Author's Note/s: I do not own ONE PIECE! LUFFY DOES! Nah~! ODA~SAMA does!

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Enjoy reading! This is a crack-pairing and there is a slight romance in it or not or more? Haha!

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Strange Love

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Chapter 1: Mouth Like A Magazine

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Nami unconsciously brushed the few of her hair strands away from her face. She forced a smile as the old folks at table one are taking forever in deciding what breakfast meal they will order.

"I.. I think let's get the pancake?" old Robin suggested to her husband.

"But..I want some cola.." old Franky had to whine over something he really wasn't allowed now due to old age.

"There there.." old Robin patted her husband's shoulder blade. "Let's just order some lemonade. That one is as refreshing as a cola, right?"

"Yeah.." He answered slowly but smiled at her sincerely.

"So…" Nami began "What are you two going to order?"

"WHA!?" Both the old folk spoke at the same time and laughed their hearts out "Sorry Miss, We.. We haven't decided that yet.."

Nami gave them a fake smile. She was screaming inside but did her best to act fine. It has taken twenty minutes of her time by just taking an order in table one and there are still other costumers waiting.

"Nami-chan, there's a phone call for you!" Vivi called out while holding the phone over her chest.

"I'll be back!" Nami snickered evilly at the two "I hope when I got back, you already have decided what you want.."

While she walks away from the old folks, she heard them giggle and snickered playfully but decided to ignore them and take the phone call.

"Keimi! Tashigi! Could you two take some of the tables' order?" She ordered while grabbing the phone from Vivi.

They both nodded at her with cheery spirits making Nami sigh in relief knowing full well that they would do what they were asked to.

She held the phone on her ears.

"Hello?"

"OI! NAMI!" Luffy practically screamed over the telephone.

"LUFFY?" She growled loudly making the costumers and the diner staff look at her with different expressions on their faces.

She turned her back at them and whispered at the phone but what she didn't know that her voice is still that loud. Everyone can hear everything she's saying.

"WHAT IS IT?" Nami tapped her foot constantly and irritably.

"WHERE'S MY BREAKFAST?" Luffy pouted while he picks his nose.

"Its..in…the..kitchen counter and please don't pick on your nose while you're on the phone!" She gritted her teeth.

"WOAH! HOW DID YOU KNOW?" Luffy was so amazed.

"Argh!—"

Luffy turned around and saw a plastic bottle of hot milk and a Tupperware bento completely sealed with plastic and started laughing insanely over the telephone making the orange haired woman much more furious.

"Is that all?" She asked doing her best to be patient.

"Meh…Can I call Chopper and Coby to come over and play?" He jumps excitedly while waiting for an answer.

Nami sighed and massaged her temples as she tries to think the pros and cons on having Luffy's friends to play while she's not there to watch over them..

"Okay.. Just-"

"YEAAAAHHH! THANK YOU NAMI!" Luffy cheered and immediately hang up the phone.

Nami sighed as she hanged the phone. The diner's chef went to sneak his head out of the kitchen window as he looks at her.

"Is it your brother again, Nami~swan?"

"Yeah , Sanji.." She dusted her apron as she makes her way on the kitchen counter to grab some glass of water to soothe her dry throat. She looks outside the windows and saw a mirage of heat wave from afar and some dried creosote bush rolling down the desert road of One Piece Route 666.

'I wonder how Luffy will deal with this heat..' She thought.

Just looking at the view outside makes her thirsty so she decided to look at the stupid catastrophe happening behind her.

When she turned, three beautiful faces of her co-workers greeted her and behind them a chef in his love mode.

"So, when will your brother Luffy visit us again?" Vivi asked excitedly.

"It's good that you are a strong girl Nami! You need that knowing you have great responsibility to take care of your brother.." Keimi taps her cheek with her index finger and nodded at the common wisdom she imparted.

"But are you two going to be okay, since it's just the two of you alone in an old shack? What will you do if some old thugs come crashing in your house!" Tashigi shakes in fear.

