Title: Demonstration

Summary: With Hitomi not able to tell the kids were babies come from, Hisagi decides that a presentation is better then words. THIS IS ALSO NOT A LEMON!

Pairing: Hisagi x OC (Hitomi from DOA)

Rated: T for sexual type remarks, the lesson of sex, and some cussing

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or DOA. Simple as that

Note: I was going to use Kasumi, but nah I decided not too. The summary makes it sound like a lemon, but it's not, this story is more or less supposed to target the humor in it.

So I hope you enjoys like, laugh, and enjoy!

Demonstration

"Where do babies come from?"

The most dreadful question that most parents can't answer. I guess depending on what age your child is would depend on your answer. But how to tell a six year-old, twelve year old, and a sixteen year-old?

Hisagi sat on his couch, his feet on the table, and a newspaper in his hand. It was nine in the morning, so all he was wearing was sweat pants and no shirt. But he had a crafted body, so he had no reason to be ashamed. You'd think, he'd wear one around the kids, but he didn't. Not that they really minded or anything.

While he was on the couch, his six year-old son was on the floor watching T.V/playing with his toys. This would be the reason why he was reading the newspaper, since the kids pretty much owned everything in the house. His twelve-year-old daughter was on one of the chairs with her headphones in her ears. He's not lying when he says that, that is all she does in her spare time. And his sixteen year-old son, who was in his room doing god knows what!

It wasn't their plan to have kids, but you can't take them back after it already happened. But they couldn't be happier, their kids weren't bad nor were they good either. They were pretty much in-between. Hitomi pretty much named all of them, since she was excited the most, but no matter what there was going to be a Hisagi Jr. And that was that.

The littlest one, Hisagi Akira Shuuhei Jr. was sitting on the floor watching T.V. He had his cute little telephone and a couple of blocks and some books. He was the cutest of them all! He had Hitomi's aqua blue eyes and soft brown short brown hair, which he also got from her. His was smart for his age, but even he had his cute moments. He was no taller then 4 feet, along with a cute voice.

As he watched T.V, a baby cartoon came on. It was simply a stork carrying a new baby to its parents. Akira was amazed to see that it actually fit in that little sack. He started to make conclusions in his head, but they didn't add up. Then when the little light-bulb in his head flickered, he turned to his dad, "Dad."

"What?" Hisagi answered, behind the newspaper with a bored tone.

"Where do babies come from?" Akira asked cutely.

This made Hisagi put down his paper for a minute, looking at his son with a skeptical look. What was he suppose to tell? He was WAY to young to know about the birds and the bees. "The stork," Hisagi answered simply, putting the paper back in his face. Now Akira was puzzled and looked at his sister, who was listening.

"Oh please," she said, "How many times are you going to tell us that one?"

Hisagi heard the smart-ass tone in her voice and put down his paper once more, "What?" "How many times are you going to tell us that one?" she repeated with a roll of her eyes. Hikaru pulled herself up to sit right in the chair, "really dad?" This was his middle child who he said that got most of Hitomi's traits. But she argued and said that if he should be pointing fingers, it should be at himself. She had silver-colored eyes and short shoulder length mixed brown and black hair. Of course being a teen, she would be snotty, but she was like that even as a child. Standing at about '5' "2", she was tall all right.

She pushed back her hair, "Come on dad, where do babies really come from?"

"And why should I tell you?" Hisagi asked back, looking back at her with the same a smart-ass expression." She choked on her words, unsure of what to say. She fell back in her seat, her arms crossed with a small pout. She continued to push buttons on her music player and little Akira sat on the floor, more confused then before.

"You wanna know?" another voice added. Walking down the stairs came the oldest son. Kyo Shuuhei, he was truly a remake of Hisagi. Same hair, same face, same everything, but his eye color was a shiny silver. Still, he had all the traits his dad did, his charm, his looks, a toned body, and smile that would knock every girl off her feet. He had a way with words, he did. What more could you ask for?

