Disclaimer: Hikaru no Go is created by Hotta Yumi & Obata Takeshi. I do not own nor profit from using these characters.
A/N: This is the first time that I'm writing for HikaGo so I hope I didn't do it too badly. It was originally intended to be a VERY late present to my friend, J-chan whose birthday was in January and I didn't do anything for her. (Gomen!) since she wouldn't stop raving about how much she loves this pair during the school year... Anyway, enjoy.
Edit: 08-18-04 Errors that I didn't catch before that would've caused plotholes. Thanks to Rachiru for catching one of the mistakes!
WARNING: Contains shounen-ai and cats. If you're allergic, please back away. Oh, and OOCness all around! Can't forget that! AND I am not responsible for injuries you may be inflicted upon reading this.
A M B I G U I T Y
Unstable ends and uncertain beginnings; must you run?
By: SukiAme
The lightly crystallized flakes of snow slowly drifted onto the brightly lit pavement of the shopping district. The bright lights of the many department stores illuminated the city and at every corner, there were college students working part time for the new years rush. Everywhere one turned, there were advertisements of cleaning products, manufactured nen'gajoo (new years greeting cards), and signs for ordering pre-made osechiryoori (traditional new years food that lasts for 3 days).
Along these streets filled with happy families and excited teenage couples, a sixteen year old boy with golden locks contrasting ink-black hair walked solemnly along the road. A navy blue scarf was wrapped around his throat while a milk-chocolate brown coat that went a little past mid-thigh hung closely to his body. In the lively night of the large city of Tokyo, the teen wandered the street, as silent as a specter in the ghost world around him, as he slowly drowned in his thoughts.
"Ra-ow!"
The boy looked up in surprise to see an ebony black cat with vanilla white paws and emerald green eyes hiss viciously at a orange striped tabby cat. The orange tabby fell in a heap at the boy's feet as the darker cat turned away and ran from sight. All the while, the orange feline stared after the the direction that the royal looking stray ran off.
The boy bent down and beckoned the cat to come closer and slowly, the cat cautiously approached the boy's outstretched hand. When the cat got close enough to the boy, the cat bent down and stared at the warm, pink hand of the boy's. The cat then placed its own paw on it and then brought its head into the hand and licked it with affection.
With a small smile, the boy picked the cat up and walked toward a darkened park with the cat cradled closely to his body.
The lamp posts lit a path within the rapidly darkening night and the sand graveled path crunched loudly under the boy's heavy footsteps. When he saw a bench, he sat down with the cat still cradled to his body.
"Hi, I'm Hikaru," he said to the cat with a grin on his face. He looked at the cat, "You don't have a name. I'm gonna call you..." Hikaru paused at looked up at the sky for a moment, "Taiyoo (sun) because of your color. Tai for short."
The tabby licked his icy cold fingers as if in approval causing a small chuckle to escape the teen's lips.
"So, what's up? Did that other cat dump you?" he asked the cat. The cat mewed in response as Hikaru whispered, "Me too." Hikaru gave the cat a sad smile that didn't reach his listless eyes. The cat watched him as he began his story, "I wish I didn't do that. I wish I could turn back time and do it over," Hikaru forced a small laugh, "Doesn't this sound familiar?" He quieted down and continued, "But... this time, I didn't regret it."
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Christmas Eve
Hikaru ran down the stairs of his home as he struggled to put on his jacket and scarf. Atop his head bore a red and white "Santa's Hat" that added cheeriness to the eyes of the sixteen year old. He hopped off the landing and quickly slipped on his shoes. Straightening up, he turned and pulled open the door before he finally paused.
"I'm going!"
"Have a safe trip!" His mother called to him as she appeared at the entrance of the kitchen, drying a bowl with a white rag in her hand.
Hikaru smiled at him mother before he turned and slammed the door shut behind him, giddily trudging into the early evening.
-
Hikaru stared up the stark white building of the Go Institute before he walked to the entrance and pulled the door open. With an excited smile on his face, he ran over to the elevator and pushed the button that indicated to go up. After a few short moments of waiting, the elevator doors popped open and he stepped in the small box. He pressed a button and waited as the number lit. The elevator opened and Hikaru stepped out and walked down the decorated halls.
He glanced around the floor in wonder. There were so many people there, some whom he recognized, some whom he didn't. Wires of Christmas lights hung against the windows that overlooked the oncoming evening. Mistletoe and garlands were hung at various places and the crystal chandelier in the middle of the room rained a rainbow of colors on the other various objects in the room.
"Hey, Shindou!"
Hikaru looked to the familiar voice and laughed from sheer giddiness, "Waya!"
He moved past some people and headed toward his brunet friend who held a glass of punch which color could only be rivaled by his scarlet face.
"You look flushed; did you drink sake or something?' Hikaru asked suppressing a laugh when the other teen's cheeks grew to an even deeper crimson.
