Disclaimer: I do not own the Ace Attorney Series or any of its character. All elements belong to Capcom.
Notes: A fluffy little oneshot I wanted to put up for the sake of Valentine's Day. Loosely based on a little back-and-forth I had with a co-worker a while back. Putting it up early because grad school is in full swing and the next two weeks for me are going to be pretty much free of leisure time.
A Tough Couple of Days
Phoenix sat on the opposite end of Maya's favorite booth at Maya's favorite burger joint, watching as his plucky assistant unwrapped her first of four cheeseburgers with the look of sheer anticipation etched on her face that only a burger could bring. In all seriousness, why wasn't she 400 pounds? Phoenix wasn't exactly in the best of shapes. He had a black eye, his left nostril was packed, his suit was too tight, he was starving, and he had recently been sifting through a garbage dumpster.
"Why is it I wonder?" He thought to himself keeping his eyes on the ever exuberant Maya Fey as she took that first glee-inducing bite.
Two Days Ago
Phoenix was sitting on his couch when the door opened. Maya walked in with a large plastic bag over her shoulder which contained Phoenix's blue suit.
"Maya?" He said standing.
"Hi Nick." She smiled.
"Maya, didn't I ask you to take my suit to the cleaners?"
"Yeah, I did, washed dried and ironed." She replied setting it on the couch.
"Wh-what do you mean 'dried'?"
"Don't be stupid Nick, I had to dry it after I took it out of the washing machine. I wasn't gonna bring it home wet you know."
"Wh-what? M-Maya, did you take my suit to the Laundromat?" He stammered.
"Well yeah, where else was I going to take it?"
"To the dry cleaners!" He shouted. "This suit is dry clean only!" He took it from the bag and looked it over. "I-It's ruined." He squeaked, feeling like he was going to cry.
"Well, why didn't you tell me that?"
"I asked you to take it to the cleaners, I even asked if you knew where it was." He answered feeling too depressed to raise his voice.
"Hmph!" Maya sniffed and crossed her arms. "I thought you were just talking about the Laundromat, it's where you take everything else you need cleaned. Your fault." She said pointing at him.
"Oh man." Phoenix sighed. Maya patted him on his slouching shoulder.
"Buck up Nick!" She started with a broad smile. "You've got plenty of 'em in your closet anyway." With that, completely guilt free, Maya went into the kitchen.
"B-But, this is the only one that fits right." He whined, clutching his ruined suit in his hands.
Yesterday
Phoenix sat at his desk doing some paperwork, when Maya came rushing through the door. She hastily threw off her jacket and slipped off her sandals.
"Nick!!!" she called dashing from the door to his desk and snatching the pen from his hand.
"M-Maya, what-what are you...?"
"Enough of that for now." She interrupted. "C'mon, on the couch!" Though small, Maya could be quite strong when she wanted to be. She grabbed his arm and dragged him over to the couch before forcing him to sit. Happily, she jumped next to him, grabbed the remote and turned on the t.v.
"What's this about Maya?" Phoenix asked.
"They're running a Pink Princess marathon today and we're watching it!" She replied in no uncertain terms. Phoenix gave a sigh and put his fingers through his spikes.
"Maya, I've got a lot of work to do and you know I don't..." Before he could finish, Maya had already put on her puppy dog face.
"Aww Nick you always watch the Pink Princess with me! Don't tell me you're still mad about yesterday. How many times do I have to apologise?" She looked like she was about to cry.
"A-alright, I'll watch a couple of episodes with you." He caved-in.
"Great!" She chirped. He fell for it again, the puppy dog eyes got him every time.
An hour and a half later, Phoenix was finding himself dozing off. It really was a boring show, how it managed to hold Maya's attention so was an utter mystery. However, just as he was about to drift off, he was rather unpleasantly roused back to full attention.
"Yeah!!" Maya squealed as she tended to do at the end of any episode. She stuck her arms out as if sharing in the Pink Princess's triumph, and clocked him in the face with her elbow.
"Gahhh!" Phoenix grunted, holding his face to his hands.
"Oh God!" Maya gasped. "N-Nick, Nick, I-I'm sorry are you alright?!" She moved his hands out of the way. Blood was dripping from his nose. "Oh man, hold on a sec Nick!" She ran into the bathroom, returning a few seconds later with a box of tissues. "Here." She said holding a handful up to his nose. "Tip your head back."
"N-no dat doezn't work." Phoenix answered, his voice muffled by the tissues. "All dat doz iz make da blood run down your t'roat. Dis is what you're supposed to do." After snatching the tissues from Maya's hand, he pinched the bridge of his nose and leaned forward. "Dere."
"You're eyes starting to swell up too. Stay her I'll get some ice." Maya instructed, dashing into the kitchen. "Stopped yet?" She asked a few minutes later, pressing a bag of ice against his eye.
"No, doezn't look like it's going to eidder." He answered, there were already several blood soaked tissues piled up on the nearby end table. Moving his current tissue away from his nose, Maya could see the blood was still dripping, probably more than when it started. "Maybe I should go to the hospital." He muttered.
