Mello POV:
How could this happen to me?
What did I ever do to deserve what just happened?
I've done so many bad things in my life yet I don't think any of them could ever make me deserve this; having to sit here by my best friends side as he fights for his life thanks to something I did.
It's completely my fault Matty, please try and forgive me.
Carefully I press the towel over my lovers bleeding chest and push down heavily. There are just too many wounds here. I don't know if I can even take out half of these bullets before he passes away…
I take back all those times I was working on the kira case and was to busy to greet him when he walked in the door. Now he is lying on the cold lounge room floor bleeding to death for me kira doesn't matter anymore.
The blood is seeping through the cloth now and his breathing is only slight. I want to tell him to hold on. I want to tell him that I'm going to make it better. I want to, but it would be a lie.
If only I could go back id tell him every day that I loved him. I'd tell him every day that I appreciate everything he has done for me. He has stuck by me through everything, all the good times and all the bad. My Matty has always been by my side no matter how hard things got.
I can feel his life draining. His blood stained cheeks becoming a deathly grey and the slight shaking of his pained body slowly stopping.
He would be angry if he was conscious you know? Not about being shot but about the state I left his car in… He rarely gets upset or mad about anything but he loved that god damn car. If he could he would be screaming and yelling, fighting me to get back to his beloved vehicle with everything he had! I can almost hear it: 'Mells! We have to go back! She's hurt Mells! Don't leave her there!' and then it would have been, 'Mello you ass hole we have to go back for her!' It wouldn't matter how many times I told him it was just a car he would cry and kick and scream until I went back for it.
A sad little smile creeps onto my face. I wish I could hear him screaming at me about his car… I think id just sit there and smile…
I lean down and pull off the redheads goggles slowly so I can lean down and kiss his forehead. If I could I would go back and do this every night when he had fallen asleep waiting for me to come to bed. No, if I could I would go back and never keep him waiting for me again…
A sad little sob and my first tears escape when his chest sinks and refuses to raise again, my hand still trying to stop the bleeding feels his last breath.
Why couldn't he have died right away? Why did he have to suffer for what is now over twenty minuets since being littered with bullets? Was he waiting for me? Did he want to say goodbye? By the time I got there he was already unconscious but I am sure that's why he held on…
Softly I kiss him again, his cold lips this time. Can you feel that Matty? Do you know how much I love you?
Slowly his tired heart comes to a stop, my lips still on his. I grip his shirt tightly. My body starts shaking with grief.
I did love you Matty. Please forgive me.
