Over the past few monthes of mayhem in Zombieland, almost everyone in the United States, had been turned into a zombie. It was Just Columbus, Tallahassee, Wichita, and Little Rock.
Columbus was sad, yet happy about the last few days, sad because he had shot Bill Murray. And Happy because he'd finally gotten to first base with Wichta.
The Incident at Pacific Playland had taken Little Rock away from amusement parks forever.
Tallahassee finally got his Twinky.
Wichta got the privilage of jumping out a moving vehicle.
The night was upon them, and morning was still far away. Wichta had to get away from Pacific Playland as fast as possible so they could avoid facing all those other zombies that had seen the lights but not quite reached them yet. But she still followed her one rule about driving, dont go over 75.
Columbus, being the virgin he is, was itching to get to 2nd base, and also hoping to get a double and make it all the way to thind in one hit. But that was still a long ways away. "So Crista," he began.
"Nuh uh uh." She shook her head, "Don't call me by my real name in front of Austin Stevens over there," she gestured towards Tallahassee, who by the way was passed out in the back seat. Zombie killing must really take it out of him.
"Oh, Austin Stevens, the snake hunter guy, because of his snake skin jacket, haha thats funny." Columbus mumbled.
Little Rock popped up from behind Columbus and rested her chin on the back of Columbus's seat. "So, where are we going?" she asked.
"Somewhere you are going to like." Said Wichita, "somewhere absolutely zombie free."
that woke up Tallahassee. "Where?" he gasped.
"I think she was about to tell us anyway, Tallahassee." Columbus told him.
"Shut up you little spitfuck." Tallahassee warned. "I still got a clip left in my Desert Eagle." Tallahasse pulled his pistol out of the pocket in his snake skin jacked and cocked the gun. "Go on Wichita."
"Well I'm guessing zombies can't swim." she said. "Because they're too stupid to keep their head out of the water and they aren't even coordinated enough to walk properly, you know, they limp."
"Good point," said Little Rock, "But what does that have to do with where we're going?"
Wichita took a small map out of her coat pocket and unfolded it.
"We're going to Canada?" Tallahassee yelled. "That's almost as good as Twinkies!"
"Actually," Wichita corrected, "We're going to Vancouver Island." She pointed to a little island just off the coast of B.C.
"How are we going to get there?" asked Columbus.
"A, B.C. Ferry," said Wichita. "We'll drive to Vancouver and catch a ferry to Nanaimo."
"But who's gonna' drive the ferry?" Tallahasse Pointed out. "Did you think of that?"
"Actually yes, I did." Withita said. "Columbus."
oh shit! Columbus thought, I can't drive a fucking ferry! He looked at Wichita, fine, I'll do it for her. "Oh yeah sure, I can do it!"
"Great I'll wake you up at seattle when it's your turn to drive," Wichita told him. "Goodnight" she said mockingly, and kissed him gently before he fell asleep.
