A/N: This story is AU, set 16 years after Voyager was stranded in the Delta Quadrant. Idea from an X-files episode with the same name and similar style (bonus points to readers who find the subtle homage). Thanks to SunInHerSmile for the Fitzgerald quotes and her kind words.
April 26, 2387
0755 hours
Captains Log, Stardate 63315.1
We entered orbit around Eskao late last night and the citizens have been just as happy to welcome us as their scout ship implied that they would be. After more than eight months without a break, most of that time battling our way through hostile territory, the crew has more than earned a week of shore leave. The first wave beamed down an hour ago and another will be departing shortly.
I expect that Commander Chakotay will burst into my ready room at any moment to all but force me to take leave myself. But for now, I'm happy just to see some blue and green outside my window. Today marks the beginning of the sixteenth year of our journey. I'm hoping with this respite as distraction not too many of the others will notice.
We are expecting communications from Pathfinder later this afternoon, I intend to stay on board to receive them and respond. It will be nice to touch base with home, on this day especially.
There's my first officer. Right on time.
Computer, end log.
"Come in."
Captain Janeway's ready room doors swished open to allow a smiling Commander Chakotay to enter. "Good morning Captain. Lovely day for shore leave, don't you agree?"
0925 Hours
"I think…no. I'm going to throw up."
"Well, if you must please don't do it on the floor," the doctor chided teasingly. "I just had the carpets replaced." His otherwise jovial attitude quickly changed as Ensign Tal Celes continued to turn a pale shade of green before his very eyes. "Ah…ahem. Yes, of course," he replied. "Come right over here then."
The ensign made it about three steps before vomiting up the contents of her very small breakfast all over his holographic boots. A sickening, splattering sound echoed in the empty infirmary.
"I….I'm so sorry," she apologized, one hand over her mouth.
"No need to apologize. Sickbay is equipped for this kind of thing," he took her arm and guided her gently to sit on a bed. Then he activated the computerized bio-hazard cleaning protocol and the mess vanished.
The doctor reached for a medical tricorder. "How long have you been feeling this way? Any other symptoms?" He asked, running the device up and down in front of her.
"Two days," she said. "I thought it was those eggs Neelix served but….oh. Prophets. Eggs." The ensign felt her stomach start to churn again but the cool hiss of a well-timed hypospray quickly alleviated her discomfort. "Thank you," she whispered with her head in her hands.
The doctor walked over to his replicator unit. "Computer, one cool compress and one cup of water." The items materialized and he took them to her. He laid the compress gently around her neck.
"What's wrong with me?" she asked, looking up at him. She eyed the cup of water warily as if it might hurt her.
"There's nothing wrong with you Ensign," the doctor replied. He put his hand on her shoulder. "You're in perfect health. And so is your baby."
1013 hours
"Is this what I think it is?"
"It's called 'tam-jenk'" the middle-aged farmer replied. "Roughly translated it means 'bitter dirt-chunk.'"
Commander Chakotay looked at Neelix with a skeptically humored expression as the Talaxian continued examining the gardener's produce. They were in the city's common area where a farmers market had been erected. It was available one day out of every five and was touted as the best place to find fresh and unique food items. So far, the market was living up to its full potential. They had already bartered and traded for enough fresh and canned food to fill a cargo bay. And, the seeds that Ensign Bronowski was in the process of procuring would ensure those food sources for years to come.
"Does tam-jenk grow naturally here?" Neelix asked as the man handed him a slice of the hard, white root to sample.
"It does now, but not indigenously. It was brought to our people generations ago by way of another trader from across the galaxy. Most of our wide variety of produce has been acquired in similar ways."
Neelix's smile grew as he turned to Chakotay and smiled. He carefully nibbled at the sample and closed his eyes in happiness at the familiar flavor. "I have to admit, it's not one of my best sellers," the farmer confessed. "The older generation still use it for tonics and such. They believe it to have supernatural properties."
The Talaxian looked to his left. "See that Commander, supernatural properties."
