Prologue

The happy, brave pirate kid hurriedly, and quickly dashingly leaped for the ropes. Or so he would have, had he been awake, but, alas, he was asleep. Luffy slippingly flopped out of the lovingly comfortably floaty dream with which consumed his painfully, strained brain. He was ready to begin the day. He was full of energy and beans and all that good stuff.

Suddenly, a sword smashingly shatteringly crashed through the door. The door swingingly swung wide, and out confidently emerged….

Alvida!

Luffy's most dastardly, bastardly foe. His best nemesis. His worst frenemy.

At least for the moment. (He has a lot of them, actually.)

In his castle, ready for battle, sick of hassle, Luffy grappled for the evil big bad gal, grabbing her plump, juicy, three inch long by six inch wide scruffy protruding chin. A clash of swords shun beneath the light of the overbearing sun pouring in from the castle's skylight, baking the spritely fighting combatants with bright, white light, on their right side. They were so caught up in their clash to the death, their ill-fated fight, that they were distracted from the fact that the Undertaker threw a Hamurai through the Skylight, who quickly plummeted 16 feet to the ground through the announcer's table as the announcers were busy commentating on the match between Luffy and Alvida who were currently contestants in the semi-finals.

Before long a clear winner emerged. Luffy had massively crashingly hung his foe with a low-blow - crushing his foot hard into Alvida's precious nether regions. Weakly wheezing, writhing while whining with wild wrath, Alvida collapsed against the warm wooden walkway of the miniature ship within the castle, within the sunken ruins, within the fishbowl that they were both inside.

It was at that moment that Luffy realised he was still dreaming, and woke up for real.