Mirror Image: Longing

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, J.K. Rowling does, though I'd love to take the twins home with me.
Pairings: Fred/George (sort of)
Summary: Fred and George have feelings for each other that they can't figure out, but can't ignore, either...
Song: Ready Fuels by Anberlin

The door to the small, dark bedroom opened with a bang as the two exhausted inhabitants dragged in, sweaty and sore from a great game of Quidditch. Down the hall, their younger brother was already asleep, still fully clothed, and their parents were readying for bed. Their two eldest brothers were occupying the bathroom, one waiting outside the door while the other showered, waiting for his turn, trying not to fall asleep against the wall on which he was leaning.

"Some game, eh?" one said as he sat on the bed, running a hand through his hair and sighing tiredly. The other nodded, leaning against the opposite wall.

"Ickle Ronniekins may actually have a shot at Keeper this year, but-" George started.

"-we musn't let him know that." Fred finished with a small smirk. He kicked his shoes off and peeled his sweaty shirt off of his torso, tossing it in the direction of the hamper. His chest glistened with a light sheen of sweat in the moonlight filtering in through the windows.

After a moment, George realized he was staring and lay back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling instead. He ferverently ignored the funny feeling blossoming in the pit of his stomach. It had been happening for weeks now; George would see his twin with a towel around his waist after a shower, or just sitting at the kitchen table, even, and he'd find himself gazing hungrily at those lips, so much like his own. It scared him.

He'd never had feelings like this for a boy before, especially not his twin brother. His twin. What would Fred think if he knew? What would his family, his friends, think?

----

Its gotten over without a key or gasoline tonight
Fill everything on fire and just to kill you for your just goodnight
Help me to wait on you, hesitate on through, cause I'm alone
Feel so jaded, contemplative, waiting for you

----

Fred was watching George nervously from where he stood. He was grateful for another opportunity to look at his brother for as long as he wanted. Often when they went to bed, Fred would delight in his brother's warm body against his, and would find himself staring at his brother's sleeping form for who knows how long, admiring him, before finally falling asleep.

Fred knew he had a crush on his twin; it was undeniable. And while Fred knew it was wrong, it's not as though anything would come of it. There was no harm in just looking. Now, as George lay there, oblivious to his brother's gaze, Fred admired his mirror image. They were identical, but Fred had found that George had a slightly pointier nose than he, and green flecks in his beautiful blue eyes as opposed to the gold flecks in Fred's. The freckles on his back were a unique pattern, very simliar to the markings on Fred's skin but with extra smatterings here and there, or an expanse of creamy skin in a spot where Fred's skin was mottled with the little brown flecks.

The shower finally shut off, and the twins could hear whoever had been the last to use it tiptoe down the hall and into their bedroom, the door shutting with a quiet click. George sat up, stretching, and met Fred's eyes. "Guess we'd better shower, then." he said. A blush spread across his cheeks almost instantly as he imagined both of them showering together. George shook it off, before noticing that Fred was staring at him. Standing up, George gazed directly into Fred's eyes, unblinking, trying to read the strange look in his twin's stare. After a moment, Fred snapped out of it and blushed, clearing his throat and looking at the windows past George's head.

"Right. Well, uh, I guess I'll go first, then." Fred answered awkwardly, turning towards the door. His brother's voice, soft and low, stopped him.

"Fred." he said simply, taking a step toward his brother. Fred turned toward him and they stood, a few feet apart, looking at each other again. They saw the longing in each other's eyes and both started to get nervous.

'It's not right, we're twins. TWINS, for godssakes. I shouldn't want to kiss him. But I do, so badly...' George thought, his gaze never moving from Fred. His eyes trailed slowly to Fred's lips, and back up to his eyes again.

'I'm completely buggered. I want to kiss my goddamn twin. God, that's not all I want to do to him. This is sick, it's wrong... it doesn't feel wrong, though. God, he's so beautiful.' Fred thought as he took in the sight of his brother, the moonlight making an aura around him, his sweaty shirt clinging to the lean muscles of his arms and shoulders, his eyes smoldering. Fred was shocked as he watched George's eyes drifting to his lips. His knees turned to jelly.

"George..." Fred said weakly, trailing off. The butterflies in his stomach were doing a frantic dance, pushing upwards, overtaking his throat and drowning out his words. George looked at the floor, swallowing nervously.

"I'm going to go shower." he muttered, heading for the door. He swept past Fred and out of the room, quickly locking himself in the bathroom and leaning against the door. He had seen the way Fred looked at him. He had woken up once, barely slitting his eyes open against the moonlight, to see Fred gazing at him, almost...lovingly? George turned on the shower and peeled his sweaty clothes off, stepping into the rush of hot water and steam with a sigh. He thought of his brother, standing there, bathed in shadow from George's tall frame blocking the light from the window, his eyes burning a hole through George's, hungry, but there was a pain behind it. George felt it now, leaning against the shower wall. Fred felt the same way about him, and it was hopeless. A fantasy that would never come true.

----
(we're running) We're running hard tonight and it feels so good
Your arm in mine, here, nearly midnight and it feels so right
Girls and the boys chase down running hard tonight

----
Fred sat on the twin's full-sized mattress and sighed. He might have imagined the look in his twin's eyes, for all he knew. The way George left...it was as if he couldn't get away from Fred fast enough.

"Great, now I've put him off." Fred muttered aloud. Pulling his pants off, he slipped into a pair of pajama bottoms and lay on his side of the bed, on top of the covers, his hands laced under his head as he stared up at the ceiling. He imagined patterns, faces of people he knew, etched out in the bumpy pattern of the ceiling.