"It certainly would make up for the taste," he chided softly.
The gardener piped in. "I have to agree with you there sir, It doesn't lend itself to the most delectable of recipes. Still, I have much of it to offer at a low price."
"Well?" Chakotay asked to Neelix, already knowing the answer.
"We'll take five bushels," Neelix replied with a large grin. "We ran out of our supply almost eight years ago."
Chakotay handed the farmer an electronic payment device he had been using to make the trades. "I can't believe I'm authorizing this Neelix," he commented as the man put his thumbprint on the display.
"Consider it a personal favor Commander. The captain will be so pleased."
Chakotay laughed, "Oh, I'm sure everyone will be. Just be sure to take all of the credit yourself."
Neelix held a large section of the dirty vegetable with both hands.
"Leola root. How we've all missed you."
1121 hours
"I believe, Captain, the time has finally come."
Janeway sighed audibly and sat herself in a chair opposite of Tuvok in his dimly lit quarters. A candle flickered on the table in front of them both.
"You're sure?" she asked hesitantly.
"Unfortunately, yes. As my condition has continued to deteriorate I am finding it…" Tuvok paused and blinked hard before finishing his thought. "Difficult. To focus on even simple tasks takes more concentration than I am able to impart," he admitted. Janeway remained silent, waiting patiently for him to continue. She would be lying if she said she hadn't noticed a marked decline in his behavior and overall well-being in the last few weeks. But she wondered what had caused her friend to admit that now was the time.
"This morning, I had prob problems working the replicator," he admitted with a slight stutter that she had come to accept as his new normal. "And yesterday, I felt anger that was almost impossible to control toward a, a crewman who merely bumped into me in the turbolift. I believe that to continue to have me as your top security advisor and tactical officer would be to place Voyager in dane danger. I am not willing be the source of such risk any further."
Janeway sighed. "I understand. Thank you for being honest with me, and for working through this as long as you could," she paused and eyed the demeanor of her still-proud friend. She wondered just how much effort it was taking him to keep up the illusion of normalcy. "Has the doctor made any more progress?"
"The doctor believes that he is close to a treatment regimen that should allow my condition to stabilize long enough for us to return to the Alpha Quadrant. I remain hopeful in his work, however, I do not expect a reversal that would allow me to return to, to duty."
"What will you do now?" She asked, palms open to him. "What can I help you with?"
"I would like to continue on as an instructor and mentor to Naomi and Icheb. Miral Paris is also showing great promise and could benefit from my guidance."
Janeway smiled. "I think that would be good for all of you. Naomi is due to hear back from the Academy soon. She'll need assistance with her studies. I'm sure you will be very helpful to her."
"For as long as I am able, Captain."
1335 hours
"Eighteen months?"
Seven of Nine nodded to her colleague. "That is correct," she replied as a long range display filled the main screen in Astrometrics.
"Wow," Jenny Delany sighed wistfully, leaning her elbows on the console. Her eyes took in the plot Seven had brought back with her from the Center for Astronomical Research. The picture across the screen showed a colorful representation of a tunnel-shaped anomaly.
"If the wormhole is stable, as the Eskao scientists claim, passing through it will reduce our journey by approximately five-hundred and forty days. It will, however, mean travelling roughly four weeks out of our way."
"But it's so worth it," Jenny exclaimed. "This is fantastic Seven, do you know what this means?"
"That we are eighteen months closer to our destination," she restated.
"It means that Megan and I will make it home for our fiftieth birthday!"
Seven raised an eyebrow at the Ensign. "And that is significant?"
"When this trip started, my sister and I never thought we would get home in our lifetime, let alone before we turned fifty. We thought we'd never see our parents again, our aunt and our uncles... Every little shortcut like this is significant."
Seven noticed her colleague's eyes begin to tear up.
"This is good, Seven. This is really, really good."
1507 hours
"Can I ask you for some advice?"
Ensign Wildman nodded kindly at the pale, younger woman who stood before her in the entryway to her quarters.
