AN: Hey all! I'm back with yet another oneshot. You are more then welcome to kill me for abandoning my multi-chapter story, I would. lol.
Anyway – here, I'm ignoring season 5 cause it's annoying me and they're killing the great Dair.. so I made my own 8)
I hope you enjoy!
-This had been re-posted with some small changes.
Disclaimer – all belongs to the CW!
Sitting alone, on a lush sofa, make up all smeared and sobbing. In the middle of a huge, royal suite at the heart of Paris. If it weren't so sad, Blair would have laughed. But she couldn't. Because, well, she was sobbing.
Blair had no one to call. Serena was still not really speaking to her; Chuck was on a sex driven mission to forget her and Dan, well. Dan was the reason she was sobbing in the first place - so really - him she couldn't call.
How did she get here, she mentally asked herself, how did she get everything so screwed up?
This morning she was still a princess to be!
Blair was bored, alone in her hotel room; prince charming was off to some royal thing she did not belong to just yet. So she was left all alone for the night. She read all she could read for the night, so she turned on her TV, and to her delight "Roman Holiday" was on. She contemplated for half a second to maybe turn it off. Remembering that this was the last movie she watched with Dan and she really wasn't ready to face any of that just yet. But then she reminded herself that she was Audrey long before Dan ever came in to her life, so she got comfortable on her bed and pushed all Brooklyn thoughts away.
That unfortunately - did not work. In stead, all she could see was her and Dan. They were Anaya and Bradley. It was them; the princess and the journalist. The socialite and the struggling writer. It was them. So perfectly horribly them. And about half way into the movie not only was she in uncontrollable tears - she also knew that there was no way she can go through with this wedding. She had to get away. So she called Louis. And cried and cried and cried to him until eventually she was able to say that she couldn't marry him. She heard him laugh and for the life of her she couldn't see how this was even remotely funny.
He told her he never thought they'd get as far as they have, and that he understands and that he wishes her well, as long as he doesn't have to see it. That made Blair cry even harder. Louis tried to calm her, and after failing miserably he let her go, asking that she will call him in the morning so that he will know that she's okay. And so, Blair was left in a hotel room, in Paris, sobbing to herself.
Lifting her puffy eyes to the TV again she saw the beautiful shots of the streets of Rome. And then it struck her. If she can't go home, and cant stay in Paris - she'll fly to Rome! She'll fly there and stay there for as long as she needs to. Until she has mended herself to face the UES again.
Bolting out of bed she started packing in a hurry that was so un Blair like, she was already on the phone booking herself a flight. And because Blair is Blair - she found a flight in the middle of the night. And because Blair had connections that even god wishes he had, she even managed to get a suite, all to herself at one of Rome's most exclusive hotels. She managed to forget for a second in how much pain she was. Then, she passed a mirror in her room and looked at herself. She took a step closer.
She looked so much like the old Blair, the crazy uneasy one. Not the one she was these past few months. With Dan. Scratch that. Around Dan.
Blair looked over her shoulder to the TV, and there was a close-up on Bradley. Walking towards the TV and touching the screen lightly "I'm so sorry Humphrey" she whispered to it. Blair took a deep breath, and went back to packing - she still had a plain to catch.
On her way to the airport she texted Serena 'I'm not getting married. I'm not coming home yet. I'm sorry. I love you. B"
Then she shot down her phone.
It's been 3 months now. In Rome. And she was different. She carried herself differently. She walked the streets with an easy head, but a still heavy heart. She never turned her old phone back on, and was only in contact with her mother and fathers with this new number. Blair would spend her days walking around the city. Sipping on coffee or eating ice cream. She also took up photography and always had a camera with her. She kept herself occupied most of the time. She loved the brisk Italian air. She loved that she had no one to talk to. She loved that she was alone. She loved that she didn't have to think.
One day, she was sitting on the Spanish steps, taking pictures of children playing. She never felt him approach.
"You really should turn your phone back on," he said. She dropped her camera.
Blair turned around with wide eyes. If it was possible - Dan thought she was even prettier then he remembered.
"What..?' she trilled off not knowing what to do next.
He just smiled sheepishly and shuffled his feet.
"How did get here?" she asked
"A plain. Then a taxi" he answered. To that she just glared at him
"How did you find me?" she asked again.