"NO!" Waya shouted before he glanced around and pulled Hikaru off by a window so they were more or less ignored, "Isumi-san drank a little too much sake and is completely drunk right now."
"That still doesn't explain anything."
"He's," Waya struggled with his words while he gestured to the crowd of laughing people, "He-"
Waya was cut off by a loud bale of laugher from another one of the party-goers, "Hahahaha-! I didn't know Isumi-kun was a kissing fiend!"
Hikaru stared at Waya's red face and then to the direction in which the laughter came. After a moment, what happened finally clicked and Hikaru - unable to contain his laughter - exploded with guffaws.
Waya glared miserably at Hikaru and yelled loud enough so that he didn't attract unwanted attention, "It isn't funny, Shindou!"
"But it is!" Hikaru retorted between gasps of air.
"If you want to be technical about it, it wasn't entirely Isumi-san's fault."
Hikaru turned to the familiar drawl of his orange haired friend, "Ochi!"
Ochi too held a glass of blood red punch. His calculating eyes shone dully behind his round glasses and the slightly mocking smirk on his lips irritated the blushing boy. "Waya was standing under mistletoe." He paused and looked thoughtful, "And if you ask me, I'd say Waya enjoyed it." Waya blanched at the comment while Hikaru was thrown into another fit of giggles, "Not that it's any of my business. What you do with your free time doesn't concern me."
"No one asked you, Ochi!" Waya snapped in embarrassment, "And stop laughing, Shindou!"
"Sorry," Hikaru mumbled as he clutched his sides, "I... hahaha!" Hikaru laughed again, shaking his head while he limped toward the halls, "I think I'm going to step out in the halls for a moment."
"You should laugh more," Hikaru heard Ochi say to Waya as he limped away, "People tend to live longer that way."
Hikaru brought a hand to his mouth as he quickly moved out of the room and into the hallway.
As soon as he was in the deserted hallway he leaned against a wall and slid onto the floor, his entire body shaking from mirth. His Santa's hat fell astray and onto the polished tiled floor as he brought a hand to brush back his long bangs away from his flushing face.
"Shindou?"
Hikaru looked up to see the dark green haired, Touya Akira watching him with an inscrutable interest. On Akira's arm was a long coat which hung stiffly as if unused to frequent use while his face flushed with a light scarlet from the overly warm room. With help from the wall, Hikaru pushed himself up and straightened his clothes.
With a grin on his face, Hikaru turned to face Akira and laughed, "Hey Touya, you're leaving?"
Akira nodded before hugging the coat closer to his chest, "My parents are waiting at home for a Christmas celebration."
"You don't seem like the type to celebrate Christmas with trees and stuff," Hikaru said as he leaned in and stared closely at the brown eyed boy.
"Yes; well, I have to go now," Akira informed Hikaru as he glanced at his watch, "Will you come to the Go salon on the 26th?"
"Yeah."
"Alright, I'll see you then," Akira gave a short wave and walk toward the elevator.
"Wait, Touya," Hikaru called when Akira got to the end of the hallway and pressed pressed the button for down. He pause and turned around while his face screwed up in question.
"Yes?"
Hikaru strode over to Akira and stopped in front of him. He watched Akira stare curiously at him before he turned his gaze to look up to the ceiling. He eyed the small evergreen sprig that hung above the other boy and then looked back down. Auburn met azure eyes.
Drunk on giddiness, he leaned forward and met the calescent lips of Touya Akira.
Contact lasted for only a second. Hikaru was slammed into the opposite wall by a sharp punch to the face. Consciousness drenched him as a bucket of water would when a throbbing pain pulsated in his cheek. Silence rung as time pulled to a stop.
Hikaru kept his eyes pinned to the floor, not daring to look up when the pain from his cheek spread to the rest of his head. He brought an arm to his abdominal area and clutched it close to him. He opened his mouth, to apologize, or at least explain; But no sound would emit from his closed throat. His chest seemed to constrict itself and compress the size of his heart and lungs as if squeezing the life from him.
Had he looked up, it would've been harder to look at Akira for the look in the boy's cerulean eyes was clouded by a tempest of loathing and anger with his fist covered his mouth.
A sharp ding sliced through the silence and when Hikaru finally looked up, Akira was gone.
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"-and that's what happened," Hikaru concluded with a lonely smile, "I didn't have the courage to go see him. It..." Hikaru paused as he absently stroked the cat like it was a portable heater and looked down, "... kinda hurts.
"So, will you tell me what happened to you?" Hikaru asked with a grin. The cat stared up at him before its ears perked up and twitched. It looked away and mewed before it leaped off Hikaru's lap and ran into the bushes behind him. Hikaru jumped with surprise and turned to track where the tabby ran toward only to be met with the annoying undergrowth and darkness.
Hikaru brought his cold hand to his face as he moaned in annoyance before he ruffled the bushes in search of the cat.
