Well, it's finally happened. After years of resisting and disparaging remarks, I have finally caved and written my own fanfiction. T-T

I admit, I am rather discouraged by the lack of good Teen Titans fanfiction that don't involved pedophilia or appallingly ooc characters. So, please, inform me promptly if any of the Titans seem to be acting extremely out of character (you know, besides the whole "gay" thing). And now, without further a due.

The Obligatory Prologue:

The mother of all storms raged through Jump City. Lightning crashed and whipped through the sky, claws of energy tearing at the clouds. The heavens roared in response, thundering with such ferocity that the mountains themselves began to quake in terror, trees shirked and coward like beaten curs. Rain fell, like the blood of the great beasts that battle above, pouring in torrents so violent the streets soon filled with water, a virtual rapid worthy of the most ferocious wilderness settled into the shivering huddle called Jump City.

Warm and snug in an elegant penthouse suite—nestled far above the city, like a roc's nest, vast and forbidding—was an equally elegant young man and a painfully beautiful woman. The two, twins almost, conversed in low tones before a roaring, crackling fire. Their shadows danced lazily on the large wall behind them. The woman chuckled, a rich, chocolaty sound and slapped the man playfully on the arm. He winked back at her, leaning back into a large, gothic, wing-backed chair with a contented smile. He looked away from the woman, smile drooping slightly as he started pensively into the flames. The woman tilted her head to look at him better, her soft features concerned. She gave soft "hm" of sympathy. The man turned back to her and smiled again. With a dark chuckle he gazed out into the blacked sky. The woman followed his gaze. They both looked out into the storm that seemed to be swallowing the elevated penthouse, both with worry creasing their lovely brows, when a the doors of the "humble" abode opened with such violence, both man and woman jumped and turned to stare at the intruder, relaxing only when they recognized their old companion and good friend.

"Slash! Femslash! Get your asses over here this minute and help me get this blasted door shut!" Shouted the rain soaked figure. The woman shrugged carelessly and waved a dismissing hand, smirking to her companion. Slash gave a heavy sigh and rose slowly. A particularly strong draft of air threatened the merry fire, causing the man to move a bit faster.

Unlike a normal penthouse, with clever elevators, this particular penthouse opened directly to the sky and ground below. There was virtually no way into the home without some ability of flight or levitation. This was really quite an illogical setup as neither Flash nor Femslash had the ability of prolonged flight. They could float from place to place, but flying much above head-height was quite strenuous.

The struggle with the door was strenuous, though there were no casualties to either side. Eventually, the door surrendered with a loud groan and SLAM-CLICK as the door was sucked shut by wind and locked. The only evidence of a storm outside came as a loud thumping every now and then, as if the wind were asking nicely if he could come in and have tea and he was very sorry for troubling them so.

Slash huffed a bit after the brief tussle with the door and cocked an inquisitive eye-brown at his friend.

"So, any reason you too so long, Madness?" He purred silkily. The named Madness turned an enraged glare upon the Slash and stalked over to the previously occupied gothic chair and sat heavily, barely bothering to remove the soaking coat. Slash made a disapproving sound, but followed and sat on the floor next the fireplace, the plush carpet as comfortable as any luxury chair.

"I have located our next target." Madness began abruptly. Femslash sat up a little straighter, attentive and eager. There was a short silence, for dramatic effect perhaps, when Slash snorted softly.

"Well, alright then, who is it?" He growled out, clearly irritated. (Though the floor was really quite comfortable, it was a still a step down from a chair, and any demotion was a disgrace.) Madness studied its nails for a moment, then looked up, first at Slash then to his sister.

"A little group called the Teen Titans." Madness said, almost nonchalantly, its voice a little too eager.

"Oh." Femslash pouted, he lower lip protruding slightly, doing her best to look cute and sexy.

"We're going after minors now?" Slash cut in, mildly incredulous. Madness sighed, long and hard, as if the adults that sat with it were difficult and quite dim children.

"I have noticed than none of the Teenie Titans are in anyway homo- or bisexual. This horrifies me." Madness spoke smoothly. "As such, slash and femslash is horribly lacking for the Titans fan-base." Madness turned it's empty, fathomless, soulless eyes on the two siblings. "You are to find the Titans, infiltrate their establishment—unnoticed, Fem—and cause complete, beautiful chaos. After all, noting is worse than hormonal, sexually confused teenagers." With that, it fell silent, quietly contemplating the fire.

Femslash pursed her lips and stood stiffly. She began to walk toward the door, pausing briefly to gesture towards her brother, who slowly got to his feet.

"Why do we like that thing again?"