Disclaimer: I do not own VA or any of the characters. Richelle Mead does. (:
This is my first fanfic - please leave reviews so I can improve!

Love fades. Mine has.

I've only been imprisoned in this jail cell for about three days. After a while, you begin to lose track of time. It nearly feels as if my mind has been racing with thoughts, but those few words where the only thing I could truly focus on - despite recent events with the Queen.
How could Dimitri just abandon me like that? How could he just cut my feelings out? What about his feelings? I tried everything I could to save him, and the best he could repay me was to ignore me. And he was so, so good at it, too. I was always under the impression me and Dimitri just understood each other. Not now. He didn't understand I needed him. . . how I lov-

No. I deserved this. I failed him, over and over again. I should have killed him when I got the chance, to save him from this depressing state of mind. Even then, I failed him by ignoring his first lesson. Don't hesitate. Dimitri was right; he would be better without me. I only caused him pain. Physical and emotional.

"Rose,"

His voice almost pierced the room. How long have I just been curled up in my bed?

"Go away, Abe. I told you I don't want visitors." I refused to look at my father, rolling over to face the wall. I've stared at so long, I named all the dents in it from previous jailmates. Jae, Nitro, Dillard, on and on they went.

"That's a complete lie and you know it. Mikhail told me about your sleep-talking," Zmey, trying to bargain me to talk to them. "You're dying to see them."

"Quite literally," coughed one of the Guardians. "She's been refusing to eat anything." I couldn't make out his face, but his voice sound familiar. So, so familiar.

"Please, Roza. Don't make this harder than it has to be."

My heart completely stopped. As much as I longed for Dimitri; his voice, his aftershave, his smile. . . . No! I couldn't do that to him. I couldn't do that to me!

I tried to muster up as much anger as I could, hoping it would make me sound more forceful. Even though I knew it would fail, I prayed it would work. Dimitri shouldn't be here. I don't want him to be here.

"Go. Away."

"Rose, atleast look at us." Lissa is here, too? What is this? Some kind of going away party for me? Well, newsflash: I'm not in the mood for partying.

I crawled out of the sheets, and pushed myself upward. My arms where shaking, I'd lost all my strength. Not only was I broken on the inside, I was broken on the outside, too. Looking up, I saw all of them staring directly at me. The guardians tensed as I moved, but they knew too well I wasn't going anywhere.

"You're lying." Abe was making eye contact with me. I wanted to put the fear of God in him.

"No, Rose. You're simply lying to yourself." Smiling slyly, I knew my act was no good. Dimitri could see right through me. And Lissa, well, she couldn't see at all. Too many tears covering her vision.

My eyes trailed back to the floor, this hurt to much. Looking at them hurt too much. "I never asked for them," I whispered gently.
My anger had dimmed down, bt the aching in my chest was growing rapid. Right now, I wished Dimitri would say something. Maybe one of his Zen lessons, something that would bring back good memories. But they always say be careful what you wish for - and I should have, because I regret ever thinking that after what he said next.

"Maybe not conciously, but your heart did."

I could feel the anger flaring in my heart again, it was starting to burn in my throat. " And what do you know about heart? Have you even listened to your own heart lately? Because last time I checked. . ."

You're going to far, Rose. You're just going to hurt him.

Somehow, that voice always knew the perfect timing for a good guilt trip. This time, I had something to say to that voice in my head. I'm tired of holding my breath for him. It's important for Dimitri to know how much he hurt me.

"Because last time I checked. . . your heart told you to avoid me. You wanted nothing to do with me."

Love fades. Mine has.

Dimitri faltered. His Mask was finally broken. My eyes were blurred and stung, but I could see tears welling up in his eyes as well.
"I'm just doing exactly what you wanted, comrade." The words stung my tongue as the rolled right off it.

It took a while for him to respond. I'd broken down his wall, something he probably wasn't expecting. "I've had a chance of heart since then." Dimitri stared right back at me, with his Guardian Mask back on as soon as it came off. Although something in his eye changed . . . was it really love for me? Passion? Determination to fix this? To protect me? At one point, he said he'd do anything to protect me.

"So have I," I snapped back. No way was I going to let him see that I was yearning for him. Because as much as my head said no, my heart was burning in desire with every peek I got of him.

"On what?" Lissa choked out. I almost forgot she was standing there. She's been awfully quiet.

"Everything."

Through the bond, I could feel Lissa had broken inside. Normally, I'd always been her savior, her guardian. Lately she's been protecting herself, and I just faded to the background. Not now. She needed me. More than ever.

That damn Guardian coughed again. Was he sick? Every one turned their attention to him, and he stood sheepishly against the wall. "Sorry for interrupting, but Princess Dragomir, , and Mr. Mazur, visitation is now over. Time to go." I remembered why his voice was so familiar. It was Cole, the poor boy who'd seen me suffer in here for three days.

I shot one last glance at Lissa.

"I won't be visiting anytime soon." She knew exactly what I meant by that. "I hope you respect my wishes to do the same." I rolled back into my position on the bed, now cold. I counted their footsteps as they walked away; each with a different stepping pattern. I could almost make out who's was who's, but Lissa's crying was blocking my full hearing.

Wait. She wasn't the only one crying.

Dimitri.

He was crying for. . . me.