"Ah" he said, with a finger in the air "it really want so hard" he admitted, "you left Paris, you couldn't go home. You're an Audrey fan. There really wasn't anywhere else for you to go" he finished with a satisfied smile.
Blair chuckled softly, "true" she mumbled.
And so they stood there. Barely looking at each other. Wanting to say so many things, yet choosing to say nothing.
Suddenly Dan bent down close to her, for a split second she was scared he was going to kiss her, a split second after that she wanted him to. But he just picked up her camera and handed it to her.
"I hope I didn't cost you your camera," he said as she took it. Blair examined it all around. "No. I thing she's okay" she said smiling shyly. He missed that smile. He likes to think, to himself, that he is the only one that gets this kind of shyness out of her.
They go back to looking at each other.
"Have you been shooting long?" Dan asked, breaking the silence again. She shakes her hen no "a few weeks is all" she said and turned around from him, to face the view she was looking at earlier "and I really don't think I'm doing all of this justice." she mentioned to the view. He took a step down and was now standing next to her. She heard him take a deep breath in. "I'd like to see the pictures you took?" he asks. Somehow - he knows she won't turn him down. She doesn't. She nods and mentions for him to follow her.
They take a cad back to her place, because really, Blair can never really change. She will never use public transportation.
The ride is silent. Easy, and silent.
When they get to her hotel she hears him chuckle. "What?" she sakes
"Only you Blair" he said "only you can have such an amazing place in Rome, and call it home". Blair just smiles.
"Only you" he says again. Tenderly, intimately. But they, or she, aren't ready, so she ignores and invites him up.
The apartment is.. different. There are pictures scattered in a sort of organized way all over the place. It's Blair's version of a mess.
Blair puts her camera down "pick any pile you want," she said "I'll make us some coffee"
Dan is walking around looking at all the pictures he can. As if trying to take in all the time that has passed since he had last seen her.
He can see in what pictures she had a good day, and in which bad, where she was distracted, or focused, he just knew her that well. It was really kind of scary.
"Lets drink in the balcony, it's a really nice day" she said and took the tray outside.
They set across from each other.
For a minute. Three. Five.
"Why didn't you get merrier?" he asked, she knew it was coming.
"Why did you come here?" she retorted. He, also, knew it was coming.
"I asked first," he said childishly.
"Fine." she took a deep breath. Deciding she can't tell the truth yet. "I suddenly saw it wasn't right." he could tell she wasn't telling the truth. But if he knew anything, it was to not push Blair. He needed to let her tell him herself. So he let the lie slide.
"Now you." she said.
He smiled at her. And she took a deep breath -waiting for something she didn't know if she wanted to hear. " I wanted to know why you didn't get married," he confessed. Also, half-truth.
"Why didn't you come home?" he asked. "Real reasons," he added.
It took her a while to answer. "I had nothing at home." she said finally. "Serena still wasn't talking to me " she said tenthly and avoided his eyes "Chuck is. You know, Chuck. And you." she said, meeting his gaze, but only for a moment "you.. I couldn't face you, after what I did. And you had Charlie.. So.." she trailed off.
Now it was his turn to be quiet for a while.
"Why are you here?" she asked again. Dan looked at her. And he just knew -that now is the time. The last stand. He will get no second chance. "Because I was with Charlie," he said, not missing the winch Blair made. "And then Serena came blasting into the loft with her phone in her hand screaming for me to look at it." he takes a sip of his coffee. "And I did. And I was happy. So happy that it made Serena cry," he laughs at the memory "she said to me that if I'm this happy you're not getting married then maybe she was wrong. And that I need to find you and.. Well.. Find you." he said timidly, under Blair's watchful eye. "And so we tried calling, and calling and calling, but someone didn't not turn her phone back on" he accused, and Blair took an innocent sip of the coffee failing to hide her smile. "And we tried your parents - but they wouldn't tell us anything. They are so loyal!" he said impressed. Blair just shrugged "I've trained them well" she said casually.
"And then" Dan continued, "Breakfast at tiffanies was on TV. And it hit me. You're in Rome. And so I booked a flight and landed here last week" Blair looked surprised. "It took you a week to find me?" she asked.
Dan shook his head no "it took me day. I've been building up courage up until now."
Blair frowned "that's really creepy. you know that right?" she asked.