"Of course, come in," she said.
"I'm sorry to bother you, you're probably getting ready to go down to the planet," Ensign Celes said quickly.
"Not at all, Naomi and I just got back actually."
"Oh, good."
Samantha eyed the ensign cautiously. She knew Celes in passing, but hadn't spent a considerable amount of time with her.
Samantha's guest took a seat at the dining table and nervously folded her hands in front of her, her thumbs fidgeting.
"I….um. I guess I want to ask. What is it like? Being a single parent?"
The question took Samantha aback. There was only one reason someone would ask her this and so she took a deep breath and gathered her thoughts. It had been so long since Naomi was born, being a single mother of sorts, was normal to her. But she remembered all too well her fears, her heartbreak, her guilt at being the only present parent to the life growing inside of her.
"It's not easy," she admitted. "But as my grandmother would say, nothing worth doing ever is."
Celes looked to her. "I'm not the most confident person," she admitted. "But I want to do this right."
Samantha nodded.
"Billy and I….we weren't in love. It wasn't like that. We were friends. But all this time, being alone. We just wanted…."
"You don't have to explain yourself to me," Samantha offered. "Or to anyone, you know that."
Celes shrugged. "If he were here it would be different. Maybe we'd try to make a go of things." She could feel the tears starting to burn behind her eyes. Samantha waited patiently. "What am I going to tell this child?" She asked, looking up to the woman. "I wasn't in love with your father and then he left before you were born?"
"He didn't leave you Tal," Samantha imparted. "He died. There's a big difference."
"Doesn't feel like it."
Samantha sighed. "I know you might not see this now. But you can do this. And you're far from alone. That baby of yours will be loved just as much as mine has been. By every single member of this family. And when we get home, which won't be too much longer now, he will know your real family too."
"That's all well and good," Celes admitted. "But it's not a substitute for a father."
Samantha had to agree. "No. It's not, and in the middle of the night when that baby is screaming and you have to get up early to go on duty the next morning it will be the hardest thing you've ever done." Samantha reached out and clasped the pale woman's hands. "But someday, that baby is going to grow up just a little and give you the tightest hug and tell you that they love you. And that, will make it all worth it."
1620 hours
"I can't look. You do it for me."
Icheb regarded Naomi Wildman with confusion. "I do not understand why you are asking me to review a communique that you have been anticipating for over two months," he said as she thrusted the PADD into his chest and averted her eyes.
"Just read it, to yourself," she told him. "And then break the news to me slowly. Please."
Icheb sighed. "I will never understand the human tendency to delay the arrival of important news. The decision has been made whether you are aware of it or not. Would it not be quicker to relieve yourself of the tension by…."
"Read it!" Naomi shouted, interrupting him.
"As you wish."
Naomi had her hands clamped tight over her eyes and she peeked out through her fingers, much like she had as a child when Neelix would tell her scary stories. But she wasn't a child anymore. She was fifteen years old, which was more like eighteen by human standards given her Ktarian paternity. And this was possibly the most important letter of her life.
Icheb's face displayed no emotion. That was the problem with ex-borg drones, Naomi thought, they were so very hard to read. She watched nervously as his eyes scanned the PADD. Then he looked up at her and raised an eyebrow.
"Well?!" she asked again, bouncing slightly up and down.
"Had you read this yourself, you would already know…." He trailed off. At this point her eyes were practically burning a hole through his skin. "That the Captain's proposal was accepted. And so were you."
She stopped moving and stared at him in disbelief. "I passed?"
"You passed," Icheb confirmed. "Congratulations, Cadet."
1808 hours
"Welcome back sirs."
Tom, B'Elanna, Miral and little Michael materialized in Transporter Room two and greeted a smiling Ensign Culhane.
Miral took her brother's hand and bounded off the pad with their mother chasing quickly behind them. "Hey you two, we're back on the ship now. Slow down!" B'Elanna shouted. Tom watched as she ran out of the room to subdue them.
