A/N: Poor Andrew. :C Spandrew, if you squint. ;)
Affection
Sometimes Andrew opens his mouth and words come out; stupid words that he know's he shouldn't say because they're most likely innapropriate and unnecessary, but he just says them anyway. Well, that happens most of the time, actually. But it's just 'cause he's nervous, and he wants to be heard, and he never knows what to say.
Like when his mother raved about Tucker in front of him. Like when his dad used to ask, mouth turned down in ever-present dissapointment: "Why can't you be more like your brother?" How do you respond to something like that?
And there's always this tight little knot in his tummy that pulls and makes his chest ache with regret. He's a geek and a loser. He's oblivious and feminine and unwanted. He's Andrew. He knows that nobody really cares what he has to say. The only group he's ever been part of... Well, Warren used him, and he killed the only real friend he's ever had.
It's kind of pathetic the way he follows these people around like a goddamn puppy, begging to be loved even when they kick him. But the words persist, and bubble from his throat. Notice me. See me. I'm real, and I'm not going away.
Even though part of him does want to go away. Wants to fade from himself until there's nothing left. But he keeps that part silent, as much as he can. Don't let them know how much it hurts, or how worthless you think you are. If you do, they win.
Andrew is not stupid. He's not as oblivious as everybody thinks he is. He can see very clearly that, to most of these people, he's nothing more than a mess on the bottom of their shoes. An annoyance. A pest.
The only person who's ever treated him with an ounce of dignity is Spike. Well, Spike isn't a 'person', in the technical sense, but he is very much real. Even if he only tolerated Andrew for moments at a time... that's enough.
It's silly, and it's sad, but Andrew's cup is small and easily filled. And all he really wants is some sort of affection.
