Sirius just wanted the very best for Harry, but at the same time he wanted to protect him too. He wanted to nurture him and hide him away from all the torment that the world had. He assumed that Harry had seen too much torture for his young years and wanted to make the rest of his life as pain free as possible. He sighed and sank back into the chair, hoping that somehow it would all work out.
Harry sat on the stone bench and watched, with melancholy fascination, the shadows his feet made along the vines as he swang them back and forth. Remus' words were echoing in his ears and Harry didn't quite know what to make of them. Should he take a leap and just move to this small town in Ireland? Or should he stick it out at Hogwarts and see what would happen.
If he was honest with himself, Harry couldn't really see how he'd be able to live another few months at Hogwarts. The four walls of the castle, that were once his comfort, were now trapping him inside. But if he were to move - what of his education? How was he supposed to survive in the wizarding world without graduating? He knew that you only had to be seventeen years of age before they were allowed to leave Hogwarts, but not many places of work would offer a position to someone who hadn't even graduated Hogwarts. He could kiss being an auror goodbye. That is if he even wanted to be an auror anymore. Perhaps he had seen just enough action to last his lifetime.
Harry looked up to the sky and wondered what his parents thought of all of this. Which direction would they suggest he go? From the stories he heard he would imagine his mother would want him to continue in at school but his father would probably tell him to get out while he could. But then again, his parents weren't there anyway. He never had the chance to speak with them and find out what they wanted him to do.
Harry took a deep breath in and closed his eyes. Maybe he just had to take a leap of faith and hope that it turned out for the best. Afterall – what's the worst that could happen? As that thought crossed his mind Harry burst out into laughter. Yeah, with his luck he'd end up fighting a dark lord within months. Either that or winding up dead in – Suddenly Harry gave a yelp as something curled around his ankle and pulled, hard. Harry fell forward and hit the ground with a thud, knocking the wind out of him. Suddenly his insides felt cool as he started to be dragged under the seat and into the vine. He glanced behind him and wished he hadn't as a huge red flower opened its jaws as though ready to suck him into its centre. Harry kicked his leg hard, but the vine didn't let go. He nearly laughed when he thought of the irony "Boy-who-lived – killed by giant venus flytrap."
Harry yelped as the vine tightened around his ankle. Why did he leave his wand with Sirius? "Never go anywhere without your wand." Moody had said. He kicked again, and by some stroke of luck he managed to impale the vine on a sharp rock. He pulled his leg out of the grip and rolled out from under the seat.
Harry didn't look back as he bolted towards the house, climbed the stairs and stumbled through the back door. He locked eyes with Sirius and Remus, who were sitting on a lounge across from him and looking at him with identical startled expressions.
"Your plant-" he started, fixing his shirt and standing upright. "-tried to eat me."
Sirius and Remus stared at the teen for a short while before Sirius gave a sudden bark of laughter. Remus scowled and hit him over the back of his head.
"Thank you for your concern, Sirius." Harry scoffed sarcastically before turning and stalking off towards the kitchen. Sirius gasped his breath back and stood up quickly, running after his angry godson.
"Are you ok cub?" he asked, gripping onto Harry's wrist and turning him around to face him.
"Yes. I'm fine. It just dragged me away for a little bit."
"The vines?" Sirius questioned, straightening Harry's collar up. Harry looked affronted.
"You knew about them?" Harry stepped back out of his godfather's reach and glared accusingly at the man.
"Well yes. They're rather commonplace in wizarding gardens."
Harry signed and stalked off into the kitchen before the other men could object. Remus chuckled softly and followed the teen into the kitchen, Sirius trailing behind looking almost like his animagus form with his tail between his legs. Harry was sitting at the table, a red apple shining in his hands.
Sirius took the seat across from him and looked at him with concern.
"I'm sorry kiddo. Although it didn't seem to rattle you too much" Sirius nodded towards the apple in Harry's hands.
Harry just looked at Sirius and shrugged. "Vengence" he added simply, taking a big bite out of the shiny fruit.
"Sometimes I forget you weren't raised among all this magic."
"Well, I don't think I'm going to be around magic for a little while." Harry admitted between bites. Sirius swallowed and lowered his eyes briefly while Remus gave a knowing smile to the teen.
"How long will you be gone for?" Sirius asked, meeting Harry's eyes. Harry signed and raised one shoulder in a semi shrug.
"I really don't know. All I know is that I need to clear my head for a bit. That is if you'll let me stay at your Townhouse in Navan."
Sirius sunk back in his chair defeated.
"Kiddo you know what's mine is yours."
Harry smiled in thanks and took another bite of his apple. He chewed as he pondered on whether the decision would have been the right one. But – only one way to figure it out.
"I thought I'd leave tomorrow. Just get out there while I've got the guts, you know?"
Remus sat beside Sirius and smiled across at Harry.
"We'll take you tomorrow. We'll notify the school and let them know that your education will be postponed for the moment. I'm sure everyone will understand."
Harry nodded in thanks as he took the last few bites of his apple.
"Now I just have to tell the gang upstairs."
Sirius let out a bark of laughter at the idea of Harry telling Hermione-bookworm that he wasn't going to return.
"You're on your own there I'm afraid."
Harry gave a nervous chuckle as he stood from the table. He hugged his Dad's old friends before leaving the kitchen and heading upstairs to tell his friends. He could already imagine the reactions. As he knocked on Hermione and Ginny's bedroom door, something inside him seemed to settle. That's when he realised that at this point, this was the right decision for him and he was looking forward to what it was going to bring.
Authors Note: Thanks so much for reading. I'm not sure how long it will be between updates. I'm currently working on chapter one. I'm only just getting back into writing, so I am a little rusty. I'm hoping that some reviews with constructive criticism may motivate me a little more in writing, but I'm not the sort of person to keep chapters "hostage" for reviews. Please be kind in your review, I am a sensitive person and I find writing is very "soul baring."
As you all know this is Harry Potter/Twilight and HP/EC slash. Note that the Cullens will be in the next chapter. This story may have 20 – 30 chapters. Once I write a bit more I shall let you all know what to expect.
Thanks once more for reading and reviewing. Untill next time =)