"Yeah, But when I came across your house the other day, I just realized that there is an abandoned diner still standing so close behind your house and facing the other road.." Vivi looks at her confused.

"Ah! That's part of our property too. I bought it along with the old shack." Nami smirked at them when the girls are in such awe of how she managed to buy a shack and an old diner and can still take care of her brother in such a young age.

"Don't stand there talking and get your asses back to work!" Loud footsteps came out of the storage room as the great Sef came out looking like he's in a very bad mood.

"OI! OLD MAN! DON'T GO TALKING TO NAMI~SWAN LIKE THAT!" Sanji growled but was met with hard punch on his jaw.

The girls tensed up and ran to any table that needs some service. Nami was about to take the meals to their respective tables but was stopped midway as large hands caught her arms. She looks at Sef with great horror in her face but was quite surprised when he was not looking at her but on the diner's entrance door.

Suddenly, it became so quiet inside the diner that Nami didn't realize.

"You." He began to whisper "Call the police."

Nami cocked an eyebrow at their manager but when she turned to look at the entrance door, she was shock to see one of the notorious wanted criminals in the road of OP Route 666.

'Doflamingo!' Everyone screamed the name on their heads.

"Why those two have to do some food delivery at a bad time.." Sanji whispers.

'Ah! Yes, Zoro and Usopp! I hope they'd hurry up and get back! This is the time when we needed Zoro the most!" Nami thought to herself as she remembers that Usopp is great at shooting and Zoro at close combat skills. They were the ones that keep the peace at the One Piece Diner.

….

On a very deserted road, Usopp sneezed hard it echoed around them.

"What is it?" Zoro glanced at him with his forever nonchalant face.

"It's nothing.." Usopp answered calmly but a vein suddenly popped on his head "WHY DO I EVEN BOTHERED TALKING TO YOU!? YOU'RE THE ONE THAT GOT US LOST! I'M FEELING WE'LL NEVER FIND OUR WAY BACK HOME!" He screamed with large beads of tears running down his cheeks. He turned to look at the green haired man but was shock when he was actually talking to a sleeping man. He went back to fixing their exhausted motorcycles.

….

Doflamingo leaned his back coolly on the window just beside the diner's door. He dropped his heavy bag and as his bag slammed on the floor a squishy sound came out of it and red blood stains are making itself more visible on his bag's cloth.

"What.. What's in the bag?" Nami asked.

Everyone looked at her like she was the craziest person for asking that man.

"Hm.." He licked his lips lustfully while looking at her as he answered her in a very deep voice "I don't know.."

"What do you want?" Sef took a step forward when he realizes how this man looks at his worker.

"Just the usual.." Doflamingo shrugs "Money and women.." He eyed the orange haired waitress.

Tashigi, along with Vivi and Keimi gasped as the threatening man inside the diner slowly pointed a pistol at their manager, Sef.

"Get in my way, and I'll be glad to send you to your death bed." Doflamingo chuckled evilly.

Everyone knows he's saying bullshit. They all know that he's going to pull the trigger anyway. Nami ran in front of Sef as she clearly plans to kick the gun out of the criminal's hand.

Doflamingo and Sef was startled by Nami's swift launch towards the gun but before Sef can manage to pull his waitress away from the pointing gun Doflamingo slowly pulled the trigger.

At that same time, the entrance door of the diner opened abruptly and violently towards the window where Doflamingo was sitting. He misfired and the bullet when up on the ceiling as the door hit him hard. The impact is so strong his body smashed and breaks the window glass to pieces.

His body now lies unconscious outside of the diner were some glass was scattered on the dirt and some pierces through in his body.

He slowly stood up and ran as she screams of getting revenge but he was just ignored.

Everyone was dead silent at the new comer. He entered the diner like nothing strange is happening around him. He ignored all the curious faces and the tension that still hang in the air.

The new comer intimidated all the guys inside the diner as his leather jacket, with grey feather wings printed on the back, looks so expensive even though it is already covered with road dusts. The clanging sound of his metal belt, his erratic low breathing, and his firm muscles made the female costumers gulped in admiration.

