TITLE: Breathe
AUTHOR: Jen Isaks
DATE: May 2005
FANDOM: CSI
PAIRING: Gil/Nick
CATEGORY: Slash
RATING: PG-13
WARNINGS: non
STATUS: finished
ARCHIVE: ask please
FEEDBACK: yes, thank you grissoms_
SERIES/SEQUEL: not planed at this time.
OTHER WEBSITES: .com
DISCLAIMERS: Don't own them just like to play with them
SPOILER: Eleven Angry Jurors 4:11
BETA: Illgetmerope Thank you for a very quick beta I really appreciate it.
SUMMERAY: Nick thinks he has to apologize.
NOTES: MY VERY FIRST CSI FIC, be gentle… I saw a scene in ep 4.11 and this is what came to mind. And then there were this lovely manip posted on Gil & Nick Screencap Fix ;) Ah yummy…. /albums/y14/laurelgardner/?action=view¤t= .com/community/gilnick_#cutid1
Breathe by JenIsaks
Nick explained his findings in the reopened Rita Westonson murder case, all the while Grissom busied himself multitasking with his back to Nick.
"Unleaded gasoline, barrels for incineration, cast off on the walls, DNA consistent with Rita Westonson… Fay killed Rita to be with Aaron, and a couple of weeks ago Fay heard he's getting engaged to her younger sister Terry. Fay couldn't handle it, man. She just freaked. So she tried to pin Rita's murder on Aaron."
"Four years ago I decided to close the case, did you agree with my decision?" Grissom stood with his back to Nick as he waited for a response.
"Well, you were following protocol."
"And, now?"
"Now I'd fight you on it, yeah."
"Why?" Grissom asked.
"Rita Westonson was a dependable predictable girl. We never answered the question why she just woke up one morning and walked away from the rest of her life."
"It happens. And that's what the evidence was telling us."
"Well, that's what the physical evidence told us. We should have dug deeper. You can't just ignore the human element, Grissom."
"I agree, Nick. But when you start to have feelings for the people involved you risk your objectivity."
"So, what? You know, I'm always getting criticized for empathizing with the victims and their families, but that's who I am. That's how I do my job. And as far as the promotion goes, it's all good, man. I can live without it. I'm not you…"
Grissom finally turned facing Nick and took his place behind his desk.
"Good. We certainly don't need another me around here." Grissom replied looking Nick straight in the eye. His facial expression neutral.
Not really able to decipher Grissom's expression Nick grinned nervously, turned, and left Grissom's office.
* * * * *
Later…
Nick was waiting by Grissom's car, lost in his own thoughts. He didn't notice that his boss was approaching. The echo on the payment made him look up, only to lower his head and nervously study his shoes.
"Hey, I thought you clocked out an hour ago?"
"Yeah, well I wanted to talk to you." Nick replied, still watching his shoes.
"Why didn't you come into my office?"
A slight pink flush spread from Nick's chest to his face – he could feel his ears heating up. "Well I… It doesn't really matter." Embarrassed he moved to walk away, only to have Grissom stop him with a hand on his arm.
"If you waited here for an hour just to talk to me… It matters, Nick… I'm not going to bite you, you know." Gil said softly, emphasizing with a small squeeze to the arm he was still holding.
"I ah… I just wanted to apologize …" Grissom looked at him expectantly, "…about before in your office… I didn't realize how it sounded till after. I'm sorry. I didn't mean any disrespect."
Grissom frowned, "Excuse me, I'm a little confused here… what exactly do you think you need to apologize for?"
"I didn't mean to make it sound like you're cold or heartless… You just think different that's all. I'm sorry."
"It's all right Nicky, I wasn't offended…I was rather glad actually."
"What!?" Nick looked up for the first time, eyes wide with shock.
"Well, I'm proud of you…"
"Huh!" A dumbfounded Nick stared at him and Gil smiled.
"You finally stopped trying so hard to impress me: you're doing things your way, not trying to emulate me or to get my acceptance. You already had that all along. Now you work the evidence and follow where it takes you – I really am proud of you."
"Wow."
"Yes, in fact I think you're ready for the next level."
"So what… shouldn't I get a reward or something?" Nick said teasingly.
"Do you want one?"
"What would you give me?" Nick grinned.
"I was going to say a medal… but … you look like you might want something more personal." Amusement in Grissom's eyes, a slight draw of his lips repressing a smirk as he saw Nick flush pink. "I guess we're back to what you want, Nicky… So what do you want from me?" He asked in a low, soft voice. "What is the human element telling you, Nick?"
Nick was breathing very short, hurried breaths, stunned by Grissom's actions.
"Nick, take a deep breath or you're going to hyperventilate." Gil's hold got firmer. Nick looked up and noticed that they were standing very close.
"Oh Nicky…It's all right, really."
The flushed CSI just shook his head, and leaned into the hold that turned into an embrace. He found his face pressed into the crook of Gil's neck, his breath hitched, the smell of Gil's aftershave intoxicating. Gil's gentle kiss in his hair let the last threads of tension seep out of his body, they escaped in a sigh.
"What do I have to do to get you to breathe, Nicky?" Gil asked softly.
"Kiss me." Nick whispered.
And he did.
Nick's head was swimming, but it was okay, really. Gil was breathing for him.
THE END