"Alright. I'll go call a taxi." Maya said. After the taxi was called, she helped Phoenix with his coat and helped him downstairs, holding the ice to his face all the way.
"You know what Nick?"She asked while they waited for their cab outside.
"What?"
"You're such a wimp."
That Morning
Sleeping with your nose packed with gauze is never easy, added to the fact that they had to wait for an hour just to see the doctor and they never got home until one, it was not a restful night for the superstar attorney. He pulled himself out of bed at seven with a groan. He had to be at court at ten and wanted to look at least halfway presentable. He knew he was going to look quite the state with his ill-fitting suit, a bandage over his nose, and even though the swelling in his eye had gone down, it was now black and bloodshot. After cleaning himself as best he could and dressing, he went out into the office.
"Morning Nick!" Maya chirped in a sing-songy voice from the couch. "Did you manage to get to sleep?"
"Ugh!." Phoenix grunted and went over to his desk. "M-Maya?" He called, his voice trembling.
"Yeah?"
"Where are da papers I had on my desk las night?"
"I threw 'em away."
"WHATTT!" Phoenix screamed. "Maya, I needed dose papers for my case today!!! Oh darn, oh darn!" He muttered making a dash for the door.
"Nick where're you going?" Maya questioned.
"Where you tink? To da dumpster outside to look for dem." He answered over his shoulder before slamming the door. A few moments later he was inside his building's dumpster, desperately clawing and tearing through the bags and filth within, looking for his essential papers. After ten minutes of searching, he was ready to give up.
"Nick!" He heard a voice callout to him. Turning his head, he found Maya's dark eyes looking over the edge of the dumpster at him. "This what you're looking for?" She asked teasingly waving some pieces of paper at him. Phoenix grabbed them and looked them over. They were the right ones alright.
"Maya, where'd..?" He began.
"Man Nick you're dumb." Maya huffed, folding her arms again. "I only said I threw 'em away, they were still in the garbage can in the office. Geez, you ran out so fast I didn't have time to tell you." Phoenix sighed with relief and climbed out of the bin.
"Tank God. Maya, new rule, from now on don't trow away anyting on my desk. Got it?" He said sternly.
"Yeah whatever." Maya replied nonchalantly, and started back for the office. "Oh Nick." She began looking over her shoulder at him.
"What?"
"You stink!" She exclaimed, pinching her nose closed and sticking out her tongue to him. Phoenix let out an exhausted sigh as Maya playfully trotted back inside.
Later That Morning
After a shower and a change of suits (this one never fit properly either) Phoenix took the defense bench along with Maya and his client to begin his case. He was up against Von Karma today; typical.
"Phoenix Wright, what in the world happened to you fool!" Franziska exclaimed with wide eyes as she took the prosecutor's bench.
"Don't ask." He muttered. He could tell that his opponent was doing her best to maintain her decorum and not break out in a fit of laughter. The judge then took his seat.
"Your honour!" Maya piped up. "You think we can get this moving along! Nick's kinda in bad shape today, I think he needs to go to bed."
"Nick?" The as-usual clueless judge asked. "Who'se Nick?"
"HA HA HA HA!" Franziska cackled unable to contain it any longer "I did not know your assistant was also your mother Phoenix Wright." Not even wanting to think of the mortified look that must be on his client's face, Phoenix simply put his forehead to the bench and let out a long groan.
Fifteen Minutes Ago
By some miracle, he managed to win the case, rather quickly too. Most likely because Franziska was laughing so hard it completely threw her off her game. Because they won, Maya insisted that they go out for burgers. Where was all that concern she had before about him needing rest?
"Give me two doubles, a single and a triple." Maya ordered once they had reached the front of the line.
"That's thirty five ninety five." The cashier said after punching the order into the register.
"B-But Maya, dat's all I got on me. I-I won't be able to get anyting." Phoenix stammered.
"Hmph, well that's your fault isn't it Nick? Should of brought more money, you know how much I eat." She smiled. "Well, pay the man." Begrudgingly and with an empty stomach, Phoenix handed over every cent he had to the cashier.
And that's what the last couple of days had been for Phoenix, he had been injured, side-tracked, hospitialised, messed up, and embarrassed beyond belief. All these incidents had one thing in common, Maya Fey.
"Maya." He spoke up as she went to unwrap her third burger.
"Yeah Nick?" She replied, lifting the burger to her mouth.
"I want you to answer a serious question." He began.
"What?" Maya asked after taking a bite.
"Why do I put up with you?"
Maya put her beloved food back on her tray. What may have been an offensive question for some certainly didn't seem to be for Maya, who put her hand to her chin and looked off to the side as if scanning her brain for the answer. After a moment an invisible light bulb went off over her head, she smiled with satisfaction and went back to her burger.
"Well?"
"It's called 'love' Nick." She said with a wink. Phoenix smiled and sighed, bowing his head in defeat.
"Yeah."
END