"Oh well" he said and looked down at the busy street below them.
"You didn't answer me." Blair said.
Dan turned to her bewildered "I just gave you a play by play!" he protested.
"Yes," Blair nodded "of how you got here. Not why you're here."
"Blair.." he said quietly.
And now was her turn. Truth time.
" I was sitting in my hotel in Paris" she started, "and suddenly Roman Holiday came on." the she took a really deep breath. "And all I could see was you and Me." she admitted. If Dan wasn't sitting, he was sure he would have fallen. "And I couldn't do it. I just.. I just really couldn't." she said, with tears in her eyes.
Tipping the char he was sitting on, Dan got up, took one long step towards Blair. Pulled her up and just kissed her. He didn't mean for t to happen like that. He didn't want it to happen like that. He just had to kiss her. Now.
Breaking away for air "this;" he said breathlessly "this is why I'm here."
Blair smiled at him. Then took a step back. Dan looked at her puzzled.
"Things are different now," she said looking up to the sky.
"What?" Dan asked, not believing that after all this time. After actually advancing the plot – she's backing out.
"Things are different. I am different. I don't want the same things," she admitted quietly.
Sitting back down on the chair Dan took a deep breath. He looked at Blair's back and tried to put in order all the rushing thoughts in head, "so, what are you saying here really?" he asked "what is it that you wanted and now don't want?" Blair just shrugged and kept looking up and around her tiny balcony. Dan wrinkled his nose, he really didn't want to ask this question out loud, "Is it me?" he asked tenderly.
Blair turned back around to face him "is it you what?" she asked.
Dan shook his head, not believing that she's actually making him say these things "is it me that you wanted and now don't?"
Blair smiled softly at him, "no, it's not." She said. Dan begun to take a step towards her, but she held out her hand "it's the trouble you bring with you that I don't want" she said. At this point, Daniel Humphrey was way beyond confused.
"I've made a good life here," Blair begun explaining. "A really good life. I get up every morning with an easy head. I go about my days free. I have no drama. No one is looking at me, following me. I never thought I'd say this – but life far from gossip girl has done me good" she said with a wistful smile.
"You don't check gossip girl anymore?" just as soon as the words fell out of his mouth he rerated them. What kind of stupid question is that? Blair must have thought the same because she frowned her brow but answered non-the less "it took me a while, but eventually I stopped, yeah" she admitted.
Dan was proud. But still confused. " I still don't understand what it has to do with me?"
Blair bit her lip. She was trying to find the right words "you.. You're the upper east side," she said. Dan snorted at her. "Yeah, I know. Trust me – it hurt me to say as much as it hurt you to hear" they shared a knowing smile, "but you are. And I've closed that chapter. Maybe not forever, but for now. You see? I like me here" she said and pointed to her smiling face " I'm still me, but with an unexpected twist. I'm actually happy. I have no plots running around my head, only when I need to get away from the cops "she said with an evil smile "and I really do make the best out of each day, and night and moment in space and time. And you?" she looked at Dan sadly "you are an opening to a book I don't want to read" a single, perfectly shaped tear, run down her cheek. Dan nodded at her.
After a moment he stood up, and walked up to where Blair was standing. He put his hands on the rails of the balcony and breathed deeply. After a few more seconds he turned to Blair. A second tear followed the same path as the first moments ago. Dan wiped the tear away with his thumb. "What if you don't have to?" he asked.
Blair looked at him puzzled "okay?"
"What if I stay here? We see how things go, and maybe.. Some days from now – we'll go home?" Blair looked at him like he just gave her the moon.
"You'll do that?" she asked in complete awe, "you'll stay in Rome for me?"
Dan smiled down at her and lightly pressed his lips to hers "I'll stay in Rome for you."
Speechless Blair just hugged him. As close as she possibly could. "Thank you." She muffled into his shirt.
"You're welcome." He said and dropped a sweet kiss on the top of her head. "But you do know we have to go back home eventually, right?" he asked. Blair simply nodded. "I know," she said, and then looked up at him "but not tonight" she finished with what was possibly the sexiest smile Dan had ever seen, and started pulling him back into the apartment.
"No," Dan said, "not tonight".
They spent the entire night making love. Home will still be there in the morning.
For every review an angel gats wings!
Xoxo
Michaela 8)
