BLACK DOOM'S FAMILY REUNION

It's a quiet day in the Black Comet… Well, sort of..

A convenient live sit-com crowd cheers.

BLACK DOOM: "As you can see, my loyal minions, the Day of Reckoning is finally arrived! We shall enslave all the dirty humanity and devour the fools who dares to oppose us! WE ARE THE BLACK ARMS!!"

MINION: "Roughlllroorg…"

DOOM: "What?"

MINION: "Brrrghllrourgh."

DOOM: "What in the rotten fiery hell are you saying!?"

MINION: "RRROOUURGHBLG!!"

DOOM: "Speak some blasted English you cosmic spawn! Why do you think I'm sending you to school? For eating your classmates!?"

MINION: "Roughrrl?"

DOOM: "Well, that too… But that's not the point!"

MINION: "Rourggh, rauyerrrrbbbblg, roarrringulpinfffsssthrr, hiss…"

DOOM: "….. Just, don't eat before the regular break, ok?"

MINION: "Okey Dokey!"

DOOM: "AND NO MORE SUPER MARIO GAMES!!"

MINION: "Mamma mia!"

The crowd laugh.

DOOM: "Who dares laughing at me? The one and only ruler of all that exists!?"

A Mario cosplayer goes hysterical.

DOOM: "YOU WILL DIE, MORTAL!!"

Suddenly, the Mario fan gets horribly mutilated and eaten by rotting alien spores.

DOOM: "Grrrr, How am I suppose to rule the entire universe when I'm surrounded by incompetent fools! Am I the only intelligent being in the God forsaken galaxy!?"

Enters Shadow.

The fangirls go mad.

SHADOW: "HI, DAD! It's me, your ultimate son!"

DOOM: "Great… I'm not your dad!"

SHADOW: "Yes you are, I was born from your blood, remember?"

DOOM: "Every. Hellish. Night. Of my immortal life. But, still, I'm NOT your father!?"

SHADOW: "Weeell, Gerald is my only other parent, I thought he was my mom but.."

DOOM: "I'M WARNING YOU! DON'T GO EVEN NEAR THERE OR YOU WILL EXPERIENCE SORROW BEYOND IRRATIONAL FEAR!"

SHADOW: "Whatever. Ehi, is everything ready for the dinner?"

DOOM: "Of what blasted dinner are you talking about?"

SHADOW: " The Family reunion's dinner! Didn't you know?"

DOOM: "THE +ING WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?"

SHADOW: "You forgot, eh? Well that's too bad, they're already on the way."

Enters the Robotnik Family.

The crowd cheers.

GERALD: "Hi, honey! I'm home!."

DOOM: "I must have some brain sucking Futurama like snails on the head right now…. Because there's no way you just called me how I think you just called me!!"

GERALD: "Well, since we are Shadow's parents I thought one of us were supposed to be the father and the other…"

DOOM: "ARE YOU IMPLING THAT WE (AS FOR ME AND YOU) ARE A COUPLE!? THAT IS THE MOST DISGUSTING THING I'VE EVER HEARD! And I use human guts for fancy festivities decorations!"

MARIA: "Auntie Doom, I'm so so so so so so happy to see you!"

Maria hugs an over bewildered and disgusted Black Doom.

DOOM: "AAAAARRRRGH! I'm being attacked by some kind of blond Alice like hugging machine freak!! Get +the off of ME!! For+ Sake!!"

Suddenly, a very familiar music plays.

I am the EGGMAN, that's what I am.

I am the EGGMAN, I got the Master Plan.

EGGMAN: "Whahahahahahahahahaha!! Surrender all the desserts to the Eggman Empire!"

I will conquer the dinner with my tools.

DOOM: "Shut this Satandamned music or I'll will turn your egg belly into a hunting trophy!!"

EGGMAN: "Ok, auntie Doom."

DOOM: "I AM NOT YOUR AUNT!!"

SHADOW: "As a matter of fact, I'm still wondering about the genealogy here… Oh well."

Enter E-102 Gamma, E-123 Omega and Metal Sonic.

GAMMA: "HOW ARE YOU GENTLEMEN, ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US. YOU'RE ON YOUR WAY FOR DESTRUCTION."

DOOM: " What the acid burnt +ing Devil do you say!?"

OMEGA: "YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE, MAKE YOUR TIME."

DOOM: "What's wrong with these scraps of metal!? AND HOW IN THE HOLY HIGH COSMIC HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO BE RELATED WITH THEM!?"

EGGMAN: "Errrrr, grand grand nephews?"

METAL SONIC: "ALL LIVING THINGS KNEEL BEFORE YOUR MASTER!"

DOOM: "Oh great… Another artificial made crazed hedgehog."

SHADOW / METAL SONIC (in unison): "DON'T COMPARE ME WITH THIS FAKER!"

The two crazehogs look to each other.

SHADOW / METAL: "SHUT UP, FAKER! NO YOU SHUT UP! STOP COPYING ME! OH YEAH? THAT'S HOW YOU LIKE IT? VERY GOOD! I'LL SHOW WHO'S THE ULTIMATE!!"

OMEGA: "DETECTING ABNORMAL AMOUNT OF TESTORERONE IN THE ATMOSFERE."

GAMMA: "POSSIBLE DBZ CLICHÉ FIGHT APPROCHING."

OMEGA: "INITIATING COWARDLY RUN-FOR-YOUR-LIFE PHASE."

EGGAM: "Metal Sonic, that is no way to treat your eeeerrrrr……… Grand cousin uncle! Yes, right."

GERALD: "Shadow T. Hedgehog! You should be ashamed of your self, a 50 years old man that starts a fight with a robot kid of barely ten years."

METAL: "He started first!"

SHADOW: "I'm ageless, like mommy!"

DOOM: "AND WHO'S SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR MOMMY!!"

DOOM / GERALD / EGGMAN (in unison): "YOU TWO ARE GROUNDED!!"

SHADOW / METAL: "IT'S NOT FARE!!"

MINION: "Bruuulghtffffmt?"

EVERYBODY: "SHUT UP, MINION!!"

MINION: "Mamma mia…"

DOOM: "I had enough of this pathetic excuse of a family reunion! I want all you out of my Comet, for good!"

SHADOW: "Wait! There's still someone missing here!"

DOOM: "WHO!?"

SHADOW: "Ehi big bro! Come and say hello to daddy!"

Enters the Biolizard…. And starts devouring the Black Comet.

DOOM: "NOOOOOOOO, MY EVILFUL HOUSE OF TERRORDOM!!"

SHADOW: "Whooops. Well, at least it's not embodying the comet with itself and starting a lethal descent to the Earth!"

Suddenly… Earth gets destroyed by a comet like mutated lizard and everybody dies… And the dinner is ruined.

And the moral just sucks.

The +ing End.