Tom turned to the transporter operator and shrugged. "Kids."
"Neelix asked me to deliver these as the crew came back onboard," the ensign said, handing a PADD to Tom. Tom took it and slapped it on his palm.
"Gotta love mail day," he smiled. The kids so looked forward to receiving notes and pictures from their grandparents and despite the fact that they had never been able to meet in person, this made everyone seem just a little bit closer. A little bit more like real family.
"You get a chance to go down yet?" Tom asked the ensign.
"Nope, I'm leaving in twenty minutes. Any suggestions on where to visit?"
Tom rested his elbow on the opposite side of the transporter console. "There's a carnival of sorts going on in the Eastern quarter. If you're into animals, games and greasy food that's the place to find it. But might I suggest some sun protection." Tom tenderly touched two fingers to the pink skin on his forehead. "I hear there are some less….how shall I say it…..hectic places you can visit. B'Elanna and I are going to check out the lake tomorrow. Alone."
"That sounds more my speed," the ensign agreed. "Maybe I'll take a fishing rod."
"Uh, wouldn't do that. I've heard the fish bite back," Tom warned. Then he nodded goodbye and went to catch up with the rest of his family.
When he exited into the corridor, the others were nowhere to be seen or heard. Too much sugar, he thought while proceeding to the turbolift. With a rare quiet moment to himself Tom scanned the PADD in his hand. His breath caught in his throat before he could even make it past the first paragraph. The lift doors swished shut behind him.
Tom could feel his heart beating faster and faster threatening to leave his chest. He read and reread the words again. Eventually they sunk in. He slumped to the floor and absorbed the line one last time.
Your father passed away two days ago.
2025 hours
"I had a feeling I'd find you here."
As a soft, deep voice wafted into her reality, Lieutenant Leslie Swinn didn't feel any need to turn around. She smiled despite herself. Then she glanced upward toward the light of three glowing moons which reflected their mirror counterparts onto the still lake.
"Now how could you know a thing like that?" she asked to the night birds calling their songs from the trees.
Ensign Ashmore sidled up and sat next to her on the fallen log. "I seemed to remember you had an affinity for water."
"Shows how much you pay attention. I hate water."
"My mistake," he shrugged. "So what are we doing here?"
"I came to think. I guess you're here to interrupt me," she said. Though truth be told if anyone were to intrude on her reflections, she would have wanted it to be him.
"Actually, I came to bring you this." Ashmore held out a steaming mug of tea to her. Her lips betrayed a slight smile and she took it, wrapping her hands around and relishing in the warmth. She hadn't realized it had grown so chilly.
"Thanks," she said, taking a slow, comforting drink. The liquid warmed her from the inside completely just as his presence had warmed her soul. The honey he had added to it was thoughtful and sweet.
Ashmore turned his gaze to the reflections and noticed how they seemed almost iridescent. He felt as if he might fall into them and be swallowed up completely.
"It's been sixteen years Pete," she said finally. "Sixteen years."
"I've heard."
She stopped short of her next sip and looked at him. "What are we doing here?"
Ashmore smiled. There were so many ways to answer that question, but he went for the obvious answer first. "You're drinking a cup of tea. And I'm keeping you company." Then he took a chance and replied to the question's subtext. "And I'd like to continue to keep you company for the next sixteen years and then sixteen more after that and then….well, you get the idea."
Leslie's dark brown eyes had the power to draw his back to her. They met across the wafting steam from her cup and the moonlight. "Why Peter Ashmore. I had no idea."
He took her mug from her and set it down. "You're a lot of things Lessy, but I never took you for a liar."
"Just what do you take me for then?" She asked playfully.
He gently tangled her fingers with his own and kissed her chocolate-brown skin. "You are the finest, loveliest, tenderest, and most beautiful person I have ever known—and even that is an understatement."
"Mmmm….wait." She pondered with a coy smile. "Don't tell me….. H. G. Wells?"
