WARNING! IF YOU HAVE NOT READ CHAPTER 515, DON'T EVEN BOTHER READING THIS UNTIL YOU DO SO! OTHERWISE YOU'LL BE ALL WTF?
Note: I don't own ShonenJump or any of it's franchises.
Anyway, chapter 515 was so mindblowing, I decided to make a spoof! Hope you enjoy!
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The Tseuchikage flys through the air with the giant island-sized turtle on his hand.
" No way Akatsuki will find it now right?" Akatsuchi asked.
" Actually, I'm really flying him away to hide from the creators of the Neverending story so they can't sue Kishi-san for stealing their idea." Tseuchikage said.
" Rawwwwrr! Too late!" Valcore said flying beside them with Atreyu on his back.
There was a silence until Tseuchikage popped Valcore in the nose sending him hurtling to the ground.
Inside the Island Tortise..
" Naruto learn to stack the blocks with your chakra.." Bee said.
" Stacking blocks? What are you 2? I'm gonna go check and make sure that aramadillo still has a dick." Naruto said.
By the Shinobi alliance...
Thousands of Shinobi from the numerous villages stood in attention before the generals.
Ambush squad.
" I am Kankuro of the Sand village, I will be in charge of this squad."
" I see, what kind of nickname should we give you?" Sai asked.
" Oh Sai, I'm Omoi, we'll become best friends because both our personalities piss off everyone around us." Omoi said.
Mid-close range fighter squad.
" Gai-sensei what's wrong?" Lee asked as he aided his fallen sensei.
" What happened to him?" Sakura said.
" Ka-Kakashi is my general...I have to acknowledge him as my superior...gahhhh..." Gai said.
Lee and Sakura both have a sweatdrop come down their heads.
Close range fighter squad.
" I-I'm abit nervous." Hinata said.
Karui looked to her. " Really? You haven't had a line for like a year since you told Naruto you love him, and that's what you come out with?"
Moments later...
" Listen up people!" Gaara said. " I Gaara of the desert, who up to a few years ago only cared about himself, am the general of this army and have been placed with the responsibility with your lives. Forget that Hatake Kakashi has at least 15 years of combat experience over me and is a master strategist. As the internet claims, I am qualified to be the general because I am just that badass."
The shinobi all looked to eachother and nodded in agreement.
" That being said, if for some odd reason in combat you encounter someone you might know, please pleeeaase keep the flashbacks to an absolute minimum." Gaara said. " We're still in manga form, there will be plenty of time for flashbacks in the anime."
Gaara looked down at Neji. " I'll explain a scenario, suppose you Hyuuga Neji encountered I don't know, your resurrected father. I suppose he'll ask you did you forge your own destiny like he had hoped, I hope you say yes, then you have a little banter as you reluctantly fight him teary-eyed."
" Like that would ever happen." Neji said.
" I know, that would be like me encountering my resurrected father. It's just not going to happen. But in any case, keep it to talk, use the flashbacks sparingly."
" Yes sir!" The shinobi said in unison.
In Madara's Hideout...
" First up..." Kabuto said. " The former members of Akatsuki."
The corpses of Kakuzu, Deidara, Sasori, Nagato and Itachi stepped forward.
" Next is the former Jinchuuriki."
The former Jinchuuriki stepped forward.
" Then the previous Kage."
Kages of the past stepped forward.
" Annnd..." Kabuto said. " Deceased ninja who were once famous in their own right."
Zabuza, Haku, Hizashi, Dan, Asuma, Kimimmarro and various other ninja of the past stepped forward.
" Excellent Kabuto..." Madara said.
" Oh, we are far from done." Kabuto said.
" Next is Uzumaki's mentor Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage as well."
Jiraiya and The 3rd stepped forward.
" Ooooo, that should make Naruto mad." Madara said.
" Hah! That's nothing, you wanna see what will make him mad?"
Suddenly, Namikaze Minato and Uzumaki Kushina stepped forward.
" Kabuto...you're too evil for words." Madara teased.
" It's not over." Kabuto said. " Next is Hyuuga Hinata's mother. That should piss her off right good."
" Well..uh..actually, I'm not even a hundred percent sure she's even dead, and neither do the viewers." Madara questioned.
" Silence, I have alot to get through." Kabuto said.
" Wait, there's more?" Madara said.
" Yes, next up is Rokusho Aoi!"
" Oh...soooo we're bringing back people from fillers now?" Madara asked a sweatdrop came down his head.
" More! There's More!" Kabuto shouted. " Next is Arrancar 0-9!"
The Arrancar stepped forward.
" Hey Wait a minute! They're not even from this series!" Madara pointed at them with his fist shaking.
Kabuto ignored him.
" Yagami Light!" Kabuto yelled.
Light stepped forward with the deathnote.
" Kabuto, this is getting out of hand!" Madara yelled.
" You wanted an army? I'll give you a f###ing army!" Kabuto said maniacally.
" No, this is good!" Madara said.
" Nonsense! By the time I'm done, the battles on DragonBall Z will look like nothing!" Kabuto snapped his fingers. " Which reminds me!"
" Oh God..." Madara said.
The covers drop down from the coffins of Raditz, Nappa, Broly, Freiza, Cell, and Majin Buu.
" Is there even any point arguing with you?" Madara slumped over.
" Next is..."
" Kabuto-senpai..." A blindfolded Sasuke stumbled in. " Can you...can you bring back my clan?" He asked.
There was a still silence in the room.
Madara came and slapped Sasuke upside the head. " Sasuke I said keep your ass in your room with Zetsu!"
" Ok..." Sasuke said in a scolded manner as he walked away he fell down a flight of stairs due to the fact that he can't see. This prompted everyone to laugh hysterically.
"Hey Sasuke!Emo says what?" Madara called down.
" What?" Sasuke said prompting everyone to once again laugh.
" Now where were we? Oh yeah..." Kabuto continued.
After about an hour, the army was finally complete.
" Alright! The war begins now!" Madara said as he and Kabuto setout the opening of the cave, the resurrected warriors followed in suit. That was when a huge problem occurred as they all tried to leave at the same time.
" Hey! Quit pushing!" Minato yelled at Yugito.
" You're the one pushing, I'm just standing here!" Yugito countered.
" Don't talk that way to my husband!" Kushina yelled.
" That's my foot you bastard!" The Sandaime told Kakuzu.
" Hey Lemme through!"
" Get off me!"
" I'm not touching you, I'm not touching you..."
" Wanna fight?"
Shouts were echoing through the cave.
" People People, there's plenty of room for all of you to exit..."
"SHUT UP!" The entire crowd told Madara, shocking him.
The fight ensued and suddenly, the biggest brawl in anime history was taking place in a small cave.
" Oh crap, in heindsight, maybe we shouldn't have done this in such a small area." Kabuto said.
Moments later, a large mushroom cloud erupted from the hideout.
Kabuto and Madara stood there cinged classic cartoon style.
Kabuto turned to Madara about to speak. Madara held up his finger. " Don't...just...don't.
The End
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