Heart breaks. Heart Heals?
Chapter 1
by Dory the Fish
A/N: This is in Kim Heechul's point of view. I hope you'll enjoy reading this ^_^
I have to tell him whether this will hurt him or not, at least it came from me. Here it goes, "I'm seeing Siwon. We are not a couple but he keeps me company." I miss my China Man so bad. I miss him that I can't think straight. I want to do the right thing. The deafening silence sinks in, "Hannie, are you still there?" I asked. "Yes I am still here, Chulie. How can you do this? When I left China to move in with you for work, I was afraid that I might go back to China as soon as I arrived but you made me feel I'm home...with you. We lived in one room for most of our lives in the apartment way before we debuted." He continued, both of us are sobbing "Now that I'm back in China where I thought this is my home since childhood, I felt that I left home because, I left you." I cried harder.
I've been crying for the past 3 months since my Prince Charming left Korea. I thought of the times when we spent our freedays together how we kissed and held each other. "Don't you dare shove to my face that you miss me that much, that this pains you as much as I do? You don't know how hard for me to go on everyday without you." I thought I heard the door squiked until I felt someone squeezed my hand. Now I felt... safe and brave enough to tell him "Do you know who was beside me through all that? It was Siwonnie. All he did is stayed by my side while you're there in China."
"Ugh! I hate you for loving me this much. Mianhe." I hate myself too for loving you this much. He continued, "I know you don't love Siwon as much as you love me." Why does he know me too well? He is right, I don't love Siwon that much but at least he listens to me and keeps sane from the pain inside me. I don't know how I can go through all this if Siwon wasn't there for me for the past few months. "I love you, Hannie. But if you keep seeing other girls there in China, which I will know one way or another, I don't know if this will work." I felt something hard in my throat when I said that to him. I don't want us to end up like this. But if this is the only way for me to move on then let it be. I was about to hangup when I heard, "Chulie~yah! Chulie~yah! My princess, please don't do this to me." "Then think of something to make me stay with you. I want you and you know that. I don't want to hear your empty promises and do something about what you feel." and I put the phone down.
I'm not the type of person who commits in a relationship. My feelings for Hangeng is totally different, he is the exception. I never thought I would fall for someone like this. I didn't expect to be loved by Hannie either. I thought I had a fairytale life, I had good paying job and man who I can call mine. But he just threw everything away when he left me. How could he do this to me? That's what ran through my head and I didn't realize the warmth of Siwon enveloped me. Suddenly tears ran down my perfect skin and I can't stop crying. "Hyung, please stop crying. We know that he needs to go away for his own good. Like he said, he can't work with SMent if they continue to treat him like a slave." I didn't care about the stupid suit, all I want is for my Hannie to be back in my arms. "I know how to make you feel better..." I looked up to him with wondering eyes. What the heck is he...? My thoughts went blank when his lips crashed onto mine. His lips kissed me in familiar sweet way. I don't want to hurt Siwon, my Simba but he keeps on tempting me. Tempting me to love him and hurt him at the same time.