"And how do you know?" Hisagi asked, pinching the bridge of his noise. "Health class," Kyo answered. He leaned on Hikaru's chair and whispered into her ear. From her face expressions, Hisagi guessed that his son was saying the right thing. There have been some cases, where Hisagi could have guessed that he was in the closet, but he never asked.

Hikaru looked at her older brother, her eyes still in shock, but on the other hand she had some doubt, "Are you sure?" He nodded his head and quickly she turned to her dad, "Is that true?"

"Is what true?" a lovely asked. Hitomi came out of the kitchen, in her p.j. bottoms and sky blue tank to go with it. Her short shoulder length brown hair was combed back as she sat next to her lover on the couch, planting a small kiss on his cheek. She patted her legs, talking to her littlest, "Come here honey." Akira quickly got up from his seat, grabbing his play telephone and sitting in his mothers lap, getting comfortable. Hisagi warned Hitomi to stop treating him like that, but she ignored him. He was way to cute to let go. He was a mama's boy and there was nothing wrong with that.

"So what are you guys talking about?" Hitomi asked, brushing her hand through her son's brown locks.

"We wanna know where babies come from," Hikaru said directly. It took a minute for Hitomi to process that statement. She looked at Hisagi, who nodded his head back to confirm it. She looked back at her kids, unsure of what to say, "And why do you wanna that?"

"I wanna know mommy," Akira said cutely, tilting his head far back to look up at her. She wanted to squeal at her son's cuteness. How could she say no to him. "Did you ask your dad?" Hitomi asked.

"He gave us that crappy stork story," Hikaru said.

"Hikaru!" Hitomi said in a tone telling her daughter to watch her attitude. Hitomi looked back at Hisagi, who was scanning through the newspaper. It took him about a minute to finally look back at her in a confused way. Hitomi threw her eyes to the kids for a second, but he still had no clue what the hell she was doing.

She sighed and leaned back into the couch, putting the paper up as a curtain for them to talk privately, "Should we tell them?"

"Why?" he asked back.

"Why not? I think they're old enough to know."

"Why?"

"Hisagi! They are teens now! They're going to have sex sometime soon! Well hopefully not Hikaru, but your oldest son might. And it might not even be a girl! Not that there is anything wrong with that," she smirked, wondering if that did the trick. And it did. "It should be! He got his looks from me for crying out loud!" Hisagi said back, unhappy about the idea.

"Okay, then. But we will tell Akira the stork story still," Hitomi said, planting another kiss on his check.

Pushing the newspaper down from his hands, Hitomi sat facing the kids ready to tell the wonders of having a child. Maybe not the birth part, that might scar them for life and they didn't need that.

"Akira honey," she said sweetly, "I'm going to tell you okay? When mommy's and daddy's have so much love they need to put somewhere right? So the stork rewards for that love and gives them something to love even more. Either way sweetie, you are our pride and joy, just as your sister and brother." She could hear Hisagi mumble under his breath about the pride and joy part.

"Does that answer your question?" Hitomi asked her son. Akira smiled brightly and nodded, "I love you mommy." He hugged her tightly and looked over at is dad, his big aqua eyes beaming, "I love you too daddy." Hisagi may have been a tough guy, but even couldn't deny all that cuteness, "I love you too, little man." Akira giggled, his smile growing bigger.

"Son, do me a favor," Hitomi smiled, "I need you to grab your little CD player and put the volume on really high. We all know that you love to sing!" Akira nodded, climbing out of her lap. He seated himself on the floor, grabbing his little headset and pushed the button on the player.

They waited until he started singing, "OH I JUST CAN'T WAIT TO BE KING!"

Yep, he was oblivious to the world right now.

"Now you two," Hitomi said in a more serious tone, "You wanna know?" "How many times are you going to ask us?" Kyo said, "Yes, we wanna know."

"Do you two have any idea?" Hisagi asked, joining into the conversation. Hikaru thought for a minute, turning her music off, "I know the guy sticks his something somewhere...

"It's called a dick, you idiot," Kyo said in such a jackass tone. Hitomi could hear Hisagi laughing behind her. Well at least they totally didn't have a clue.

"Okay," Hitomi said already knowing that this was going to be one hell of a talk, "And you Kyo?"

