A/N: This may not be everyone's piece of cake, it just came to me one morning in math class, and it made me laugh and look like an idiot. Even more worryingly, the people in my math class just took it in their stride, and ignored me. I think maybe I should try to act more normal... Oh well. Screw normality, I'm having fun. Just a Charlie/Amita ficlet with a dose of Megan for those of you who miss her.


A Different Kind of Math

Megan had just finished trying to fathom Charlie's latest analogy when she heard a stifled gasp from the other side of the room. Alarmed, she looked over sharply to see Amita, staring at her hand and outstretched fingers like they were extra appendages she had never seen before.

"Yes, I know!" Charlie gushed, gazing happily up at his blackboard, and as usual, misunderstanding completely. "It's regal!" His girlfriend payed him no heed, and returned to counting on her fingers. Closed fist to thumb to thumb and index finger and so on until her pinky finger, apprehension dawning on her face with every passing digit. Megan raised her eyebrows. She didn't have to be a profiler to know that something was up, but her profiling skills made it easy to know what it was that was so high to make Amita gasp out loud.

"Five?" She asked, and Amita nodded slowly, still dumbstruck. "Always four?" She nodded again, and squeaked like a hyperactive mouse on helium. Charlie was momentarily distracted from his mistresss the blackboard.

"What's always four?" He asked suspiciously, wanting to know if there was some sort of secret math going on which he wasn't allowed to see.

"Nothing." Megan hastened, as Amita seemed to be beyond words. Nonetheless, Charlie's eyes narrowed further.

"No, tell me. I will be able to help." Megan smiled wryly.

"I think that it's best that you ask Amita about this math later on, when you're alone." Now he was intrigued.

"Why can't I ask her now? What kind of math? Why wait until we're alone?" He counted to five on his own fingers, like Amita had, his forehead creased when thes did not give hi any more answers than he had mere seconds before.

"Charlie," The FBI agent began, adopting her best childminding voice, "This isn't game theory or the Eppes convergence. This is a totally different kind of math." Literally with a bounce in her step, Megan practically skipped across the office, and hugged the shocked mathematician, beaming like Christmas had come early. "Call me later when you've done the working." Throwing one last look into Charlie's bemused face, she skipped forth from the room, to go find Don and undoubtedly tell him what had just happened.

Charlie turned back to his girlfriend, who was still staring at her hand, although her expression was slowly lightening, a wide smile seeping across her lips.

"What's so funny?" Asked the frustrated Charlie, his brilliant mind incapable of fathoming the simplicity of the situation. "Why are you counting on your fingers? You're a mathematician, Amita, and a very capable one at that. I'm sure that you can count up to five in your head-"

"Charlie-"

"-and I would understand the math if you told me what it was. After all, I am a mathematician too, and I daresay I'm rather good at being one-"

"-listen, Charlie-"

"Just give me the first letter-"

"-I'm pregnant."

"-I can..." He stared at her, in a moment of confusion, as if he was yet to grasp the full meaning of her words. "Come again?" Finally, he requested, still shellshocked. Amita now seemed no more calm, but a lot more excited.

"I'm having a baby, Charlie!" She squeaked, even higher and a lot louder than before.

"I don't think I quite... What does a baby have to do with math?" The distress was clear in his voice, which was already two octaves higher than normal. At least.

"Charlie," She moved around the desk separating them, that wide smile growing wider by the minute. "We're having a baby." He narrowed her eyes at her.

"That was period math, wasn't it?" Immediately, she slapped his arm. "Ow!"

"Stop thinking about math, Charlie!" He stared at her, blankly, so she sighed and conceeded. "Okay, don't stop completely."

"We're having a baby." Even he was sounding excited now, having overcome the initial shock and pantwetting horror of the sudden news.

"Yes, Charlie. We are going to have a baby."

"A real one?"

"Yes Charlie," Amita replied patiently, her heart bursting with pride and happiness. "A real one." With a whoop and a cry which attracted many a passerby, Charlie scooped up his girfriend in to a giant bear hug, making her laugh.

"We're having a real baby!" He chorussed, unable to quite believe the words coming from his mouth.

"She's gonna be a genius, like her daddy was." Amita gushed, and Charlie held her at arms length, eyes glaring.

"What do you mean: were? And who said that it's going to be a she?" Amita giggled at his response.

"You think that it'll be a he?"

"Well technically it's an it right now..." Charlie halted, staring at his partner with such emotion that her knees shook and her heart beat so fast she thought it mihgt explode. "But I don't care. It's a baby." He kissed her nose fondly and pulled her close against his chest, so she could not move. "We're having a baby." Just a whisper, even though her eardrums felt like they were going to burst.

"Yes, we are." Leaning her head tenderly against his shoulder, Amita closed her eyes. "And I don't care if she's has an average IQ, I'd love her anyway." Charlie grinned against her hair.

"There we go with the 'she' again- ow!"

"We will name her Bonnie."

"Fine."