He sat down on a chair and he had one foot on the table while still wearing his dirty combat boots.

The new comer looked at Sef and nodded at him in which the manager ignored with an "Hmpf!"

Sef motioned for Nami to take the new comer's order.

Every one of Sef's staff was shocked when their manager, before he was out of sight, glared at the new comer.

"Don't expect me to give you discounts on what you order. You stupid—"

"Is that how you wished and decided to greet your son? SEF!"

"You are never my son, SMOKER."

With that Sef went back to his office and Smoker brought out of his pockets some dirty rocks and placed it on the table while Nami stands in front of him. Sanji didn't know if he was hearing right but he heard the old manager chuckle and saw some happy glint in his eyes. Nami was unsure if she has heard right that Smoker chuckled a bit like the ugly banter between him and Sef is something like a secret warm greeting between them.

"So Sef have a son?" Vivi whispered

"Now I can see the resemblance!" Tashigi whispered back and all the girls started gossiping again but a loud clearing of throat, obviously from Sef, made them go back to their work.

Smoker decided to do some rock balancing on the table to kill time completely ignoring Nami. This definitely annoyed her.

"So…What are you going to order SIR?" Nami emphasized with obvious irritation on her voice.

"What?" Smoker eyed her curiously.

"You cannot lounge here without ordering. People who will come to order will need a table." Nami said furiously without giving a care if she's talking to the manager's son.

He looks around coolly and stares back at her.

"I can see there are still more unoccupied tables." Smoker immediately went back to doing his hobby.

Nami heard Vivi and the others snickered behind her making her do the most evil thing.

She grabbed Smoker's dirty rocks and threw it at his face and with that he grabbed her arm. She squinted as his hand tightened its hold onto her and easily pushed her forward onto him, forcing her to look up to the furious man in front of her.

"DON'T…YOU..EVER..DARE..TO DO THAT..AGAIN." He hissed at her.

They were two centimeters apart from each other's faces making the onlookers cooed behind them but Nami is unexpectedly distracted by something else.

She didn't know that a man like this thug smells so good even with that ragged look. It's been a while since she came this close to someone, especially a man. Her brother Luffy was an exception, for she's the one who buys their shampoo and bath soap making them smells the same but this man in front of her is making her dizzy in a positive way.

She was startled when she was pushed back towards nothing but she unfortunately slammed her back on something hard. She looked up and saw it was Zoro, who is still wearing his motor helmet.

"Just.. Don't do that.." Smoker's calm voice assured her that all is fine now as long as she didn't disturb his rock balancing. He returned back to his rocks again.

She composed herself and stood firm. Zoro looks at her and she nodded silently telling him that there is nothing to worry. He has always been the most protective guy in the OP Diner and Sef calls the green haired man his most reliable person among the staff.

But she remembered something and immediately punched Zoro and Usopp's head and began her unending rant on how their impeccable timing seems to benefit both of them. Vivi and Keimi started to explain at the two what happened earlier.

Nami went to approach Smoker and asked again, "Order?"

"Just water.." He said without looking back at her.

She went back to the kitchen to get something and while she does that, Sef approached her.

"It's always a bad idea to touch or disturb his rocks."

"Yeah.." Nami unconsciously agreed at the old man. Sef chuckled and went back to his work.

Smoker was so focused at what he's doing that he didn't notice the glass placed on his side. After some time, it caught his attention. It was a large glass of ice cold beer and under the glass there is a tissue with a note in it.

This is for saving this diner.

Thanks!

–Nami 3

It was unfortunate that Nami didn't saw or catch a glimpse of the smirking Smoker as he reads the note.

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HEY~! TO BE CONTINUED!

Author's notes: I was really expecting this to be a one-shot fan fic but I can't resist myself for writing more and the ideas keeps on coming. Novi-chan, Chopper-chi, Kyo-chan and the rest! Hope you read this hihi!

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Hope I can update soon though, but how was it dear readers? Reviews will truly be appreciated!