Disclaimer: Don't own
This story is just an AU of that scene where Edward calls Bella into the woods before he tells her that he's leaving and she won't be going with him. Just an AU where he called her into the forest for a slightly different reason, that will still end up with them breaking up and the slow descent into the awesomeness that is Edward/Jacob (jakeward) slash. Don't like it? Don't read it.
Edward paced, unable to remain still; knowing he was scaring Bella, but unable to bring himself to care. He couldn't believe he had been so blind. Couldn't believe it had taken him so long to finally notice. Nearly two years.
"Edward, you're scaring me." Bella said.
Edward stopped pacing for a moment to look at her before he continued, still at a loss as to just how this was going to work; how he was going to tell her. She was so insecure, so clumsy, so new it made his heart ache, and he couldn't imagine how he had made the mistake he had.
"Soul and body do not always stay together Edward. Don't become so fixed on the vassal that you miss the important part."
But he had allowed himself to become fixated, and now… now he had made promises he could not keep, all because he had been too blind to see, too stupid to remember.
"Bella… we can't be together anymore." He heard himself say.
Her Shinny newness grated on him suddenly, as did the blankness of her mind and he cursed himself a fool once more for not understanding sooner.
"Edward…?" was all that she could say.
"I'm sorry Bella." He said, finally stopping completely and looking at her. "I should never have let it get this far… but you just… you look so much like her that I just forgot…"
Bella looked frantic. "Forgot? Edward, what are you talking about?"
She did deserve and explanation and it was up to him to provide it. But where to find the right words. How to explain without breaking her already fragile, undeveloped little psyche into unfixable pieces. "I was in love, a long, long time ago; to a woman who looked just like you." He said finally, his voice no louder than a whisper, but every word hammered home into Bella, he could see it in the growing pain in her eyes. "She got sick. I wanted so much to change her before she died, but she wouldn't let me. She told me that her soul was the most precious thing she had to offer, and that it would destroy her to give it up for immortality."
He closed his eyes as he remembered.
"Immortality means nothing Edward; only life means something. I want to live Edward. But to live means that one day your body will die. But your soul will live on, and you will be reborn, and life will begin all over again."
"I watched her die, and I swore that I would find her again, so that we could be together again. I just… I got so caught up in loving you because you looked so much like her, that I forgot the most important part of what she told me. I didn't even realise until you kept asking me to turn you…"
Bella was heartbroken, it was clear to see, and it made Edward ache. But he couldn't do this anymore. He couldn't keep pretending that she was what he was looking for. It would be unfair to both of them.
"I… I'm sorry Bella. I am so sorry." And he turned and fled, her words echoing in his head.
"I can't save your soul Edward, but I can give you something with mine. I can't give you life. I don't want to die Edward… I want to live, and I want you to live through me."
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I could not get this out of my head, and I figured I needed a plausiable way to get Edward and Jacob together, and I have always liked the concept of souls being reborn etc. I hope you enjoyed this fic, and hopefully I will have more to offer soon.