Pete's laugh was whole-hearted and honest. She was the only one who could make him feel unabashed joy with such ease. He wanted that joy for the rest of his life, of this he was certain. "Close," he replied. "Fitzgerald."
"Did it take you sixteen years to find that quote?" she asked more seriously.
He shook his head. "No. It took that long to work up the nerve to recite it."
Leslie leaned back into his strong embrace and bit her lip. "So you've been planning this from the beginning have you?"
Pete sighed as he breathed in the sweet smell of her hair. "I fell in love with you. And that was the beginning of everything."
For a moment the universe spun into perfect alignment around them. She raised the back of his hand to her lips and placed a gentle kiss there in return.
"An engineer and a poet, what more could a girl ask for."
2105 hours
"I did it!"
The doctor adeptly maneuvered his holographic fingers across the computer terminal. If it was within his program to jump for joy he might have done it at that very moment.
"Computer," he asked. "Display results from the neural scan performed on Commander Tuvok last week.
The screen blinked to life and a ribbon of brain-wave patterns emerged onto the screen.
"Overlay the scans from this morning and magnify sections one-zero-four through six-eight-two."
The computer did as he asked. And there, in the multi-colored bar graph, the doctor saw what he had been looking for. It had taken nine years but his efforts had finally produced positive results.
He put his hands proudly on the counter. "Computer. Make a note in Commander Tuvok's medical log. Treatment fifty-six beta was successful at halting the degeneration of pathways in the prefrontal cortex."
2214 Hours
"No more sugar. Ever."
Tom smiled as B'Elanna heaved herself into a chair. "All of that excitement, all that running around. They should sleep well tonight." He finished recycling the bedtime snack dishes and joined her on the adjoining couch.
"I'm not sure what was more exhausting, keeping up with them outside all day or getting them to bed. You would think that after all that running and playing and screaming and eating that they would have begged to go to sleep."
Tom bit his lip and looked at her. She was beautiful. The love of his life. And even with disheveled hair, kid-worn eyes and what could potentially pass for just a smidge of sunburn – he wanted for nothing else.
B'Elanna caught his stare and stopped with her hands halfway through her hair. "What? Why are you looking at me like that."
Tom's demeanor grew serious. "We need to talk."
"Okay….."
"We got a letter from Pathfinder today."
"From Owen and Julia," she stated, already having seen the pictures that they sent to the kids.
"Yes. And another. From your Uncle Carl."
"Carl?" she asked. "What did he want?"
"It's your father, B'Elanna. He passed away two days ago. I'm so sorry."
2350 hours
Kathryn Janeway sat reading an old book in the minutes before she would turn in for the night. Though she tried to concentrate on the words, her thoughts kept drifting to other places. Mainly they drifted back to the Alpha Quadrant and another blue-green planet that she wished they could be orbiting instead of Eskao.
Moments later, the doors to her quarters swished open. She finished the sentence then lifted her eyes with a tired smile.
"Welcome back."
Chakotay stretched his arms up above his head and arched his back slightly then let out a barely stifled yawn.
"Long day?"
"All the fresh air, I think," he replied. Chakotay removed his jacket and folded it neatly over a dining room chair. Then he moved to join her on the couch.
"How did you and Neelix fare? Was the market worth your time?"
"It was. We've filled the storage bay, Airoponics will be busy for weeks and we brought back a few special items that I'm sure everyone will enjoy," he said with a sly smile.
"Did you find coffee?" she asked, suddenly excited. "No wait. Don't tell me, I want to be surprised."
Chakotay smiled at just how surprised everyone would be to see Neelix's special find on the menu once again.
"How was your day?" he asked her, reaching for a handful of almonds from the bowl on the table before him.
Janeway shrugged. "Quiet. Nothing much going on."
"Did you make it down at all?"
Janeway shook her head. "No, I had a bunch of little things to do. I'll go tomorrow."
"Good," Chakotay said. "I found a quiet spot by the lake and I thought I'd pack a picnic and take you there."