"I'm sorry, George." he said aloud. "I'm sorry I looked at you that way. I'm sorry I had those feelings for you and I'm sorry nothing can come of it." Fred continued, quietly, to the ceiling. He knew he wouldn't feel any better saying it; not if George weren't there to hear him. To accept his apology, or turn away from him. To give him closure and help him end this game that was slowly wearing on his heart. He was unaware of the person standing on the other side of the door, listening to every word.

----

Running down the ready fuels it's finally over, just get over
Time will tell if all turns out ok
Help me to realize my dream is dying, redefine just where I turned away
So look the other way tonight

----

George stepped out of the shower, muttering irritatedly that Ginny should move her strawberry-scented shampoo away from his as he kept using it by mistake, wrapping a towel around his waist. Opening the door, George entered the hallway in a rush of steam as cool air hit the balmy interior of the bathroom. He tiptoed down the hall to his and Fred's bedroom, trying to come up with a plan. Should he bring his feelings up? Or just go to sleep and ignore the look he had seen, finally, after wishing to see it for so long, in Fred's eyes? Sighing, George ran a hand through his wet hair and stopped in front of the door, which was cracked open just barely.

He was reaching for the door handle when Fred's voice stopped him.

"I'm sorry, George."

----

(we're running) We're running for it tonight and it feels so good
Your hand in mine, here, nearly midnight and it feels so right
Girls and the boys chase down running for it tonight

Can you wait for me a little, little longer?

----

George gaped at the door as his twin's quiet voice emanated through the crack.

"I'm sorry I looked at you that way." George's eyes widened and his hand dropped to his side.

"I'm sorry I had those feelings for you-" His lower lip began to tremble.

"-and I'm sorry nothing can come of it." His eyes slowly filled with tears.

----

(we're running) We're running for it tonight and it feels so good
Your hand in mine here, near midnight and it feels so right
Girls and the boys chase down running for it tonight

----

Fred sighed, closing his eyes. He felt a sob welling up in his throat but he choked it back. A few tears rolled down his cheeks as his heart started to ache. He wished George were in bed so that he could have his nightly dose of his twin, so that he could cast his eyes upon his beautiful, forbidden fruit and let his fantasies tape his heart back together, at least until the next day.

George silently pushed open the door, slipping into the darkness of the room. Fred didn't notice; his eyes were still closed, and he was oblivious, staring at the back of his eyelids and wondering vainly what to do.

Slipping the towel off, George pulled on a pair of boxers and a clean shirt with the stealth of a cat, never once alerting his twin that he was in the room. Taking a step towards the bed, George took a moment to admire the peaceful look on his face, the moonlight caressing the contours of his body. He noticed the tear streaks and his bottom lip took to trembling again, a few tears slipping from his own eyes. The emotions flooding his body were overwhelming. He carefully slipped onto the bed next to his twin, his mirror image, his other half, and lay next to him, their skin centimeters apart.

Fred tensed, feeling George's weight shifting the bed. He could smell the intoxicating scent of George's skin, the smell of the soap they used mixed with strawberries. He must have used Ginny's shampoo by mistake again. Fred smiled and breathed in. There was always a hint of something else, as well...but Fred never pinpointed it. It was something unique and wonderful, and Fred often wondered how his scent could make Fred think of a million things at once...pine needles, apples, a faint hint of cinnamon. Fred imagined that George smelled like summer.

Fred could feel the heat emanating off his skin and George's, mingling in the small space between them and swallowed nervously.

George's gaze was still fixed on Fred, and he had a strange desire to reach out and touch him. The moonlight gave his skin an unearthly glow and George briefly wondered if it would feel as good as it looked against his. Blushing slightly, George inhaled deeply. The scent of Fred's skin, of sweat and salt and an underlying hint of warm apple cider, sweet and sultry.

'I can't bear this much longer.' Fred thought, opening his eyes to look at George. He was startled to find George looking back at him, his eyes half closed, his lips parted. George met Fred's gaze and Fred saw the raw longing staring back at him, a mirror image of his own. George's eyes widened a bit and the longing started to slip behind a mask of awkwardness. Fred could feel himself blushing.

"G'night, Fred." George said after a moment, breaking the silence. His tone was almost...disappointed, as he slipped under the covers and rolled onto his side away from Fred, cursing himself. Fred sighed and slipped under the covers as well, turning towards the windows.

"Night, George." he whispered. Fred waited until he felt his twin's breathing become steady and slow before turning over. It was well into early morning before Fred could fall asleep, the daunting image of his twin imprinted on his mind, his thoughts stirring and keeping him awake until he finally fell into dreamless sleep.

----

Can you wait for me a little longer?

----

Hey, all! I'm so sorry about the lack of updates on Overachiever and the like, I've gotten so busy, and my inspiration is taking it's sweet time to come back to me. My latest musical obsession is Anberlin, and I've recently taken to reading twincest fics (I got bored, came across one and got hooked). I listened to Ready Fuels, and looked up the lyrics, and got this sudden rush of inspiration for a songfic. Please review, I'd like to know what you think. This will most likely either have a sequel coughRATEDMcough or turn into a chapter story.

Thanks for reading and please review!!

-Charlotte-

P.S. I cut out a bit of lyrics at the end:

(we're running) We're running for it tonight and it feels so good
Your hand in mine here near midnight and it feels so right
Girls and the boys chase down running for it tonight

I liked ending it where I did. Sorry, Anberlin!