What happened to Sirius Black is truly one of the biggest tragedies I have ever known. He was a good man, who had tried to live a good life amongst many struggles, only to disappear forever beyond the veil in the Ministry's Department of Mysteries, another man dead to whisper to the living. I miss him very much.

You probably wonder, Who is she, to say she misses someone when she was not even present when the man had died, as were the few people living to whom he remained close to? You wonder, How come no one knew of her relationship with this man before coming forward just now?

If you will take the time to listen, I will take the time to explain. I will explain all about my relationship with Sirius Black, and how much in love we were with each other.

While I cannot speak for you, it is my belief that it only makes sense to start at the beginning. I was ten years old, soon to be eleven, and I was about to begin my experience as a student at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

I was excited, a little nervous, yes, but excited. I stood on Platform Nine and Three Quarters with my mum, dad, and older sister. My sister was returning to Hogwarts for her third year of school, and I had a lot to live up to as far as social status was concerned. She was attractive, with a nice body and a long sheet of dark brown hair. She was only thirteen, but she had a lot of friends and was really into boys. My mum and dad hugged us both and helped us take our luggage over to the train.

"Now, Ashley," my dad said to my sister, putting his hands on her shoulders and giving her a smile that told her he was serious about what he was saying, "do not ignore your sister. I want you to check up on her and help her when she needs help. Don't abandon her for your friends."

Ashley raised her eyebrows and said impatiently, "Okay, Dad."

"I mean it."

"Okay, Dad!"

"All right, girls," my mum said, putting a hand on each of our heads (Ashley huffed and looked away in annoyance), "be good, do well in your studies, write, and have a good year."



"Thanks, Mum," we both mumbled. We picked up the rest of our luggage and got on the train.

I looked left and right, not sure where to find a seat. Should I get an empty compartment, and hope someone comes in and talks to me? Or would it be cooler for me to find a compartment that already had people in it and ask them if I could join? I bit my lip, unsure of what to do. I wanted to be a cool kid like my sister, because if I was not, I knew Ashley would make me feel bad a lot and subtly show our parents how she had more of a life than I.

Of course, I realized she had just turned thirteen, and I would not even be eleven for another two months, and let's face it, at eleven, not a lot of kids really had a true social life. Still, I felt I had to start ahead of time.

"Don't bug me unless you really need something," Ashley told me, moving past me with her trunk. "Maybe I'll see you later. Be good." Before I could say anything, she was further down the train and in a compartment with her friends. I knew better than to follow, so I went in the opposite direction. I was thinking I would find a compartment that was not empty and try to be assertive and make friends, but what if I mistook older kids for younger ones? Then they would just make fun of me.

I decided to just find an empty compartment and hope for the best.

I found one, dragging my trunk inside and plopping down on the floor with an "oomph!" I kicked it against the wall and sat down, placing my feet on top of the trunk. I then took my bag from off my shoulder and set it on my lap, looking up at the open doorway. Chatting students walked by without sparing my compartment a glance. Sighing, I decided to pull my notebook and quill from my bag so I could doodle. I did not want to look like the awkward, lonely kid desperate for some company. I wanted to appear as if I did not care whether anyone joined me or not, like I was perfectly content by myself. I started sketching a cartoon of myself sticking gum in my sister's perfect hair.

I went at sketching for a couple minutes, looking out the window once to check that the train had not started moving yet. I was actually getting quite into my drawing when I heard a knock that startled me and made me jump slightly.

Looking up, I saw a boy standing in the doorway. He was tall and thin with pale skin dark eyes. His black hair was styled perfectly, not being too long, but not really being a short cut. His bangs were growing out and they framed his face perfectly. He was cute, but there were a lot of cute boys and I did not really think much of it.

The boy grinned at me. "Sorry I scared you," he said. "I was just wondering if I could join you. I don't really know anyone yet."



"Sure, no problem," I told him as if it was nothing. I would have preferred a girl to come find me, but I had had a lot of guy friends when I was younger and did not mind.

"Thanks," he said. He pulled his trunk inside and set it on the seat next to him, sitting across from me. "Whatcha drawing?"

"Huh? Oh, this. It's just something stupid I started. It's of my sister and I."

"Can I see?" the boy asked.

"Oh," I said, taken aback, "well, yeah, I suppose. I mean, it's nothing neat, it's just a doodle I did because I was bored." I handed him the notebook and he looked at the picture and laughed.

"Nice," he said, handing it back to me. "So, what's your name?"

"Emma Benson. Yours?"

"Sirius Black," he answered with pride. "So what house do you want to be in?"

"Well, my sister's in Ravenclaw, but I think I'd rather be in Gryffindor," I told him, surprised about how I had answered this question honestly for the first time. Most of my family expected me to be in Ravenclaw with Ashley. The thought of them finding out I was in another house made me bite my lip.

"What's wrong?" the boy asked.

"Nothing. I just hope my parents don't get mad if I am in Gryffindor. It'd be better than Slytherin, but still…I just think they might be a little bummed if I'm not in the same house as my sister." To my annoyance, Sirius chuckled. "What?"

"Well, they won't wallop you, will they?" he asked with a laugh.

"No…" I raised my eyebrow. "They love me. If anything, they might just make a couple comments or something. I don't know."

"If they love you then you'll be fine. Don't worry about it," Sirius said breezily, leaning back in his seat and clasping his hands relaxingly behind his head.

"What about you?" I asked.

"What about me?"

"What house are you hoping for?"



Sirius looked at me for a brief moment in a way that suggested to me he was hiding hesitation before answering, "Gryffindor."

"Do your mom and dad want you in a different house?"

"Eh, maybe," he shrugged. "Doesn't really matter to me what they want." Sirius grinned, but I thought he was showing me false feelings on the matter.

Before I could ask anything else, however, another boy's head popped into the doorway. This boy's hair was black like Sirius', but it did not have the same elegance. As a matter of fact, it was quite messy. I wondered if he had even brushed it before coming to the train station. He wore glasses over a pair of hazel eyes and his skin was a little more tan, seeming to see the outdoors more often. He was only a little shorter than Sirius and was a little more stockier in build.

He ran a hand through his messy hair and said, "Hey, could I sit with you guys?"

"Sure, mate," Sirius responded jovially, patting the seat on the other side of his trunk. I nodded. The new boy sat down where Sirius had gestured and placed his trunk under his feet like I had with mine.

"Thanks. So who're you guys?" he asked.

"I'm Sirius Black, and that's Emma Benson," Sirius told him. The boy held out his hand.

"James Potter," he said confidently, first shaking Sirius' hand, then reaching over to shake mine. I smiled politely as I did. These boys both seemed quite confident. I wondered if they would be friends with someone like me or if they would be too cool and want to find better people to hang out with.

The train started moving. I noticed the boys seemed to be getting along quite well with each other. I wondered: if they became friends, would there still be room for me?