Kyo smiled like he knew, "Of course. The guy sticks is dick in her ass." Both Hitomi and Hisagi now looked confused. They took a minute to figure it out how he could came up with that idea.

"You mean his ass," Hikaru corrected him, "I never heard of a girl getting it up the ass?"

"Maybe it was his ass...?" Kyo thought.

"Alright enough with the 'a' word," Hisagi stated, "And Kyo, when in the hell did you learn that?" Kyo shrugged his shoulders, his thoughts scrambled now. Hitomi looked at him, giving him the look that said yeah-he-might-be-gay. He shook his head back, "Alright dear, you example it to them." She wanted to say 'why me?' but since it was her idea...

"Alright, since you guys have no clue what you're talking about?" She asked. They responded with a nod of their heads, Kyo took a seat on the arm of his sister's chair. Hitomi looked at Akira to see him still nodding his head to the music. He shouldn't' be listening to the next things being said.

"Okay," she said, clearing her throat, "To start from the being. When two people, a boy and girl, love each other very much *grabs Hisagi's hand* they have something called sexual intercourse..." "Pretty much means that they fuck," Hisagi restated from them to understand. Hitomi slapped his shoulder not too hard, surprised that he'd actually say something like that.

"Yeah, if you wanna say it like that," she said, turning back to her kids, "When these two people have sex, in a more simpler term, the guy puts his dick into the women's..." The kids were nearly falling out of their seats, waiting to hear the next part, but she stopped, the words not escaping her lips.

"Well mom?" Hikaru asked, "Into her what?"

"Yeah babe," Hisagi smirked, nudging her a bit, "into her what?" She looked back at him, her face blank. She fell back beside him, whispering into his ear, "I can't tell them." "Why not?" he whispered back. "I'm just not that type of person," she answered, "It's not that I can't talk about sex, but it makes me feel weird."

"I'm not telling them!" he said back, "what are we suppose to do?"

"I don't know."

"Can't we show them?" he questioned. "How?" she asked, "We don't own a porno. Well at least I don't!" Hisagi rolled his eyes slowly, making her slap his shoulder again, "I was going to say that I used to have one!"

"Got anymore bright ideas?" she asked sarcastically, turning to look at the kids for a second, "I doubt we can show them..." The minute her aqua-colored eyes found his, all the nerves in her body seemed to turn numb. He was looking at her with such lustful eyes, where did all of it come from? "Hisagi?" she questioned, his face now merely inches away from hers. "You know," he smiled, his finger tracing her jaw line, "I've got another idea, lets demonstrate it..."

Before she could say anything, he managed to throw her on the couch and climb on top of her. "Hisagi, cut it out!" she said squirming to get away. He smiled, his hands gripping her wrists to keep her under him, but Hitomi had some fight in her, so no way in hell was she going to go down that easy!

The kids' had their eyes wide open in shock. One minute their parents were educating them about sex, the next their fighting on the couch like kids. They looked at one another, confused.

Throughout his singing, Akira looked over at his parents, lost for a minute but then excited. Putting down his headphones and jumping up into the air, he was acting like a little cheerleader, "Alright, mommy and daddy are fighting! GO DAD! Give her the old one, two *punches his fists into the air*" The other two, wanted to laugh at their brother's goofiness.

Still struggling, Hitomi managed to get herself up, pulling him under her, her hips straddling his, "Are you done?" "I knew you loved to be on top," he said back with a cocky smirk. "GO MOM!" Akira cheered, "SLAP HIM AROUND A BIT!" That threw her off and she once again found herself under him, struggling to get free.

Connecting his lips to the skin on her neck, he made her sentences come out all wrong. "His...agi...stop..." she groaned, feeling his lips getting closer to her sensitive part. It was amazing how her body fell easily to his touch, instead of struggling, now, she had a leg wrapped around his waist, her hand into his black hair, and her head to the side for him.

He smirked kissing her skin some more, his hand kneading her breast to add more noise to her voice. When he got to her collar bone, he bit down, making her back arch and a long enough moan escape her throat.