"Hey, Tai? Yo, come out," Hikaru called to the cat in vain search, "Yo, Tai?"
Hikaru froze when he felt footsteps pound the soft gravel on the pathway and then stop behind him. Fear and panic set in when he felt a large hand drop on his shoulder and a huge rush of adrenaline flowed through his body as his muscles tensed and the pace of his heart quickened. He threw his arms straight up in the air and shouted, "I don't have any money!"
Shallow and panted breaths met Hikaru's eardrums and after a long and tense moment of anticipation, an airy and breathless voice breathed out, "Shindou."
Hikaru's hand shook as he slowly lowered it to his side. There was only one person who ever said his name in such manner and it wasn't reassuring that the person was standing behind him. Hikaru could only guess the expression on the other person's face as he focused his own concentration on the bush before him.
With a slightly strained grin, Hikaru turned his head to meet the inevitable. A piercing cerulean gaze caught his own as he naturally called the other person's name, "Touya.
"Geez, don't scare me like that!" Hikaru joked as he collapsed onto the wooden bench, "I thought you were going to mug me or something."
Silence ensued. Some ways away, off and far, the city's night traffic buzzed with excitement. Both boys listened to the eerie ring of the night which was the only thing that filled the silence.
"What are you doing here?" Hikaru asked.
Akira's face was contorted in an annoyed and miffed fashion, "Why didn't you come to the salon, Shindou?" He didn't say it in an accusing manner, for it was masked with anger. But there was a hidden emotion that Hikaru detected in his tone. He didn't dare say it but wondered, could Akira have been hurt?
He sighed, feeling bad about it. It was pretty obvious why he didn't go; remember earlier: the entire incident during boonenkai?
He glanced at the boy standing before he slumped his head forward. He didn't have the will to see him yet, and from the other boy's tone, it was obvious that he was still angry so he felt a little guilty about it. But, there was another part of him that was angry at the darker haired boy. He couldn't really forgive him for that incident as well.
"Answer me, Shindou! Why," Akira's voice cracked a little when a took a hesitant but hysterical step toward the half-blond boy. "Why didn't you-" He dropped off the rest of the sentence, but Hikaru knew what Akira would've said but knowing that he didn't have much will to do anything about it.
He didn't care; at least, not really. "I didn't think," Hikaru began as he slowly rose his head. His blond locks slid out of his face as if it was water, revealing emerald eyes that held no aggressive nor defensive barriers. "That it would be... appropriate, in a certain sense. There's really no point in playing if your opponent is wishing for a pitchfork to be shoved down your spine." He forced his eyes to look at Akira in the face, even if the heart clenching feeling wouldn't leave him alone, "I don't know about you, but I'm really not a masochist."
"So you didn't come because you thought it was inappropriate? What kind of a player are you if you can't deal with a little spite?" Akira asked as the anger ebbed away quickly losing respect for his rival, "You're just going to run?"
"I don't have to justify myself to you," Hikaru bit back, pulling himself to his feet and straightening his clothes. He shoved his hands into his coat pocket and brushed past Akira, "See you next year, Touya."
"Don't you dare run from me, Shindou!" Akira snapped as he reached out and halted Hikaru by the arm pulling it out of his pocket, "I won't let you leave without a proper answer!"
"What answer? What more do you really have to say? What more do I have to say?" Hikaru snapped just as angrily, "If you want me to apologize, too bad for you. I'm not going to do that. If anything, you should apologize for hitting me."
"You surprised me!"
"And that's supposed to make it okay?"
Akira didn't say anything while his grip was still tight on the blonde's arm. "No," he murmured with his eyes casted upon the floor. Hikaru felt Akira's hand slipped from holding his arm to clutching the ends of his sleeves. "I-..."
Hikaru bit back a small gasp of surprise when he felt warm hands wrap around his icy hand and then Akira's forehead weighed upon his shoulder. The previous tension seemed to dissipate before he heard a soft whisper from the brown eyed boy, "Don't run from me, Shindou."
A soft mewl caught Hikaru's attention and he turned to see that sitting on the bench were the two cats that he saw earlier. The tabby watched the pair while the darker cat laid next to it as if resting. His eyes shifted from the cats to the boy who still clung to him, loosely but a little desperately-his eyes not meeting the chocolate irises that stared at the top of his head.
"Touya," he said softly trying to catch the attention of the other boy. His own gaze trailed over to the cats while he watched the orange tabby lie next to the regal cat, "Look." He felt Akira's head lift from his shoulder and turn to the strays, the crystalline eyed boy's hands never loosened or wavered from his grip on Hikaru. "The orange one... his name is Tai."
"And the black one?" Akira asked quietly.
"I don't know," Hikaru answered uncertainly, eyes tracing the silhouette of the felines.
". . . Kurone," Akira finally whispered, "I want to call it Kurone."
: : owari : :
