This is my first fic so please people take pity on a newbie!

Warning: This story contains cutting, so if you don't like or under 18 turn around don't read.

Disclaimer: This is a Kagome and Inuyasha fic. I sadly do not own Inuyasha and company.

Little info: Naraku is dead, but they are still searching for the Jewel shards. Set about 3.5 years from beginning of series.

Kagome sat at the base of the Goshinboku under the warm spring evening as the tree always seemed to give her a sense of peace easing her pain. "Ah, I wonder what Inuyasha is doing?" she wondered sadly. She had seen Kikiyo's soul collectors once again, so she figured he had gone to see Kikiyo again. She could always tell when he had seen Kikiyo, as for a couple of days afterword he could not look her in the eyes barely speaking to her. Lately, she didn't want to know they were together, didn't want to know what it was that Kikiyo was doing with Inuyasha. Sometimes she thought life would be easier if Kikiyo had simply died in the battle with Naraku, but afterword she always felt like a truly horrible person to have even thought like that. After thinking of such things or lately anytime Inuyasha disappeared when she had seen soul collectors, thinking Inuyasha went to see Kikiyo, Kagome always entertained thoughts of dying just so she wouldn't have to deal with the overwhelming pain whenever Inuyasha disappeared. But she could never work up the courage to end it all, knowing she was just a coward and good-for-nothing like Inuyasha kept telling her she was always comparing her skills to Kikiyo's no matter the fact that she hadn't missed a target in months. So lately she had found another way to release all the pain. It was a good thing they had so many battles all the time and she fell of her bike so much wearing her school outfit or Inuyasha might guess why she always had the smell of blood on her. Whenever she felt overwhelmed or just simply so numb she couldn't stand it any longer, whether they were camping under the stars or at Kaede's was wait until everyone was settled, then sneak off into the woods acting like she went to relieve herself keeping her weapons on her so as not to make Inuyasha suspicious when he wasn't sleeping. She always kept a pocket knife on her now for when she had to defend herself or use it for cooking, but lately she had found a better use for it. This time was too much, even the Goshinboku couldn't seem to ease her pain or the emptiness she felt. Lately, it seemed as though Inuyasha had been going to see Kikiyo more often. Although Miroku and Sango had noticed how depressed Kagome seemed, but anytime she caught them looking she would put on a smile and ask them what was wrong. In turn they would ask what was bothering her and all they would get is an answer of "Just studies." But what Kagome didn't know is that, though Inuyasha went to Kikiyo sometimes, it was not to even see her or spend time with her, but to tell her to leave. That he didn't want to see her anymore, she didn't belong in the living world anymore. But Kagome had had too much this time they had come back to Kaede's to rest and restock after a gruesome battle and burying yet another village. Kagome had noticed Kikiyo's soul collectors near the river, so Kagome had decided to go to the Goshinboku after she saw Inuyasha leave, hoping the tree would help ease her heart. What she didn't know was that Miroku and Sango had talked to Inuyasha after noticing that every time Inuyasha left, she had left about five minutes later, usually in the opposite direction that Inuyasha had gone. So, what she didn't know was that Inuyasha had deliberately left not going more than a few feet away to see where she went. "Not again," she thought as she saw Inuyasha leap and head towards the river. "Miroku, Sango, I going to take a walk, I need some air." Kagome said as she got up and headed toward the sacred tree. "Where could she be going looking so sad?" Inuyasha thought as he followed silently behind Kagome. Kagome coming to the sacred tree sat at its base and took the pocket knife out. Caressing the blade's sheath, she looked around quickly checking to make sure that no one was around. Upset enough to forget spreading her aura, as she figured that Inuyasha's presence would be down by the river, she failed to notice that he was in the tree above her. "At least, they can listen to me." Kagome said. Waiting a few minutes as the Goshinboku's presence failed to calm the storm in her heart, she flipped the knife open and pulled her left sleeve up. "She's not going to do what I think she's going to is she?" Inuyasha thought. Inuyasha stared down at Kagome, paralyzed in horror as he watched Kagome take the knife and slid it down her smooth pale arm that he could see where she was covered in scars similar to the cut that marred her skin. As she went to make a second cut, Inuyasha jumped down and took the knife from Kagome. "What do you think you are doing? You idiot!" Inuyasha shouted as he took the knife and threw it. Grasping her arm, he held her still, running his tongue across the cut allowing his healing saliva to bind Kagome's wound. "W-w-what are you doing h-h-here?" Kagome stuttered as she watched him bind her wound. "Miroku and Sango were worried when you left, so when I came back, and you weren't there, I came to check on you. What did you cut yourself for? Were you poisoned?" Inuyasha asked confused. "No. I wasn't." Kagome whispered as she hid her face using her hair. "Then why, why did you cut yourself, Kagome?" Inuyasha pleaded. "Please tell me, Wench know you can tell me anything right?" Inuyasha pulled her face up to face him gently. "Please tell me these scars are from the battles, not yourself, please, Kagome, please." he begged. "It's just as you say, they are from the battles." Kagome said turning away from him. 'Somehow, I don't think these injuries are from battles they look to be too clean of a cut.' Inuyasha thought, not wanting to upset her further, he figured he could get her to talk when she was ready. "Let's go back, Inuyasha. I'm tired. Please don't tell anybody, I don't want to worry them. I promise I won't do it again, Ok." "Alright, Kagome, I won't." Inuyasha said as he carried her back to Kaede's hut.

Please Reveiw and sorry about mistakes.