That was the sign for the kids to leave. Hikaru grabbed Akira and quickly they headed up the steps, Kyo by her heel. Before they even reached the top, Kyo tugged the sleeve on her arm to get her attention. She peaked over her shoulder to see him pointing at their parents.

"Akira, go to your room, brother and I will be there shortly," Hikaru smiled. "But I wanna see mommy and daddy fight," Akira whined cutely. "Believe me sport, they aren't fighting," Kyo chuckled, watching the scene like a movie. Akira made his way up the rest of the stairs, he feet making soft sounds on the carpet. Hikaru waited till she heard the sound of music from a toy, and then she joined her brother.

"So what are we watching?" she asked bored.

"This is what sex is," he answered, "This is how you make babies." "So what are they doing now?" she questioned, now actually listening. "Their just touching each other," he answered, "I think that's suppose to make them feel good or something."

"Then dad must be a pro," Hikaru said back. They waited a couple more seconds watching and listening. Hisagi had the upper hand in this one, but he was the on bottom, but again he had control. He was seated perfectly on the couch, as Hitomi straddled his hips, her hands to lean on as they were on top of the couch.

"Now what are they doing?" Hikaru asked. "Well dad is sticking his dick into mom's pussy."

"Are you sure that's what it's called?" she asked. "No shit Hikaru," Kyo said back, "What else would it be called?"

"So I have one too?"

"Yep."

"And you have a …"

"Yep, you know what they say," Kyo smirked, "Like father like some. And man is dad huge."

"Oh please," Hikaru chuckled, "If you actually had one." Before Kyo could come back with a snappy sentence, Hitomi's voice echoed through the house now, "HISAGI!" Followed by the sound on skin hitting skin, as well as their lips smacking constantly together. Hikaru took her leave, pretty much satisfied that her question was answered. She grabbed her brother by the collar, making him move.

Honestly, should two kids watch their parents have sex in the living room on the couch? They might not even sit on the couch ever again now...

*Later that day*

"Alright," Hitomi said, running a hand through her brown hair. Her and Hisagi had to fix the couch from the mess that they just made. She didn't know how he got her to do it, but he just did.

She called the kids down about five minutes ago and now they were back in their normal spots like before. Akira was back on the floor, watching T.V, not really paying them any mind. Hikaru was back on her chair, without her headphones. And Kyo was sitting on the arm, his hands in his lap.

"Alright, I know you guys were watching," Hitomi said a blush starting to show on her nose. Her hand was rubbing the inside of Hisagi's knee as he leaned back with his arms crossed. "And we heard what you said too," he added, "For one watch the mouth, don't say things like that so freely. And son? We will never match my size, just so you know." Hitomi chuckled softly.

"Does that answer your guys question?" She asked.

"Not really," Hikaru spoke up, "We wanted to know how babies are made."

"Babies are made when, the male gives his seed to the women," Hisagi answered flatly, "Son, do ever get that white stuff?" Kyo nodded his head, thinking back to a coupe of times. "Yeah, that's your seed. So when you release it inside the girl, she has it now and then 9 months later a baby is born."

They both nodded their head as they processed all this information. "So how do they get out of there?"

"That's another story," Hitomi said, "We can save that for later."

After settling that the whole conversation was over and things were normal. Akira was in his room after he fell asleep on the floor. Hikaru was back in her room, reading a book or something. Hitomi was back in the kitchen working on her newest creation that was a dessert. She always had a sweet tooth. Hisagi had the living room back to himself, so his feet were up and he still had no shirt on.

Kyo came down the stairs, immediately sitting down next to his dad. "What do you want?" Hisagi asked, changing the channel. Kyo hesitated for a moment, unsure if he should ask. That was Hisagi's cue to leave his comfort zone and pay attention to his oldest child, "Alright you have my full attention."

"Dad?" he asked, his voice not so high, "Can you get a guy pregnant."

And in the distance, Hisagi could hear Hitomi drop whatever it was in her hands.


You cannot believe how much I feel giggly from using that vocabulary. I don't talk like that at all period, not even in my head. But it worked for this story.

So I hope you guys enjoyed.

Review if you want

And keep reading on!