"I'll bring the blanket." Janeway shut her book and looked longingly out the window to the unique sight of the planet below. "Today was sixteen years, you know."
"I do know," he said. "But what's this I rumor I heard about Seven finding a shortcut."
Janeway nodded, still looking to the outside. "She met with a professor at the astro-research center. There is apparently a stable wormhole about four weeks from here. If it turns out to be what they say, it will shave another eighteen months off our journey."
"That's great," he replied.
"Fits and spurts Chakotay, we continue to make this journey in fits and spurts."
"Better than a long straight line, I'd say."
Kathryn nodded in agreement. "It should put us about three months from intercepting the deep space vessels that Starfleet launched."
"Our time alone is coming to an end, a few more years and we'll be home," he said with a dimpled smile. Then he leaned forward to place a hand on her knee.
Kathryn sighed, tearing her eyes away from the stars outside her window. She covered his hand with her own. "Sixteen years. Plus about three more... How did this take us two decades Chakotay?"
"The journey of our lives," he replied. "Would you honestly trade it?"
Kathryn considered his question. "I wouldn't. But…"
"You're concerned the others don't feel the same way?"
She nodded.
"Come with me tomorrow. If you let yourself, you'll see more than just a stranded crew taking a break. You'll see our family. And I don't honestly believe any one of them would have opted out."
Janeway smiled sadly. "I suppose you're right."
"I got a letter today from my sister. All's well. Anything come for you?" Chakotay asked.
"Yes, Phoebe. Same old, same old. Mom included a new recipe for us to try." Janeway felt her eyes beginning to close. "I think I'm going to turn in," she said and rose from the couch. "You coming?"
Chakotay nodded. "I have to run next door, I'll join you in a minute."
Kathryn wagged her finger at him. "Look both ways," she reminded.
"Always do," he assured her.
Chakotay watched Kathryn as she retreated into her bedroom. He saw a soft light waft out from the bedside lamp and knew that she would now begin her routine. First she would brush her hair out, then slip into her silk pajamas and eventually tuck herself up to the chin in soft sheets. When he would eventually join her, she would sigh contentedly and nuzzle her head into his chest. He smiled. That he should now be this intimate with her routine was all he could have ever hoped for.
It was a dream made reality on a night like this, exactly two years ago. Another depressing anniversary, another evening wallowing in regret. But on that specific night she had let her guard down. Chakotay rushed headlong into a decision for the both of them. And their lives had been made so much better for it.
Chakotay rose and went for the door then stopped short. "Computer, is there anyone in hallway three- beta?"
*Negative*
Chakotay laughed softly. There's never anyone in the hall, he thought. She still honestly believed that the crew wasn't on to them and it never ceased to amuse him. Especially since she was the one who had unknowingly divulged their secret. It was a moment he will never forget, a compliment whispered just a bit too loudly in the mess hall one evening. A lapse by in which Tom Paris was finally able to confirm what he had long suspected regarding their weekly "dinners." Chakotay received a hearty pat-on-the-back for that one, and a congratulatory smirk.
Still Chakotay agreed that they should attempt to be discreet. And so he returned to his quarters quickly and quietly.
Once inside he went straight for his medicine bundle. He reverently removed it from the drawer under his bookshelf and laid the animal skin out, folding the edges down smoothly as he had done a hundred times before. He moved the objects out of their center pile and took a small, black velvet box into his hands then sat on the couch to open it.
Inside was a simple silver ring in her size. He had purchased the metal from a trader over a year ago, worked it and engraved the inside personally with the phrase, "Wherever you go, I am with you." He traced a gentle finger over the smooth outside and placed it back into the box.
He didn't honestly expect her to wear or even accept it until they reached Earth. In fact, he wouldn't bother to ask. But he wanted her to know that he had it. And so tomorrow, during their picnic by a most serenely beautiful lake, he would show it to her.
Today may have been an uneventful one in a string of thousands of others just like it. But tomorrow…. He would make sure that she would always remember tomorrow with a smile.
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